Power Ranking Every Helmet in the NFL
Super Bowls, division championships and statistical records are nice. But what's really important in the NFL?
That's right: helmet bragging rights.
Helmets aren't just about protection. They're about style as well. Some teams look sleek in their dapper domes while others need a makeover very badly.
You've been waiting for this slideshow your entire life: power rankings for the NFL's helmets.
32. Buffalo Bills
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This helmet was designed when one Buffalo Bills employee drank a red slushie and another drank a blue slushie and then both simultaneously vomited on a team helmet. Voila!
What is that? A buffalo with a racing stripe?
The alternate white helmet and the white retro helmet were are both better options. But the main problem still comes down to the graphic, not the base color.
31. Jacksonville Jaguars
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I don't blame Maurice Jones-Drew for trying to hide his helmet in between his legs. He knows it's the second ugliest cap in the league.
It might work to Jones-Drew's advantage since he doesn't have to worry about scratching it up when bowling over opponents.
Jacksonville had a clean slate as an expansion team in 1995 and could have created any uniform design not already in use. And these are the colors that they chose: teal, black, gold and white.
30. Denver Broncos
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More than anything, it's the color scheme that's screwing up the Broncos helmets. The Bronco logo is actually pretty cool, but it's on an awful dark blue and orange palette.
The Broncos should bring back the lighter shades of orange and blue with the current uniform styling. Remember that helmet? With the "D" and the snorting horse in the middle? That was a helmet to be proud of.
There's just something off about most modern designs. I can't put my finger on it, but it's almost as if they are trying too hard.
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29. Minnesota Vikings
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I've got to admit something: it took me several years to figure out that the white logos on the sides of the Vikings' helmet were supposed to be horns. Like a Viking helmet.
While I take some of the blame—many readers have pointed out my idiocy in the comment section of previous articles—I also believe that some blame must be placed with the designer.
Even though I've known for many years now exactly what I'm supposed to be seeing when I look at Minnesota's helmets, it's still not convincing. It was a creative attempt, but it has failed.
28. Carolina Panthers
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These could be very close to being a great design. If you delete the "Panther Blue" outline of the Panther on the helmet, it might work.
As it is, it doesn't get the job done. The Panther is far too big and cartoonish. Why not replace it with a running panther that's sleeker and stretches across the helmet instead of taking up half of the area.
It's hard for anything to work with those Panther Blue uniforms.
27. Arizona Cardinals
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Hey I have an idea: Let's take the head of a decapitated Cardinal and slap it on the side of a helmet. That was apparently the forethought that lead to the Arizona Cardinal domes.
It's not necessarily ugly, it's just unoriginal and kind of weird. Why don't teams with bird mascots try using a bird of choice with wings spread on the side of the helmet?
I don't know how it would look, but it's worth a try. Get on it, NFL uniform stylists. I want to see some proofs on my desk first thing tomorrow.
26. Detroit Lions
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The problem with the Lions' helmet is the ridiculous striping. There are about two dozen different stripes running down the middle of the helmet. Not really, but there are too many.
It's just too busy. It's too bad because some noticeable and appreciated details have been added to the Lion graphic.
It's wasted, however, because the Lions can't decide what color to use as the stripe. It begs the question: is the striping even necessary at all?
25. San Francisco 49ers
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I love the San Francisco 49ers colors. And the helmet accents the rest of the uniform neatly.
This isn't about what's wrong with the helmets currently; it's about opportunities missed. So many teams are named after birds or ominous animals, and it's easy to come up with a logo that emanates what the team name is.
The 49ers, however, is much more difficult to nail down. Many teams with similar names, such as Aggies or Miners, go with a classic cowboy-looking fellow with a large-brimmed hat. But San Francisco can take a more creative approach.
How about two red, crossing pick axes thinly outlined in white? Oh yeah. Let that sink in.
24. Tennessee Titans
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The Tennessee Titans' helmet is just too busy. There are four or five different colors, a nonsensical logo and striping.
