Cubs have no excuse not to win World Series now

Last January, after meeting his employees at the Long Island newspaper he had just purchased, Sam Zell was heard to complain: "I don't know much about baseball, but I just found out that I'm paying some schmuck about $20 million a year to hit .200."

A sportswriter friend of mine, who had come to the Newsdayauditorium expecting a kind of pep rally, couldn't figure out exactly whom his new boss was referring to. Zell's other recent acquisitions included Chicago's storied National League franchise. But which Cub was the schmuck in question? The most expensive position player, Alfonso Soriano, made a mere $13 million in 2008, coming off a season that saw him hit .299. Or maybe Zell was talking about Carlos Zambrano, who was beginning a five-year contract extension worth more than $18 million per. Despite 18 wins, Zambrano had hit only .247.

Suffice it to say that Zell, who should sell the Los Angeles Times as he has since sold Newsday, knows as little about baseball as he does about journalism.

Still, his larger point is well-taken. You don't have to be a schmuck to assume a relationship between pay and performance. I know — as you will be reminded countless times in the coming days — that the Cubs haven't won the World Series in 100 years. Nor have they won a pennant since 1945.

That doesn't make them sentimental favorites, much less lovable losers. In fact, the whole loveable loser notion has become an anomaly. It no longer applies.

You don't believe me? Ask the Mets.

Mets folklore, like that of the Cubs, is based on a nostalgic notion, going back to the original 1962 team that managed to lose 120 games in allegedly charming manner. For years, the Mets got a lot of mileage out of not being the Yankees. (Same for the Red Sox, of course). But those sentiments should be demolished with Shea Stadium.

The Mets are a $138-million team that has underachieved (albeit in thrilling fashion) three years in a row. Nothing cute about that. The Cubs are different, though.

The Cubs are a $118-million team with a good chance to win it all. They went from worst to first in 2007, and from first to better this year, when they won the National League's best division by seven and a half games.

Not only are they the best team in the league, they are as tested as any team outside the Tampa Bay Rays. The Cubs didn't luck out or get fat in bad divisions like the Dodgers and Angels, either.

The Cubs don't need another pep rally featuring Jim Belushi, who just won't stop until he is declared the Billy Crystal of Chicago's Northside. They don't need any talk of the Black Cat or Steve Bartman.

That stuff is for schmucks. The Cubs are a big-budget, big-market team. They're healthy. They have a winning manager, who had a chance to set up his rotation going into the playoffs. They have everything — but an excuse.

On the Mark

Forget playing for your scholarship. If I'm Pete Carroll, I'm going after guys' Escalades.

The NFC East is more competitive than a mommy and me yoga class on the west side of L.A.

The Princess Leia hairdo kind of works for Manny Ramirez, no?

I failed to understand just how much Al Davis really despises Lane Kiffin until he didn't fire him.

Heard the Jets scored 56.

Did they join the Arena League?

Seriously, not to take anything from Brett Favre's great day, but those guys in the Wrangler commercial play tougher defense than the Cardinals' secondary.

It's just what Favre needed, though. The way he'd been throwing, it looked like he was headed straight for the Mets' bullpen.

Speaking of which, with all the old-timers on hand for the Final Collapse at Shea, how did they not call on Jesse Orosco?

Strange but true: After adding Johan Santana, the Mets were only a game better than last year's team, which finished by losing six of seven.

Even stranger: General manager Omar Minaya got a four-year extension last week.

According to The New York Times, 12 athletes have decided to leave their brains to science.

You think Matt Millen could make it a baker's dozen.

Just kidding. Are we sure the Lions didn't overreact?

I mean, the way I'm hearing it, Millen's been telling people that Detroit was just one wide out away.

Terrell Owens, who dropped a touchdown before the two-minute warning, is feeling unloved again.

Never saw that coming.

Then again, the Clay Aiken thing blindsided me, too.

You think you got problems? Michael Agovino, author of a splendid memoir entitled, The Bookmaker, was a die-hard Mets fan whose father bet the rent (not to mention Agovino's spring semester tuition) on the '86 Red Sox.

Citi Field should feature defibrillators in the home team's clubhouse.

I don't know if HBO's Designated Opponent, Ricardo Mayorga, is really a smoker.

Just that he should be fighting in one.

Now that these Touchdown Takeoff celebrations have reached epidemic proportions, who will be the first genius to fracture his wrist diving into the end zone?

More good news, Jets fans: With Tom Brady out, the schedule is easier than Madonna in the Eighties.

Heard they're going to salvage the urinals at Shea.

Be easier than salvaging Allan Houston's career.

This just in. At 2 p.m. tomorrow, there will be a press conference announcing that the Arizona Cardinals have been officially disbanded.

This article originally published on FOXSports.com.

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