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Hottest Stories in Sports for Monday, Oct. 24

Gabe ZaldivarOct 23, 2011

The Texas Rangers managed to tie up Albert Pujols, Tim Tebow overthrew a bunch of receivers but is still being revered, and the BCS Rankings are back to irritate us all. 

Welcome to the Daily Radar, the best method of procrastination yet. Check back often for new stories and some naughty tid bits left in the comment section. 

Let's Dish. 

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1. WORLD SERIES IS GETTING GOOD

A day after Albert Pujols took batting practice all over the Rangers' pitching staff, he was being silenced by Derek Holland, a man with a 12-year-old's moustache. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: Who benefits from best-of-three series?

Our Take: With the series tied at two games a piece, I have to like the Cardinals' chances. They have the better overall pitching, but this is going to be a photo finish. The real winners are the fans that only have to put up with the ridiculously hackneyed announcing of Joe Buck and Tim McCarver for three more games. 

Hype Meter: 5-out-5 Adam Morrison has the Same Moustaches 

Instead of watching Derek Holland pitch a masterful game while he continues to grow peach fuzz, the nation was watching the Colts get embarrassed for a couple of hours instead. I just don't understand this country sometimes. 

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2. TIM TEBOW SINGLEHANDEDLY BEATS WORST TEAM IN NFL HISTORY

Okay, a little hyperbole on my part. The Dolphins are not the worst team ever. However, if the media is going to act like Tebow's average performance on Sunday is equivalent to a Super Bowl win, I am going to take some liberties as well. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: Is Tim Tebow the answer?

Our Take: Allen Iverson is the Answer. Tebow is a one-dimensional quarterback that overthrew a few wide-open receivers Sunday. Magically, he completed a couple passes late to seal the win. Chaos and hype ensued. 

Hype Meter: 5-out-5 Matt Leinart Could Beat the Dolphins

This game will be treated like Greek Mythology. There will be a number of various takes on the story, but they will all mean the same thing. Tebow is a winner. Tebow gets the job done. Tebow has big muscles and can fart the theme song to Bosom Buddies. 

You Said It Tweet Award of Night: 

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3. BCS RANKINGS RELEASED, FANS LOSE THEIR MINDS 

The BCS Rankings were released once again on Sunday night, and most of it was as expected as a Rick Reilly joke. However, fans have found a lot to be angry about in the latest edition, perspective be damned.

Question on Everybody's Mind: Can we trust this week's BCS polls?

Our Take: Many will find issues with Oklahoma staying in the top 10 with plenty of teams and time to make a return to the BCS title game picture. But I have to state once again that I hate this computer-driven madness. This is the only sport that is determined by a formula. Yet we wonder why none of the decisions sit well with us. 

Hype Meter: 4-out-5 SIRI, Please Define Getting Shafted

I can't get too riled up considering what we have in store November 5th. I could give two flying shenanigans about the other teams. All I care about is that the No. 1 and No. 2 teams in the nation will battle in two weeks. After that, I will consider the BCS title game moot. 

Related Link:  CBS Sports Breaks Down BCS Rankings (CBS Sports)

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4. COLTS GET PANTS PULLED DOWN IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY

If you are going to get embarrassed, do it in a back alley somewhere. Don't do it on national TV like the Indianapolis Colts did on Sunday Night Football. The Saints basically grabbed the Colts by the neck and gave them noogies for four straight quarters. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: Are the Colts done for the season?

Our Take: Oh god yes. I am having a hard time trying to figure our who is worse; the Colts, Rams or Dolphins. It is sort of like picking your favorite Hanson brother. You could offer an opinion, but you just waste your time in the endeavor.

Hype Meter: 3-out-5 Mmm Bops

The race to 0-16 is heating up, and I am very excited. Who will be the first team to screw up and accidentally win? I keep biting my lip from the excitement. 

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5. IT CAME FROM EUROPE ...

