The Doctor's WWE SmackDown Recap: The 124 Things We Learned, Loved and Hated

If the term lukewarm ever applied to anything, it applied to tonight's SmackDown. The show had some great action, as well as some terrible moments, which evened out to an average show.

We got another combination of matches featuring five guys from the Chamber match as well as Rumble winner Sheamus. Orton and Bryan had a great match to cap off the show, while Big Show and Sheamus beat Barrett and Rhodes in what was a good tag match.

We had yet another week of no Brodus Clay, as well as another gas problem segment with Natalya, which both left me feeling like this week had too many low points.

Tamina and Beth finally had a run-in after Beth beat Alicia Fox and tried to attack her again after the match. Tamina made the save and the two just stared each other down in what is sure to lead to a title shot for Tamina sometime soon.

We also got a call from John Laurinaitis, who was supposedly in Abu Dhabi to talk about how he was kept as the GM of Raw by the Board of Directors.

The Great Khali defeated Jinder Mahal in a squash match and Ted Dibiase beat Hunico in two of the quicker matches of the night. Khali and Mahal was probably the shortest match next to the Divas match, which was 1:18 from bell to bell.

Before I get to business, I would like to give a quick shout out to Scott Murphy and Rocher Warsop for responding to my request for how much it costs to produce a WWE show each week, I appreciate it, guys.

Each week I recap SmackDown with one of my long lists, which is made up of equal parts humor, recap, predictions, questions, answers, revelations and any other observations from the show.

My goal is to make this a different kind of recap from the normal stuff, so I hope you enjoy this week's 124 things we learned, loved and hated from SmackDown.

