Movie Villains We'd Rather See as NFL Commissioner Than Roger Goodell

Warning: Humor

Roger Goodell isn't the most popular man in America these days, especially down near the Bayou. He has many detractors—many of which have valid cases for their displeasure. 

Bleacher Report's own Ty Schalter has recently written a compelling series of posts chronicling some of these reasons, one of which I highly recommend: Why the NFL Hasn't Taken Any Real Steps Toward Player Safety.

Schalter took a serious approach to a serious subject.

That being said, I thought I would look at it from another perspective.

I decided it would be fun to explore evil movie characters who we'd rather see as NFL commissioner than Mr. Goodell given his recent plunge in the ratings—not that he was ever that popular with fans.

HAL 9000 (2001: A Space Odyssey)

Hal 9000 is a logical, cold machine that couldn't possibly do anything to hurt the game we know and love.

I'm positive the NFL would be secure for centuries to come with Hal at the reins. 

Gordon Gekko (Wall Street)

If you thought Roger Goodell was out to make a buck, you haven't seen anything yet.

Wall Street's Gordon Gekko would squeeze every last cent out of our pockets, and we'd probably thank him for it.

The man is a financial genius—just don't ask him how he does it.

Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter)

Some people think Roger Goodell is evil, but they can't prove it. 

At least with Lord Voldemort you know what you're getting. He's really evil, so you know the ban on helmet-to-helmet hits would be lifted, and we would get to see the Colt McCoys of this world get blasted from week to week...

Of course, you know I'm just kidding around here, right?

Michael Corleone (The Godfather)

The Godfather would run a tight ship, of that you can be certain. 

As long as everyone played by the rules, there wouldn't be anything to worry about. 

Peyton, please step into my office...I heard you don't wanna go to San Francisco...I'm thinking you should. 

Batta boom! 

The NFL is fixed.

Darth Vader (Star Wars)

Behind that cold, dark mask are a pair of eyes that once burned brightly for justice.

I know one thing for sure: The negotiations at the bargaining table this past summer would have gone a bit differently if Darth Vader were sitting across from DeMaurice Smith instead of Roger Goodell.

Vader, though twisted in both body and mind, still has a soft spot for doing what's right. He would surely rule the NFL with an iron fist, but in the end, he always looks out for the needs of his loved ones.

The balance of the force would once again rule the galaxy.

The Terminator

Sure, the Terminator has a wild side and can be a bit reckless at times, but if he can become the Governor of the State of California, I'm sure he can handle a bunch of wussy athletes.

Besides, then the commish could brand himself and sell sweet Terminator shades with your favorite team's logo on them.

Dr. Evil (Austin Powers)

If players thought Roger Goodell was tough on them, they haven't seen anything yet.

You don't want to mess with Dr. Evil. I heard he has a tank in his office with frickin' sharks with frickin' lasers on their frickin' heads.

He would clean up the league in no time.

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