Pro Wrestling: 3 Reasons Why My Mom Hates Wrestling

I have just journeyed back from a family reunion in upstate NY with breaking news: My mom hates wrestling!

Shocking, I know.

This breaking news was discovered when my family had been informed that I had the power and privilege of writing for the Bleacher Report.

"What's the Bleacher Report?" I was asked.

"Only the fourth largest sports media website in the U.S., which reaches over 20 million readers a month." I proudly proclaimed.

"What do you write about?...The New York Giants, Yankees, Knicks?" My family inquired.

... "Pro Wrestling" I said as a smile crept across my face.

Laughter and the sound of rolling eyes filled the room.

"You and your wrestling." my mother was heard saying through the laughter. "I hate Wrestling! Always did, and always will."

And with her self proclaimed declaration of hate, the proverbial light bulb went off in my head. This woman represents, I feel, the majority of the public's view on professional wrestling. She represents the masses who don't like, don't understand, don't appreciate and generally despise the art of professional wrestling. 

I view wrestling as an art form. A way of telling a well crafted story. A way of pure entertainment that can't be found anywhere else. A combination of music, film and literature all to choreographed movement. 

But not everyone shares the same view on wrestling that I do... 

I sat down with this representative, my mother, and started to pick her brain for the reasons why she hated wrestling. 

To her credit, she never once uttered the words fake, scripted or dangerous. However, the word stupid was used on more then one occasion.

During this sit-down, I was able to compile a list of three in-depth reasons why she hated wrestling. 

And without further ado, here is the list: 3 Reasons Why My Mom Hates Wrestling.

Reason 1: It Prompted Backyard Wreslting

Well, that's certainty fair enough.

When I first started watching wrestling at the age of 14 (the apex of the "Attitude Era" from 1999-2001), I was hooked. I watched every week, had action figures, went to live events and even started my own backyard wrestling promotion.

We didn't do anything too crazy (not like the idiots pictured), but we used our fair share of TV trays, folding chairs, wiffle ball bats, golf clubs, Styrofoam tables, ladders and mattress beds. We would meet every school vacation day, snow day and any other time my parents weren't home and would unleash hell throughout the house.

There were eight of us, and the "Gullo Arena" was our Impact Zone. We would meet at 8 a.m., script shows before hand, tape them, order a pizza or eat my parents out of house and home, replay the carnage on the TV, laugh a lot and then go our separate ways all before 5 p.m. rolled around. It was a full time job!

My parents would always wonder and question why the TV trays were bent and damaged, why the beds were always a little messed up, where all the food went and why there was a ladder left out by the shed (oops!).

All of their questions were answered when they went to watch my little sister's basketball state  championship game they had taped for my grandparents. I had accidentally used that same tape to record our wrestling shenanigans.

Hilarious now...not so much back then.

That effectively ended the "Gullo Arena" and my backyard wrestling promotion. Good times, though! 

Reason 2: Art? Are You out of Your Mind?

How can something that has been labeled as nothing more then red-neck, low class, dumb minded, often sleazy, often profane and ridiculous entertainment be classified in the same category with Leonardo Da Vinci, Mozart, Clapton and Scorsese?

I would dare to say it is.

My mom does not see it this way. She simply sees it, like most do, for what is displayed on the television screen. She has not witnessed Shawn Michaels take on the Undertaker at Wrestlemania, she did not bear witness to CM Punk and his ongoing opus against the WWE and John Cena and she certainly did not see Stone Cold and the masterful storytelling and beautiful carnage he spread in the late 90's.

She sees it for steroid injected monsters who body slam each other, violently bleed (fake or not), the  scantily clad women who subjected themselves to the eyes and cat-calls of the fans at home and in the arenas, the flipping of a middle finger, men chopping at their crotches and the sight of someone being impaled in the face by a steel chair.

While these things do not happen in today's wrestling world as often as they once did, thanks to a move I think doesn't get the credit it deserves (the move to TV-PG), it is all she knows and chooses to see of professional wrestling.

She will admit to and commend the hard work these men give to their craft, but does not see the beauty it creates amongst the chaos that comes with it. The soap-opera like stories it tells through wonderfully choreographed "dance," the battles of good versus evil and the ride the audience is taken on during each contest.

Maybe I romanticize it too much, but we who love wrestling see all of this, and in the eyes of those who hate it... this is all lost in translation.

As I like to say... "You like to read about and watch stories of moody vampires, a wizard who has a scar on his forehead and werewolves who always seem to forget to wear shirts... I like to read about and watch stories of a streak that will never die, a new group of rookies trying to take over a company and a rebel who is the kryptonite to a superhero."

Reason 3: Wrestling Is Stupid

"Wrestling is so fake."

All wrestling fans at one point or another have heard this asinine statement made from someone they know.

The answer to that statement will vary depending on how offended one gets from it.

My answer?

"Well yea, of course...but isn't everything else on TV?"

With the exception of sports...

(which by the way, as a side note: I do not consider pro wrestling to be a sport, although "sport" is defined as recreation and pleasant past-time; pro wrestling has a pre-determined outcome, and therefore, in my opinion, cannot be classified as sport. Sport entertainment? Yes. Sport in general...no.)

...everything on television is scripted, edited and produced to be "reality."

While my mom acknowledges the entertainment value behind wrestling, ultimately, she deems it stupid.

"If it's "fake," then why should I care or be entertained by the competition between these men?"

That's a fair statement, and to her credit, she's got a point. I did force this woman to watch with me as a child, and she's certainty formed a couple of well rounded opinions in that time.

"Everything is always the same, the good guy will eventually win and every match is the same as well; Up and downs, big spots, a surprise outcome, someone interferes and the story marches on until I'm forced to pay $50 every month for you to see the "big" match."...

... "Wrestling is stupid, sweetheart; I'm sorry."

Another fair point. It really is all the same...but so is everything else.

Music will always have its verses, choruses, hooks and melodies. Movies and plays will always have a begging, middle and end act. Literature will always have its chapters, characters and fairytale outcomes; good or bad.

Wrestling will always have its "good guys" win in the end, monthly pay-per-views, hit and miss promos and matches that range from epic to fail in quality. 

Is wrestling stupid? Probably.

Is wrestling something fun to get lost in? Yes.

Is professional wrestling going to be around for generations to come? Of course!

Is professional wrestling an art form? You better believe it!

And in the end...to each his own...