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The NFL's Worst Teams Week Two: The Sad Sack Seven

Dan BooneSenior Analyst ISeptember 15, 2010

LOS ANGELES - FEBRUARY 12:  (US TABS OUT; HOLLYWOOD REPORTER OUT) Singer Jessica Simpson performs during the 'Rewarding Life of Earvin (Magic) Johnson' tribute presented by American Express on February 12, 2004 in Los Angeles, California. The event kicked off the NBA All-Star 2004 Entertainment weekend.  (Photo by Vince Bucci/Getty Images)
Vince Bucci/Getty Images

Some football teams flounder early, some flounder late, some flounder and fail both early and late, and its always bad to drop the ball out of the gate.

Some teams, and coaches, always seem to start sad and bad.

Some teams stay bad for decades.

In week who is the worst team?

1] Football by the Bay [0-2]

Oakland Raiders and San Francisco 49ers.

The 49ers' staff looked like they were coaching during the first few minutes of the Great San Francisco Earthquake.

Panic, disorder, late plays, bad plays, penalties, confusion, broken communication devices, broken pass plays, and all that dismal jazz is just another game day in Raider Land but to see their brothers across the Bay join in a moment of solidarity was heart warming. 

It's quite an accomplishment to take a team through weeks of raining camp and still be a total team train wrecks in week one like both bad Bays.

2] Football in Ohio [0-2]

The Bungles picked up right where they left off against the Jets in last year's playoff wipe out....ineffective, confused, and often times frightened.

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That Double Jack Ass, TO and Ocho, set has yet to bear fruit. Fear not Bungles Randy Moss will be ready for the Triple Jack Ass Attack next year.

The Man of Magic, Mangini, has produced another boring, bad Brown clown show. Still losing to the listless Buccaneers was just the first song in a sad set playing in Cleveland all season long.

How's this for a magic trick? Bedazzled teams have paid turnover machine Jake Delhomme $20 million over the past two season.

3] San Diego Chargers

Norv Turner's plan works like clockwork...start the season poorly prepared and badly beaten, make mid-season surge, and finally an early play off exit.

Some quarterbacks react well to adversity other act like spoiled small children. See Phil Rivers screaming at his teammates, pouting on the sideline, and trying to angrily kick a fumbled snap..all after another Rivers bad pass.

4] Dallas Cowboys

Poor Wade Phillips, the captain of the doomed Dallas ship, is destined to be dangled and then dunked by Jerry Jones at the end of another Super Bowl short season.

The next coach will still have Tony Romo though, who might just be the next Gary Hogenboom in Dallas.

5] New York Jets

Instead of making a Reality HBO Show, arguing with Tony "Church Lady" Dungy about bad words, babbling endlessly about Revis, guaranteeing Super Bowls, harassing hot Mexican reporters,and giving long stories to the Sunday New York Times magazine maybe Rex Ryan could have designed a successful play to run on 3 and 8?

Just one?

If Bill Belichick bashes Sexy Ryan watch the Rexinburgh begin to ignite.  

6] Denver Broncos

Folks are beginning to wonder if Josh McDaniels is Al Davis' ultimate revenge on the Broncos.

Is McDaniels really a Raider sleeper cell coach sent, pre-programmed by the Silver and Black, to devastate Denver for decades?

Is he an Al Davis Doomsday Device? If Oakland falls at least Denver too will be left in ruins?

7] Buffalo Bills

What to say about this incredibly bad bunch of Bills? They are perhaps the most uninspiring team in any sport.

They can't run, pass, or block other than that the offense is coming along fine.

It must be boring in Buffalo to drop big bucks to see these mutts. 

Whiner of the week

Randy Moss

Wobblies of the Week

Solidarity

Terry Bradshaw Network

Doc Anderson

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