The striping is unique, in that the two stripes start wide and get closer together as they run along the helmet. It's actually the only saving grace of this design.
Simplicity is often the best option when it comes to helmet decals. Take that "T' and let it stand alone. Enlarge it and get rid of the rest of that weirdness.
23. Miami Dolphins
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Remember the helmets worn by the Sharks in "Any Given Sunday?" They were simple, with only the outlining of a shark on the side and two thin stripes down the middle. Miami could go with a similar design.
The striping is two wide and should only use one color. The dolphin logo incorporates the sunshine state idea with the sun, but it's too cartoonish.
I'd even be interested to see what the outline of a fin and nothing else would look like.
22. Washington Redskins
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Isn't there just something weird about the profile of a Native American on a helmet?
Florida State has the right idea, using a spear to incorporate the essence of their mascot without being degrading. Washington could use a tomahawk. Or, how would a script "'Skins" look?
The helmet doesn't suffer from the color scheme; The Redskins have one of the best schemes in the NFL.
21. Baltimore Ravens
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Take the Titans' striping and make it just a bit better. That's what the Ravens have done with their helmets. The stripes seem a bit closer at the start.
Again with the decapitated bird theme, though. There has to be a better way to represent a bird mascot than to just put a representation of its head on the side. What about a design using claws?
20. New England Patriots
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There are positives and negatives to this design. Making the Patriot logo resemble the American flag was creative. The lack of striping is original and earns points in a league obsessed with helmet striping.
But there is something off about it. The Pats should try blue helmets, at least as alternates with their white uniforms.
19. Kansas City Chiefs
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The helmets are starting to look better, aren't they? We're slowly altering from complaints to compliments.
Kansas City is the first helmet that I don't at least somewhat dislike. I'm neutral. I can't think of any way that I would change it, but I feel like it could use some spicing up.
There is a noticeable lack of yellow in the helmet.
18. Seattle Seahawks
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Seattle does a nice job of using the head of its bird mascot by making it look more infinite. From the side, you can't see the end of the bird's head, which eliminates the decapitation method used by other teams.
All of the team colors are in use, but it's not too busy.
The only problem I have with it is the empty space in the back. Seattle should just make both Seahawk heads meet in the back.
17. New Orleans Saints
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There is a rule in helmet striping that should be loosely followed: if there are no stripes on the pants, there should be no stripes on the helmet. That's not to say that there can't be pant-striping alone.
The Saints should follow this rule. The only striping that I would find care to see is a single black stripe down the middle.
Just streamline the design a bit can take a solid design to a top 10 ranking.
16. Tampa Bay Buccaneers
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There's nothing to complain about with this design. The skull and crossbones are cool and the tattered flag is as well.
Omitting striping was a good move.
I always thought it was funny on the old creamsicle design how the Buccaneer looked more like a gallivanting prince than a pirate. I'm glad to see the politically correct buccaneer has walked the plank.
15. Chicago Bears
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What is it about the Bears' helmet that makes Jay Cutler's face look so smooshed? It looks like he just crammed it down on his head as far as possible, adding to his pouting demeanor.
The design itself lends to the Chicago theme: simple and classic.
It's one of the looks that has stood the test of time.
14. Pittsburgh Steelers
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Pittsburgh helmet is unique if nothing else. It's one of the few helmets to feature a single stripe, which is underused in the NFL. It also puts numbers on the front of the helmet. Points for originality.
Although the logo does little for me, having it on only one side of the helmet is a neat twist.
There is history behind the logo, going to great lengths to incorporate the steel industry, so I don't want to be too rough on it.
13. Philadelphia Eagles
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Take note teams with bird mascots. There is a different approach than just slapping a bird's head on ta helmet. Use the wings. Crazy, right?
Philadelphia's bird-themed helmet is the second best in the league. I would like to see a white alternate helmet to match the white pants. It would be worth a try.
12. Atlanta Falcons
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Atlanta is the only bird team in the NFL brave enough to use an representation of its mascot on its helmet. The limited detail of the image makes it possible.
