WWE Elimination Chamber 2012: Cena vs. Kane Will Upstage Main Event

Leave it to the WWE to overshadow its own product with a silly, insufferably cheesy storyline.

That will certainly be the case on Sunday at the 2012 WWE Elimination Chamber in Milwaukee, where the ongoing feud between John Cena and Kane will manifest itself once again in an Ambulance Match.

Though, ironically enough, whoever wins will be hijacking more than just an emergency vehicle.

In this case, the sideshow of Kane vs. Cena—with Zack Ryder and Eve Torres as sideshows to the sideshow (try wrapping your head around that one)—is all too poised to overshadow the goings-on in the "Callous Coliseum," the tail that is the WWE hierarchy looking not only to wag the dog, but consume it entirely.

It's a shame, too, considering just how predictable the whole circus seems to be at this point. Kane's plot to turn Cena heel is bound to fall flat, assuming it hasn't already. If CM Punk, the fan favorite that he is, couldn't make the robotic, prototypical Cena a villain by comparison, then how could Kane, a blast-from-the-past heel if there ever was one, possibly hope to "spoil" Cena, to coax him into embracing the hate rather than rising above it?

Surely, Vince McMahon and the WWE brass wouldn't stick their collectively gigantic neck out in such a way as to jeopardize their most prized (and profitable) product. Cena is too important an ambassador for wrestling to force into a mold of evil, what with the work he's done with the military and the Make-A-Wish Foundation, among others.

So unless the WWE is suddenly going to go rogue on itself and turn John Cena's too-pristine persona into some sort of diabolical doppelganger, Kane will end up strapped to the gurney, Cena will drive the ambulance out of the arena and the world will continue to turn in the same oddly monotonous manner that WWE's handlers would most prefer for their bottom line.

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