1. The show opens up with Michael Cole welcoming us to SmackDown.
2. Shocked they didn't have some kind of video recap to start the show.
3. Sheamus comes out to a nice pop as he is introduced by Garcia as the Rumble winner.
4. I wonder why Booker T's Twitter handle has 5x at the end; wasn't he a six-time champion?
5. Maybe just @bookert was taken already.
6. Sheamus brings up that he gets a choice at which champion he gets to face, but he isn't picking his opponent until after the Chamber.
7. He brings up being bullied as a kid; I wonder if he really was bullied or if it is just to go along with the Be a STAR campaign?
8. He's proud to be a pasty-faced, redheaded Irishman.
9. Barrett's music hits and he comes out to interrupt; I wonder if this will end in a brawl?
10. That last part was supposed to be sarcastic, obviously it will end in a brawl.
11. Barrett says he has a little respect for Sheamus but thinks he should challenge the WWE champion because Barrett will win the chamber match and thinks he can beat Sheamus.
12. I have always thought these guys would make the perfect tag team; they have a similar build but totally different looks and styles in the ring.
13. Awesome, Cody Rhodes is out to make his impact felt.
14. He brings up his WrestleMania experience and the fact that he is a current champion.
15. He declares he will be the first-ever World and IC champion.
16. Big Show is out next. OK maybe I was wrong, this will probably turn into a tag match now that four guys are involved.
17. Show is all smiles tonight—surprising, given what happened Monday.
18. He respects Sheamus so he is going to speak for him.
19. Show says he will slap the taste out of Cody's mouth.
20. Hmm, strange—Show is not here to make any promises.
21. He proposes Show versus Sheamus at 'Mania for the World title and Barrett is not happy about the idea.
22. Ha, Barrett brings up that Snooki has a better win record at 'Mania than Show.
23. Whoa, Show slaps the hell out of Rhodes and all hell breaks loose as Sheamus and Show clear the ring of Rhodes and Barrett.
24. Where's Teddy Long to make this a tag match? He loves to do that.
25. We're back and Jinder Mahal is out and doing something new where he puts his ceremonial headwear in a glass case.
26. I am still on the fence on this guy; he has good heel potential in his character, but he hasn't shown me much in the ring yet.
27. Khali is out next to what has to be an edited-in pop; it sounds like the roof blew off the building and the crowd looks a little bored for the most part.
28. Mahal looks better with the beard, more sinister looking.
29. Wow, they actually acknowledge their old storyline about being brothers-in-law. I expected that to be glossed over.
30. If anyone reading this was actually at the show, let me know if the crowd actually chanted "Khali" or if that was another edit.
31. Khali hits the two-handed choke slam for the win in a pretty quick match.
32. Hey, where's his old manager with the mutton chops?
33. They replay Henry getting suspended last week.
34. We go backstage to see Aksana using more innuendos than a cheap Cinemax flick.
35. Daniel Bryan walks in and butts in, which upsets a clearly horny Teddy Long.
36. He is pushing his vegan agenda again.
37. As I write this, I am eating some buffalo wings, so I guess I am not invited to Bryan's next vegan cookout, NOW CLEAN THIS MESS UP, WOODHOUSE!
38. Long asks what Bryan actually eats? My guess is a lot of tofu and carrots.
39. Bryan tries to get out of his match by saying he feels sick from hearing about Long's BBQ.
40. Long gives him a little speech about toughening up and getting ready for his match.
41. Does anyone else think Aksana always looks like she should be trying to distract James Bond at a casino?
42. Beth Phoenix is out next to face Alicia "Foxxy Mama."
43. Did Fox just use Trish's matrix move? Not cool.
44. This week's Divas match lasted a staggering 1:18. I really should start having a poll to see who can predict the length of Divas matches to the right second.
45. Beth tries to attack Fox again, but Tamina is out for the save and she and Beth just have a staredown.
46. There is something about Tamina's eyes that makes me stare; they are very striking. She does not get enough credit for how attractive she is with all these other Divas running around who are 100 pounds.
47. Beth and Nattie, too. I think they are very good-looking women.
48. Ha, nice coincidence, Tyson Kidd is backstage talking to Nattie right now.
49. She is talking about how embarrassing it is to talk too much, but Tyson thinks she is talking about farting.
50. Then she farts. Wonderful.
51. HAHAHA, OK, it was pretty funny when Hornswoggle walked in and passed out with his legs up in the air like a cartoon.
52. She tries to blame it on Kidd and just runs off.
53. I hate that this gimmick has been able to make me laugh because it is such a terrible use for one of WWE's best female workers.
54. Wait, was the tag match with Rhodes/Barrett vs. Show/Sheamus made when I wasn't looking?
55. Show wants Rhodes in the ring first.
56. He tags in Barrett and jumps out of the ring right away.
57. After one giant slap to the chest, Barrett does the same thing and Rhodes is back in.
58. Rhodes sells Show's chest chop like it was the worst thing he has ever felt.
59. Rhodes takes a big fall when Show drops him from a gorilla press.
60. Show tags in Sheamus and Barrett tags back.
61. Sheamus uses Mr. Anderson's rolling fireman's carry finisher again for a two-count.
62. Ohhh, Big Show just grabs the side of Rhodes right below the ribs and squeezes; that would hurt so bad if he was putting all his strength into it.
63. Is it me or is Cole being a lot less annoying tonight? He isn't complaining about much.
64. Nice, Rhodes hits a great-looking Beautiful Disaster for a close two-count.
