Ranking the Premier League Managers by Their Sense of Humour
With the Liverpool Echo's Kristian Walsh reporting that Jurgen Klopp is all but confirmed as the new Liverpool boss, the Premier League's managers' alliance is set to gain a real character.
But while most have spent the past 48 hours focusing on what effect the 48-year-old will have at Anfield and how high he can push the Reds up the table, many have overlooked the impact his personality will have on the Premier League.
Managing a club in the top flight can be a tough job at (most) times, but there are a fair few whose wit shines through.
We've compiled a list of the remaining 18 managers and compared their senses of humour to Klopp's. But will he slot immediately into the No. 1 spot?
19. Mark Hughes (Stoke City)
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Were Dick Advocaat still around, Hughes might have had competition here.
An apparent lack of Mark Hughes ever saying anything remotely funny is fairly inexcusable given his decade of Premier League experience, so he earns the wooden spoon in the rankings. Come on Mark, lighten up.
18. Alex Neil (Norwich City)
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Up next it's one of the new boys. It's still early days, but Alex Neil has yet to send reporters into fits of laughter.
He was barely jumping with glee during his post-match interview after guiding the Canaries back to the Premier League last season.
Unfortunately for the dry Scotsman, not even others' attempts to highlight his "wisecracks and humour" have shown him off as particularly funny.
We can forgive him, though, he's got a few more important things to worry about than joking around.
17. Eddie Howe (Bournemouth)
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Eddie Howe has done wonders for Bournemouth, no doubt. But he's definitely not the life of the party—at least not yet, nor when the cameras are on.
One of the most likeable and respected managers in the Premier League, but he's certainly not matching Klopp for character.
A bit of a trend emerging among the new boys...
16. Slaven Bilic (West Ham United)
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It takes a fairly brave man to return to coach in England after being critical of the national side in the past.
So, for his sake, we hope he has a sense of humour, too.
In his short time at West Ham, the former Croatia manager has taken the "park the bus" analogy and run with it.
15. Garry Monk (Swansea City)
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Garry Monk might be appreciated by critics around the land, but the Swansea City manager has yet to register a particularly hilarious moment during his two years managing the South Wales outfit.
However, his plan to deal with Peter Crouch caught the eye (or is disturbing, depending on how you look at it), per WalesOnline (via FourFourTwo): "Get a ladder. Chop his legs off. Kick him."
14. Quique Sanchez Flores (Watford)
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Quique Sanchez Flores' tenure in the Premier League has been fleeting so far, but the Watford boss has promised to perform an Elton John song if the Hornets stay up.
So maybe his position in the rankings might be a little higher in May after a bit of karaoke...
13. Manuel Pellegrini (Manchester City)
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More known for being regularly linked with unemployment than his joking about, league-leading Manuel Pellegrini shared a rare moment of humour earlier this season.
Asked about his good mood after Manchester City's unbeaten start to the season, the Chilean told reporters: "For a dead man walking, not bad."
12. Mauricio Pochettino (Tottenham Hotspur)
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Mauricio Pochettino's funniest moments have come when he wasn't exactly trying to be funny.
In 2014 he had this brilliant response to Jose Mourinho, and while at Southampton he had the pleasure of explaining, via a translator, an injury that will make you wince.
11. Tony Pulis (West Brom)
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The West Brom boss showed his funny side when he was the victim of a prank call from "Neil Lennon" last year.
But it seems Pulis took it in good humour...
10. Steve McClaren (Newcastle)
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Steve McClaren once put on a Dutch accent while coaching in the Netherlands, and given his league position, he could use a bit of a moral victory.
We can forgive him a fairly dry first two months of the season and know he has a knack for the one liner after a slight dig at Sir Alex Ferguson a few years back.
Maybe his sense of humour is most obvious in this quote to reporters when appointed England manager:
"I am results-orientated and I'm here to do a job, win matches and make sure England over the next four years win a major trophy."
9. Tim Sherwood (Aston Villa)
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If you have a heart, it's hard to feel anything for Tim Sherwood other than sympathy.
A man who opens an interview with the BBC by stating he "never felt this bad" is difficult to laugh at, but away from the heat of the battle, the Villa boss has his moments.
