Dear old Alex Ferguson, he cannot seem to get his head around football nowadays.
His team is perhaps going to win another Premier League title this season, making United the winning most team in the English top division with 19 titles in total, overtaking the long standing record that United currently share with Liverpool.
When Fergie joined United, what seems like a lifetime ago, United were most definitely NOT top dogs in English football.
Their attendances were not massive, their stadium not that great and at the time, the team to be was Liverpool; they had many more league titles and many, many more European Cup wins under their belts.
Fergie famously muttered that he wanted to "knock Liverpool off their perch."
Job done there Alex—United are comfortably the best best of the last 20 years.
But the world moves on and there is another kid on the block now and it seems to have you rather discombobulated.
I suspect you never expected City to be the richest club in the world—I know I didn't.
I suspect also that you never thought you would lose many hours sleep worrying about how best to handle the club over the border in Manchester.
But it seems that not only is Alex Ferguson struggling with the current situation, but the whole of United are.
Cheap digs about noisy neighbours and about City not being bigger than United "in my lifetime" prove two things: Firstly, that Fergie is very worried about the club from Manchester and secondly, that he has no idea what to do.
There seems little or no chance that Fergie will develop humility or learn to be a good loser, so the next few months and certainly years are going to be very interesting.
But here are a few things that will happen and Fergie's most likely public utterances:
Manchester City win the FA Cup - "Ahh well good luck to them but of course its the League that we all want."
Manchester City qualify for the Champions League - "Ahh well good luck to them but it's not as if they have won it now is it?"
Manchester City Win the League - "Ahh well, good luck to them but that puts them on three so they have a long way to go to catch MY Manchester United."
Manchester City Win the League again - "Ahh well, I suppose they are getting there but they will never be United"
Manchester City win Champions League - "Its a big achievement for any club but for a club like City it's even bigger."
Manchester City win League and Champions League Double - "I have nothing to say about that."
The year is now 2015 and Manchester City have racked up three league titles, two FA cup wins and are readying themselves for a fourth consecutive Champions League final (having won it three times already) - "I don't want to answer any more bloody questions about Manchester F*****g City!"
City win their fourth Champions League trophy bettering United's record - "Get ti fu.**"
Perhaps that's a touch quicker than it will happen, perhaps not, but one thing is certain: The folks over in Trafford, Liverpool, Kensington and Ashburton Grove are going to have to think long and hard about how they answer questions about City.
And top of that list is the man from another age, Alex Ferguson.
My advice would be for him to learn how to be nice, be a good loser or retire sooner rather than later.