65. I still think that Big Show should be using the spear as a finisher; it just seems like it would be so brutal if a 500-pound guy barreled through someone.
66. Sheamus wins with the Brogue Kick on Barrett for the three-count.
67. Cole is going to interview AJ after the commercial in what is sure to be a Pulitzer-worthy segment.
68. I forgot AJ had her own entrance music; I haven't heard it in awhile.
69. Cole is being strange.
70. AJ says she loves Bryan but doesn't blame the Big Show.
71. She says Cole has done more damage than the Big Show.
72. This is so weird; she defends Big Show, then she defends Bryan to Cole as well as all the Divas. Which side is she on?
73. You don't often get a face woman pairing with a heel guy these days.
74. What is going on here? Cole is going all heel on AJ, but he is attacking Bryan, who is also a heel.
75. He tries to tell AJ that Bryan has been using her.
76. Bryan comes out to stop this. Who is the crowd supposed to be cheering in this situation?
77. Did anyone see The Soup this week where Joel McHale blasted Bryan? It was pretty funny.
78. While we were all watching the Super Bowl, Mr. I Don't Eat Meat was taking a nature walk.
79. I love that the crowd is booing recycling. That is how you know a heel character is working, if they can get heat for doing something we are supposed to do anyways.
80. It looks like he is trying to get out of his match again by leaving in a Prius.
81. Line of the night from Booker: "You should be more professional, AJ is sweeter than Carnation Milk."
82. Long stops Bryan from leaving in the back and says he will get AJ a ride home but if Bryan leaves, he loses the title.
83. The leader of the DiBiase Posse is out next. I guess his injury isn't bad enough to keep him out of action.
84. Hunico is out next with Camacho and another low-rider bike.
85. Can we just put Hunico back in the Sin Cara outfit; I hate his ring attire.
86. It's like someone in the back said, "Hey, how does every Mexican gangsta look in the movies? That's what Hunico should wear."
87. Although, he is wearing pants, which is something more superstars need to do. Too many guys in basic trunks and boots these days.
88. DiBiase wins with a roll-up when Hunico goes for a submission.
89. Short match but decent back-and forth-action. I think these guys could have a great 20-minute match if given the chance.
90. They show a pretty good video package recapping Triple H turning down the Undertaker.
91. Even though I was against a third match between them at 'Mania, I like how it is being built with Trips saying he doesn't want to end the streak but knows he could.
92. I guess Johnny Ace was kept as Raw GM per an announcement on WWE.com.
93. Why the hell are they pretending JL is in Abu Dhabi calling in?
94. Wait, is he really there? It isn't that ridiculous now that I think about it.
95. Orton is out for the main event after the "Call from Abu Dhabi" is over.
96. So does this mean a fourth WWE show in a row without Brodus Clay? What the hell, WWE?
97. I still laugh when Bryan comes out screaming "World Heavyweight Champion" while pointing at his title.
98. Big Show is commentary.
99. Good God, Orton, lighten up on the oil; your legs look like plastic legs off a Ken doll.
100. They are moving slow, feeling each other out early on in the match.
101. The pace quickens and we get some nice reversals and back-and-forth action.
102. Orton hits a great dropkick for a two-count; good match in the early going.
103. Show looks like he wants to interfere when Bryan is on the outside, but Orton waves him off.
104. Amazing, right before they cut to commercial, you can hear someone clearly yell, "Come on, Pork Chop" at Daniel Bryan. Priceless WWE fan commentary.
105. As we come back, Bryan is in control with a unique-looking hammerlock.
106. Orton counters into his trademark backbreaker.
107. Orton hits a nice-looking gutwrench drop move that makes Big Show say, "Wow."
108. Orton sells some damage to his arm as he goes for a superplex and gets shoved off.
109. Bryan goes for a flying headbutt but misses and Orton is back in control.
110. Bryan ends up escaping the rope-hung DDT but gets crotched on the top turnbuckle.
111. Orton hits the superplex—this time and gets a near fall.
112. Good match from these guys.
113. Cole is trying to make fun of Big Show, and Booker and Show are just making fun of him back.
114. Bryan almost gets the LeBell lock on, but Orton breaks free and ends up hitting the rope-hung DDT this time.
115. He is psyching up for the RKO and Show is happy.
116. Bryan rolls out of the ring to avoid Orton and grabs his title to walk away.
117. He tries to attack Show, but Show throws him back in the ring and he eats an RKO.
118. The ref ends up ending the match, though, and Bryan is the winner after a DQ.
119. Orton is pissed and he shoves Show after the match for ruining his match.
120. Show pushes Orton to the ground and Orton just leaps onto him and they start brawling.
121. This is pretty awesome the way they are fighting.
123. The show ends with Bryan watching as the two beat each other up.
123. Great way to end the show. Orton and Show getting into it was a nice exchange, which looked really well planned out.
124. Overall, this show did nothing to make me love it or hate it—not bad, but not a memorable night, either.

Thanks for reading and please feel free to share your thoughts and additions to the list below, and don't forget to check back after every Raw and SmackDown for my weekly recap lists.

I would also like to mention that Feb. 10 was the nine-year anniversary of the passing of Mr. Perfect. Rest in peace, Curt Hennig, you are missed.

I would also like to say how sad I was to hear about the death of Don Cornelius this past week. He was the creator of the show Soul Train and was a pioneer in television history. The world has a little less soul now.