Manchester United was beat within an inch of their lives by Derby rivals Manchester City on Sunday. I know most of you lost interest at Manchester, so I'll speak in terms you can relate to. This is like the Red Sox beating the Yankees 20-0, but, like, with more emotion and flopping. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: Are the City boys the real deal? 

Our Take: Manchester City proves that with a lot of hard work and billions of dollars, you can trump proud tradition. There is now Manchester City and everyone else atop the EPL.

Hype Meter: 3-out-5 Hand Balls

This story should be front page news. Sadly, we will spend more time talking about how Drew Brees went straight Tecmo Bowl on the Colts Sunday. Why are you afraid of Soccer, America?

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6. AARON RODGERS GOES AARON RODGERS ON VIKINGS 

How is this for being silly? Aaron Rodgers was stupid dope sick on Sunday, and Tim Tebow will get the bulk of the talking points. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: Is Aaron Rodgers the best in the biz?

Our Take: Aaron Rodgers is everything I want to be when I grow up, and I happen to be older than he is. So, yes. I think he is without a doubt the best in the game. 

Hype Meter: 2-out-5 Discount Double Checks 

Watching Aaron Rodgers on Sunday, I was in awe. I can't stress how idiotic it is that we spend most of Monday discussing Tim Tebow in what was a far inferior performance. This would be comparing Teen Wolf to Teen Wolf Too. Tebow is obviously Teen Wolf Too. 

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a name="sparano">7. TONY SPARANO BEGS OFFICIAL FOR REPLAY TO SAVE HIS JOB

Have we reached a point where we feel sorry for Tony Sparano? As if blowing a 15-point lead in the final three minutes isn't bad enough, he is begging the referees to look closely at plays to make sure that the call is right otherwise he is screwed. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: Why hasn't Tony Sparano been fired yet?

Our Take: Conventional wisdom will tell you that midseason changes never work, but perhaps the Dolphins are so enamored with Stanford QB Andrew Luck that they will do anything they can to ensure that they suck more than any other team in order to land the prize prospect in the 2012 NFL Draft. 

Hype Meter: 3-out-of-6 Sopranos Seasons on DVD

The Dolphins are quite painful to watch, and there is no excuse for blowing a lead at home to a terrible Broncos team. Tim Tebow is going to get all the credit for the win, but Sparano's coaching decisions gave the game away. 

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a name="kiss">8. TIM TEBOW AND DEMARYIUS THOMAS SEAL DENVER VICTORY WITH A KISS

Tim Tebow's first win of the 2011 season did not come easily, but when it was over he celebrated with a lip-peck of wide receiver Demaryius Thomas. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: Will New Celebration Make Broncos Any Better On The Field?

Our Take: It is nice that Tebow is forging close relationships with his teammates, but the fact of the matter is the team is terrible. No matter how much chemistry they have, there is no way that they will win more than five games this season. 

Hype Meter: 5-out-of-5 Tim Tebow Jerseys

Any time that Tebow is involved, a story becomes a much bigger deal than it should. There are analysts that actually give him credit for the win over the Dolphins despite the fact that he was terrible for 54 minutes. 

Related Link: Tim Tebow Does His Best John Elway Impression (Denver Post) 

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a name="bush">9. REGGIE BUSH TAKES WORDS OUT OF MY MOUTH 

I was just about to say the Dolphins stink, then Reggie Bush took the words right out of my mouth. The running back who also spends time playing injured on the sidelines just ripped his team, and he ripped 'em good. 

Question on Everybody's Mind: How could he say such things?

Our Take: I find nothing wrong with what Reggie Bush said. The only way this hurts his team is if they had not already hit rock bottom. You can't make something suck any less. I think it's a theorem that top scientists are currently working on. 

Hype Meter: 1-out-5 Flippers Crying 

This will make about a dozen people in South Beach mad. Everyone else is too busy buying Tebow jerseys online. 

Related Link: Palm Beach Post Reports on Bush's Bashing (Palm Beach Post)

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Until tomorrow, Do the Wolf Dance. 

Ohtani Little League HR 😨

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