Five Things I Hate About College Football

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Five Things I Hate About College Football
(Photo by Otto Greule Jr/Getty Images)

So here I sit just 17 days away from kick-off. I get excited just thinking about the Georgia Bulldogs and the Oklahoma State Cowboys going at it in Stillwater. The smell of football is in the air.

College teams are hard at work, High school coaches are busy preparing for the first game under the Friday night lights. Even the pro players are grunting and sweating as they move ever closer to that first real game of thw new season.

So what could possibly possess me to sit down and tell you what I "hate" about college football?

There are not many things on the list. Only five or six. Maybe seven or eight if you really press me. The good outweighs the bad no doubt.

I would think that many of you, unless you fall into one of these categories, would probably agree with some of them, if not all. Some are out of our control, others are just out of control.

You will see what I mean. So in no particular order, let's proceed.

 

1) The Really Loud Talker who knows it all

Sound familiar? When I take my seat at Sanford Stadium in Athens each year, I already know where this guys sits. He just happens to be about three rows directly behind me. I believe this guy would complain about just about anything. Yes, he is passionate about his team. But his reasoning is flawed, his knowledge seems limited and his mouth is loud.

So we all get to hear: The starter at running back is the wrong guy. The quarterback is terrible. The defense couldn't stop a pee-wee team. The Coach can't call plays.

Fill in the blank... I'm sure you have one of these guys sitting around you. All of that, and the game hasn't even started yet!

I don't want to pick on this guy. I'm sure he contributes to the University. He is probably a life long fan. But please, if you just happen to be with him, do us all a favor and tell him to just "SHUT UP!!"

 

2) The Obnoxious Drunk

You may run into many of these on game day. They come in all sizes, shapes, gender and fan base. If you are lucky and you have the early kick-off, you may not see as many. But if you are waiting on a late afternoon kick-off, or even worse the good old ESPN, 8pm start, you may as well get ready.

They will stumble, they will slur their words, they will pass out (if you are lucky). Many will try to drive themselves home and some end up sleeping it off at the county lock-up after stripping off their clothes and sprinting across the field.

The sad thing is... many of these individuals paid good money for their seats and come morning, they won't even remember the score.

So just a word to this obnoxious drunk sports fan. If at possible please keep it to a minimum and let the rest of us enjoy the game.

 

3) The Knows Nothing About Your Team Announcer

This guy you only encounter when you stay at home to watch the game. Chances are he will be all dressed up and looking good. He will have all the credentials. He may be an ex-jock who once was an All-Pro. But when it comes to your team, he seems to know nothing.

You will try to help this guy. You will correct him when he tells you that Stafford is a Senior (no.. he was a junior last year), or when he refers to freshman (he's a sophomore) running back Richard Samuels (it's Samuel, no "s", gee how many times do I have to tell you)...

At first you just smile and shake your head. But come the fourth quarter, you are shouting at the TV! This guy is worse than Lou Holtz... You admit you exaggerate, no one could be as bad as Lou, but it makes you feel better still.

As the number of broadcast increase every year, it will only get worse. This guy is here to stay. So just grin and bear it.

 

4) That Fan of the Team we just never seem to beat

Care to name them? For UGA it is pretty simple.

Florida is that team we just never seem to beat. I can say it. I'm a big boy. But I have to admit when I see a Florida fan coming, I usually turn the other way.

Tebow will graduate and move on... at least I hope he will. Urban will get a big contract offer and move to South Bend. Spurrier will come back and.... no, scratch that one.

I'm sure UGA will eventually string a few wins together against the dreaded Gators. Georgia Tech fans hope this is year they finally get back to back wins against the Dawgs. Alabama finally gets to brag that they beat Auburn.

The list goes on and on. That fan is everywhere... you know who you are.

If you don't have one of these fans hounding you season after season, you will eventually. So be nice. Because what goes around, comes around. Or so they say.

 

5) The West Coast game

This one is kind of a love hate relationship. At night when I check to see who the "late" game is, I'm all excited. Come Sunday morning when its time to get up and head to church it's more like... what was I thinking?

ESPN, Fox and all the cable networks provide us with any number of games every Saturday. Great match-ups from noon till the wee hours of the morning. Thursday and Friday have been added to the mix as well. So many games, so little time.

So you make yourself look and guess what? Boise State plays Fresno at 10:30. Hawaii is at UCLA this week. USC is playing San Francisco Tech at 11pm EST... How can I not stay up and watch?

So try as I may to hate the West coast game, I must admit I do love them all on Saturday night... But on Sunday morning how I hate myself, and the network that brought those games to me!!

 

So how about it? Did I miss anything? Please add what you "hate" about college football. Of course we all know the love outweighs the hate any day!!

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