NFL Power Rankings: Week 6....in Limericks!
By (Senior Writer) on October 14, 2009
2,151 reads
Ronnie Brown and the Wildcat.
Peyton Manning and 300-yard games.
Dick Jauron and pitiful coaching.
Some things just go hand in hand in the NFL. For me, it's NFL power rankings and limericks. On that note, here's a look at where teams stand heading into Week 6.
As always, comments, in limerick form, are encouraged.
32. St. Louis Rams
Watching the Rams leaves fans in awe
They're so bad it's hard not to guffaw
Boller can't move the ball
The defense never fails to appall
Good luck with that Rush Limbaugh!
31. Tampa Bay Bucs
Ah, silly Raheem Morris
His offensive line is porous
He's already benched one QB
And told a coordinator to flee
Calls for firing will come in chorus
30. Washington Redskins
This team has two wins...true
Overly lowly teams 31 and 32
They ended the Lions' streak
Jim Zorn's future looks bleak
When they lose to KC, fans will boo
29. Kansas City Chiefs
Chiefs-Redskins? I'll shield my eyes
Matt Cassell hasn't exactly been a prize
Although the offense came alive
In last week's late drive
Of course, they still met their demise
28. Oakland Raiders
To say JaMarcus Russell has no game
Is like saying Al Davis is insane
While both are clear facts
They're understatements to the max
I can't begin to describe Oakland's pain
27. Buffalo Bills
Oh sorry, I was just counting sheep
Thinking about Bills-Browns put me to sleep
Marshawn Lynch is back
But where's the rushing attack?
Dick Jauron's standing in a hole, and it's deep
26. Tennessee Titans
What exactly happened here?
This team collapsed in less than a year
Outside of one game
Even Chris Johnson's been tame
Maybe LenDale should ditch beer
25. Cleveland Browns
Another team that's a complete mess
The QB situation is a total distress
No need to put out the feelers
This team won't beat the Steelers
Eric Mangini is failing to impress
24. Detroit Lions
Without their stars, the Lions played tough
In Detroit, you have to appreciate the small stuff
This team needs Stafford and Johnson
To stand a chance in Wisconsin
If they don't, things could get rough
23. Carolina Panthers
If not for the comeback against the 'Skins
The Panthers wouldn't have any wins
This team needs to run the ball
Or the offense will stall
Although the Bucs next week should spark grins
22. Houston Texans
This team will never be stunning
If Steve Slaton can't hit the ground running
The Texans will likely falter
But with Johnson, Daniels and Walter
Matt Schaub will just keep on shotgunning
21. Jacksonville Jaguars
Who can figure the Jaguars out?
A week ago, they seemed to have clout.
But after being shutout at Seattle
Jacksonville is 2-3 and rattled
Although the Rams should be an easy bout
20. Dallas Cowboys
The Miles Austin show was great
But the Cowboys' wins don't hold any weight
Plus former players are a huge distraction
Criticizing Romo for media reaction
At best, this team finishes 8-8
19. Seattle Seahawks
Seattle's taken a few on the chin
But the Seahawks also know how to win
They're 0-3 with Seneca Wallace
With Hasselbeck, they're flawless.
Plus, the schedule ahead looks mighty thin
18. Arizona Cardinals
The Cards' defense has been sufficient
It's the offense that's inefficient
Although Fitzgerald looks grand
And the defense had a goal-line stand
I just question if Kurt Warner's all that omniscient
17. Miami Dolphins
Miami has a tough schedule ahead
Saints-Jets-Pats means this team could be dead
But on Monday night they showed heart
And for now that sets them apart
Well, that and that Wildcat spread
16. Green Bay Packers
Aaron Rodgers has a reason to be tense
As no QB can win with a horrid defense
The Packers give up big plays
And Ryan Grant can no longer amaze
Let the countdown to Favre II commence!
15. San Francisco 49ers
The Atlanta smackdown felt like a bad dream
Roddy White made 'Niners fans scream
Singletary is very respected
He needs to get his team collected
Blowout losses can't become a running theme
14. San Diego Chargers
Rivers to Jackson is the next big thing
But with no ground game, this team has no zing
Sproles is a fast learner
But he's limited by Norv Turner
A win over Denver would be a huge swing
13. Philadelphia Eagles
McNabb's health looks just fine
Plus Jeremy Maclin? Simply divine.
Wash and Oak won't be tough
But then the schedule gets rough
I'm just not convinced this team has the spine
12. Pittsburgh Steelers
The Steelers don't seem quite right
With Troy P. out, they're missing some fight
The schedule hasn't been easy
A win over the Browns should be breezy
Those receivers always excite
11. Chicago Bears
Against the Bears, opposing kickers choke
Although Cutler and Co. are no joke
The next two games will be a test
Cincy and Atlanta are two of the best
Matt Forte needs to run for broke
10. Baltimore Ravens
An offense that used to bore
Now has several ways to score
Ray Lewis is still a terror
But that hit was a dumb error
The Vikings are in the way of win No. 4
9. New York Jets
Monday night was a tough one to lose
And the AFC East is no cruise
But you don't need great skills
To beat the Raiders and Bills
5-2 is in Jets fans' views
8. New England Patriots
One second this team looks of old
The next, the play calling is far from bold
I think they'll take to the air
And go on a tear
New England's tough when the weather is cold
7. Atlanta Falcons
Just when Flacco was getting the attention
Ryan showed he's no honorable mention
No sophomore slump here
Plus Turner's hitting high gear
I sense a power ranking ascension
6. New York Giants
Giants fans are probably feeling cheated
But look at who this team has defeated
Bucs and Chiefs -- a breeze
Raiders and 'Skins -- please
If they beat the Saints, these rankings may get deleted
5. Minnesota Vikings
The Vikings defense has astounded
Ask the Rams...they just got pounded
Despite the 40-year-old aches
Favre's avoided mistakes
So this team looks very well-rounded
4. Cincinnati Bengals
4-1 Bengals...who would have thought?
On "Hard Knocks" they looked so distraught
Ochocinco survived the collision
The team's atop the division
Cedric Benson's improved...a lot
3. Denver Broncos
Only in my wildest dreams
Did I see the Broncos beating good teams
Brandon Marshall's done pouting
So I'm done doubting
And Moreno's for real, it seems
2. New Orleans Saints
This offense is much to behold
And they still win when Brees goes cold
The defense stacks the box
Pierre Thomas rocks
Can't wait for the Giants game to unfold
1. Indianapolis Colts
Gonzo's injury hasn't been distressing
Manning still has defenses guessing
Indy remains jolly
And I like Austin Collie
My fantasy team's without Manning. Depressing.
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