Did you notice how much detail was used by the Cardinals and the Ravens? It's just too much. Simpler is almost always better.
It doesn't hurt the Falcons that they have one of the best color schemes in the NFL.
11. Cincinnati Bengals
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This high of a ranking has more to do with Cincinnati's guts for trying this design than it does with how it actually looks. It's still a great look, but credit has to be given for the creative approach.
It would have been much easier to just put that "B" that's on the front of the jersey on the side of the helmet as well. Or, the Bengals could have put some weak tiger graphic on there.
But they went for broke and won.
10. Houston Texans
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How do you draw a Texan?
Houston made life difficult on itself when it chose Texans as its team name in terms of creating a team logo. It would have been easy to write "Texans" on the helmet or just use a block "H." But Houston was more creative than that.
The incorporated the longhorn obsession that Texas has with the Texas state flag. It's the best expansion design we've seen in a long time.
9. Oakland Raiders
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When in their black tops, the Oakland Raiders have possibly the best top-to-bottom look in the NFL. But this is just about helmets, so the Raiders slip a little bit in the rankings.
The single stripe is perfect. The only problem that I have with the helmet is that the Raider in the decal is wearing his own helmet. It's just slightly weird.
This is nitpicking. It's one of the best helmets the league has to offer.
8. St. Louis Rams
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In much the same way that Cincinnati just went for it, St. Louis did as well. The Rams nailed it, though, with the Ram horn idea.
It's different yet appropriate.
The color changes last decade helped. It's funny, though, how those awful color schemes from the past (the Buccaneers' creamsicles, the Rams blue and yellow, etc.) make for tremendous alternates.
7. Dallas Cowboys
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That Cowboy helmet is one of the most iconic symbols in American sports. That star is unmistakable.
Overall as a design, though, it could be better. It just doesn't pop the way some other helmets do. It's still a fabulous look that has etched itself into the conscience of most Americans and others around the world.
The Dallas Cowboys are practically a symbol of America, making this helmet pretty damn powerful.
6. Cleveland Browns
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In the midst of all the cliche color schemes—the black and red, the red, white and blue, etc.—comes the Cleveland Browns' brown, orange and white. It's a refreshing and sharp look.
It's all capped off by that orange dome. It's simple and stunning at the same time.
Browns fans are just hoping that they'll actually get to see it more than 16 times one of these years.
5. New York Jets
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The dual stripes are surprisingly rare in the NFL, but the New York Jets use it effectively on their helmets. The logo is a simple block-lettering of "JETS." It's not flashy, but it looks sharp.
New York could have tried to incorporate an image of an actual jet, but that would start to get dicey, making the helmet look cluttered.
The Jets have a good thing going.
4. Green Bay Packers
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It's the most classic look in the NFL and it has stood the test of time. Green Bay's "G" themed design is one of the more proud-looking helmets in the NFL.
The green and yellow performs in much the same way as Cleveland's brown and orange, breaking the mold of standard color schemes.
3. New York Giants
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There's just something about that "NY" design that pops off the helmet. The way that the "Y" tails under the "N" gives it a flair that make a simple look eye-catching.
Again, the single stripe is spectacular, this time for the New York Giants. Too many teams use too many stripes, ruining otherwise solid designs.
2. Indianapolis Colts
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As long as you can get past that inflatable-looking helmet that Peyton Manning wears, this is a tremendous look. It's classic but not boring, understated but still catchy.
Not to beat a dead horse, but there's a single stripe.
The horseshoe is an original way to represent the Colts. Using a horse would not have been a miss, but it would have been the same old idea.
1. San Diego Chargers
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Here it is: the grandaddy of NFL helmets. The blue version is great, but the white version is the best helmet the league has to offer.
The bolts down the side are a flashy way to epitomize the team name. Despite being flashy, the design isn't cluttered or give off a "modernized" vibe.
There are some outstanding helmet designs in the NFL, but none are better than that of the San Diego Chargers.
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