The Morning Tailgate

There are many candidates for today’s ceremonial First Bratwurst.

Joe Torre definitely deserves consideration, given the news that he speaks candidly about his time with the Yankees in Tom Verducci’s soon-to-be new book The Yankee Years.

Among many other things, we (supposedly) learn through Torre about Alex Rodriguez’s obsession with besting all things Derek Jeter—and that Yankee teammates took a cue from Skip Bayless in calling Rodriguez “A-Fraud”.

Then there’s WWE wrestler Randy Orton, who outlasted 29 other participants in last night’s Royal Rumble to advance to the main event of WrestleMania 25. Since Orton was born, raised and still resides in St. Louis, Imig thinks Randy should get dibs on the first brat. Actually, that’s not the reason—Imig just really likes wrestling and still thinks it’s real.

However, Orton and Torre take a back seat to the Covenant School of Dallas, for firing its women’s basketball coach, Micah Grimes, after the team defeated Dallas Academy 100-0. The school posted an apology on its Web site, which Grimes disagreed with because he was certain his ladies played with integrity and class.

While Bill Belichick awards his first bratwurst to Grimes for his take-no-prisoners attitude, we hand over the sausage to Covenant School of Dallas for firing a guy who appears to be a professional loser.

January 25

1935 - Bob Uecker, former Major League Baseball player and current play-by-play announcer for the Milwaukee Brewers, is born into the world.  Uecker has been a figurehead in the Milwaukee press box since 1971, but perhaps is best known for playing the great Harry Doyle in the Major League flicks. Juuuust a bit outside…

1961 - Wayne Gretzky is born. “The Great One” holds 40 regular-season records, 15 playoff records, six All-Star records, and one pretty attractive spouse with gambling problems.

2009 - America preps for 144 hours of exhausting Super Bowl coverage leading up to Sundays game. We can’t wait to see all the wacky stories from Media Day.###MORE###

Headline writers across the country have been loving CC Sabathia ever since the trade deadline last July.  Unfortunately, it looks like they’re out of “C&C Music Factory” references and have moved on to using “CC” as a verb.

We here at JSF enjoy M&M’s just as much as the next guy.  They’ve maintained their status as of the better candy products even amidst a constant flood of new competition. 

But as tasty as they can be, one sure-fire way to make them lose their appeal is to post an ad in a well-known sports magazine where the “pitch man” is the product of a torrid love affair between Michael Strahan and a peanut M&M. 

Yeah we get that it’s supposed to be a cute little character, but between the lack of a nose, the gap tooth and the fact that there is a hair on the M&M, it’s pretty much terrifying. 

We’re just praying that they don’t do Terry Bradshaw next.

Select clips from Thursday’s JoeSportsFan Radio Show will make their way onto the site, so that one can listen without having to stare at our mugs.

Patrick Imig produces an ode to his hero - Vince McMahon.