Congratulations, Ohio State!!! You've finally beaten a team from the SEC!!!
You needed them to drop 6 passes, Ryan Mallett to twice overthrow wide open receivers who would have gone all the way, a fumble by Terrelle Pryor to bounce right through the hands of Arkansas cornerback Ramon Broadway and into the end zone, where Buckeye receiver Dane Sanzenbacher was right there for the TD, and a blocked punt that could have been housed by Julian Horton that was instead just fallen on (Arkansas didn't score).
So, yes, the scoreboard and the papers say you beat Arkansas, but in reality, fate, momentum and Arkansas beat Arkansas.
And even after all those self inflicted wounds by the Hogs? You STILL almost lost. If Ryan Mallett makes one more play, then you lose, you're twice the disgrace you were entering the game, and your conference loses the last millionth of an ounce of respect fans across the country have for you.
But this doesn't cover up that the SEC embarrassed the Big 10 on New Year's Day.
First Mississippi State demolished Michigan 52-14.
Then Alabama crushed 9th ranked and co-champion Michigan State 49-7.
But the most embarrassing one had to be Florida defeating Penn State 37-24. The Gators offense, for one last time under Steve Addazio, was abysmal. Their TD drives were- ready? 0 yards, 0 yards, 14 yards, and 21 yards. Then there was a drive that began at the PSU 13 that gained no points.
HOW THE HELL CAN YOU LOSE A GAME WHERE THE OPPOSING OFFENSE IS THAT BAD???
It's the entire conference. It's not a bad game, a bad season, it happens every year.
Especially to my targets, THE Ohio State University.
Remember how you guys were so much faster, more physical and more overall talented than Florida in 2006? Remember how you guys were favored by 16 points and everybody was taking you?
Chris Leak wasn't supposed to call out audibles, roll out and throw to a wide open Dallas Baker for a stunningly easy touchdown on the first drive. Tim Tebow the freshman wasn't supposed to run over, around, and through you for more total yards than your entire team did in the first half. In fact, he wasn't supposed to either run for OR throw for a TD. Percy Harvin, another freshman, wasn't supposed to break an average of a tackle and a half per touch.
In short, Florida wasn't supposed to administer what was nothing short of a complete and utter beatdown over you guys.
But they did.
Remember what LSU did to you in that same Sugar Bowl for the National Championship the very next year? Remember how you were pissed about getting manhandled by Florida and wanted revenge against the SEC?
Beanie Wells wasn't supposed to get stuffed every time by Ricky Jean Francois and Glenn Dorsey. Matt Flynn's anemic offense wasn't supposed to lead long, punishing drives for laughably easy touchdowns. Jacob Hester wasn't supposed to run through you guys like you were made of feathers.
And in short, LSU wasn't supposed to even touch your fiery spirit, let alone win by two touchdowns.
But they did.
So don't celebrate for years to come "WE BEAT THE SEC!!!" because you, I, and everyone knows what happens when the SEC team plays well.
Ohio State loses.
Every single time.
0-9 coming into last night, that one win should have an asterisk because Arkansas made numerous stupid mistakes (six penalties to OSU's two) and still came 18 yards away from winning.
So go ahead and celebrate.
Just remember what happens when you play an SEC team that doesn't kill themselves with costly dropped passes, muffed fumble recoveries, penalties, and other deadly miscues.
Well, you're 0-9 when that happens