He awkwardly joked to reporters last month after suffering an injury kicking a water bottle in a fit of rage and called a vocal supporter from the stands to replace him on the touchline during his under-fire final months at Spurs.
8. Arsene Wenger (Arsenal)
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Arsene Wenger's more memorable quotes come from his long-running rivalry with Jose Mourinho, but Ray Parlour spoke of the Frenchman's sense of humour on Soccer AM earlier this year.
As Parlour was dealing with the financial ramifications of going through a divorce from his wife, Wenger asked the midfielder: "I saved your career as well, where's my 40 percent?"
7. Jose Mourinho (Chelsea)
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It's difficult not to judge Jose Mourinho's comedic value on the events of the past two months (which have, of course, included the infamous implementation of a "Banter Ban," according to the Telegraph's Matt Law), but the Special One has quite the way with words.
Among describing Arsene Wenger as a "specialist in failure" to reporters, the Portuguese's speech at Chelsea's Player of the Year awards last season brilliantly took aim at the tactics of his rivals, and he once described an injury crisis this way, per the Telegraph:
"It's like having a blanket that is too small for the bed. You pull the blanket up to keep your chest warm and your feet stick out. I cannot buy a bigger blanket because the supermarket is closed. But the blanket is made of cashmere.
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6. Roberto Martinez (Everton)
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Though the headlines did him no favours, earlier this season Roberto Martinez joked about Romelu Lukaku's wayward shooting during warm-ups.
He has previously laughed at the expense of the photographer who made Aaron Lennon look so chuffed about his move to Goodison Park and admitted that he sang the "Money Can't Buy You Stones" song in the shower during Chelsea's pursuit of his centre-back, according to the Mirror's Liam Corless.
5. Louis Van Gaal (Manchester United)
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It's difficult to tell whether you're supposed to laugh at or be scared of Louis van Gaal.
His delivery of his own "Louis van Gaal's Army" chant is excellent, and his speech during last year's Manchester United Player of the Year Awards was equal parts hilarious and terrifying.
4. Ronald Koeman (Southampton)
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It's still unclear whether or not he actually meant to be funny, but Ronald Koeman's tweet from Southampton training while operating with a severely thin squad last season was perfect in its delivery.
The Dutchman has also shrugged off criticism from Mauricio Pochettino by thanking him politely for the squad he adopted and is the unofficial spokesperson for mayonnaise and chips.
3. Claudio Ranieri (Leicester City)
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Claudio Ranieiri once described himself as a "crazy man," according to the Leicester Mercury.
Another whose good humour could well be attributed to his side's form in the league, the Italian recently made headlines for offering pizza in exchange for clean sheets.
2. Jurgen Klopp (Liverpool?)
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Well, there you go. Just pipped at the line.
If Jurgen Klopp does take over at Liverpool, he can take some comfort in second spot in our rankings, though he won't be satisfied with that.
Here are some of the eccentric German's finest moments, thanks to the Daily Star's Alex Harris:
"Klopp on... Mario Gotze's departure to Pep Guardiola's Bayern Munich: "If it's anyone's fault, it's mine. I can't make myself shorter and learn Spanish."
Klopp on... beating Bayern in their backyard for the first time in ages: "When BVB last won here, most of my players were still being breastfed."
Klopp on... competing with Bayern: "We have a bow and arrow and if we aim well, we can hit the target. The problem is that Bayern has a bazooka. But then apparently Robin Hood was quite successful."
Klopp on... being asked by a fan how to win the Bundesliga: "How do you explain to a blind person what colour is?"
Klopp on... rumours Mats Hummels was joining United: "If that's not a b******* story, I'll eat a broom stick."
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1. Alan Pardew (Crystal Palace)
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So it's the Crystal Palace boss who beats Klopp to No. 1.
Alan Pardew would have every right not to be funny, given his push-and-shove, swear-laden and headbutt-y past. But it seems Crystal Palace's flying start to the Premier League season has brought out his subtle yet excellent sense of humour.
This season alone he has commended the champions Chelsea for having, in the words of a PremierLeague.com report, "played their part" in a match at Stamford Bridge and asserted to the media that fellow Londoners Tottenham Hotspur "will definitely finish in the top 10."
Then, of course, there are his touchline antics and holiday photos.
