Just when you thought every scenario imaginable leading to a positive drug test had been exhausted...tennis star Richard Gasquet tests positive for cocaine based on...a kiss?
Today the International Tennis Federation found that Gasquet's positive cocaine test was a result of kissing a woman named “Pamela” at a nightclub in Miami.
Apparently, Gasquet went to a nightclub to see a French DJ perform. In the course of the night he kissed a woman he didn't know, or had only recently met.
The short of the story is that he kissed a woman who had used cocaine. She had it on her lips or in her system and passed it along to him.
As strange and unlikely as this may sound, the courts found this to be true.
An independent tribunal noted that "We take into account that the amount of cocaine in the player's body was so small that if he had been tested only a few hours later, his test result would be likely to have been negative." (ESPN)
Gasquet was sentenced to a retroactive ban of two and a half months and was cleared to play as of Wednesday morning.
In a day and age where seemingly every day we hear of another athlete testing positive for a banned substance, along with every possible excuse, reason, and explanation, this one just might take the cake.
What is next? Is someone going to test positive after touching a handrail at a crowded mall?
Will someone say that fibers in their pillow somehow caused a “false-positive” test result?
I can't even imagine where this leaves us. I can't imagine what is next. I can't believe what this has come to.