Westminster Dog Show 2012 Results: Dog Show Clearly Values Dignity over Looks

If the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue followed in the footsteps of the Westminster Dog Show, it wouldn't make it off the shelves.

The winner of the 2012 Westminster Dog Show was announced on Valentine's Day, and let's just say "it" wasn't pretty.

As Maura Judkis writes:

"

Malachy, a four-year-old stub-faced Pekingese, was named Best in Show at the 136th annual Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show on Feb. 14.

"

Aw, how cute. First of all, the dog's name is Malachy. Second of all, he/she/it is being described as "stub-faced."

If the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue announced a stub-faced woman by the name of Malachy was on the cover, I'd turn and run, fearing the apocalypse was nearing.

But fortunately for those of us who value prestige over beauty (i.e. those of us who aren't shallow), we have the Westminster Dog Show.

Apparently, Pekingese dogs are supposed to move "with a 'slow and dignified' gait," per the Washington Post.

Malachy's handler, David Fitzpatrick, said upon receiving the award, via the Post, “No other dog moves like this."

Writers across the land wrote some interesting things about Malachy's looks.

Per the Style Blog, media outlets have described Malachy as "Cousin Itt's pet," "a (regal) cross between a slow-moving hair ball and an overgrown hamster," a "walking dust mop," "Snooki," and, my favorite, "like Mitt Romney — only better groomed.”

Apparently, the Dog Show judges dogs by the "breed standard." That is, how they compare to dogs of their same breed.

I'm guessing Malachy was considered the best Snooki of them all.