Michael Vick Wants a Dog and Other Sports PR Nightmares

So, Michael Vick wants a dog? The Eagles quarterback admitted in an interview on Tuesday with NBC Sports and TheGiro.com that he'd love to have a dog again, if he's allowed, and thinks it would be a huge help in his rehabilitation process. 

For those of you who are wondering why this is news, bear in mind that Vick spent 18 months in jail for running a dogfighting ring and that the quarterback was banned from ever owning a dog again by the judge who sentenced him.

Can you imagine the Eagle's PR rep trying to spin this for PETA? Yikes. In honor of that soon-to-be-harassed employee, we're bringing you 10 potential PR nightmares, and showing you just how a PR person would spin them. 

10. Vick Wants a Dog

Ronald Martinez/Getty Images

ARLINGTON, TX - DECEMBER 12: Quarterback Michael Vick #7 of the Philadelphia Eagles celebrates his touchdown run against the Dallas Cowboys at Cowboys Stadium on December 12, 2010 in Arlington, Texas. (Photo by Ronald Martinez/Getty Images)

This one's really not a terrible idea a few years from now. Most reasonable people could understand Vick wanting the chance to show he's a changed man, and the only way to really do that would be to give him a dog. 

But can you see the press release for that?

"Michael Vick has decided to purchase a dog. He's attempting to prove that he's a changed man, that he's learned the value of an animal's life in a family, and that he can adequately care for a dog." 

Given the millions of Americans who will never forgive Vick for what he did, it wouldn't matter much how the PR rep decided to spin that one.

9. Sal Alosi Is Running a Coaching Clinic

NFL Photos/Getty Images

EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ - 2009: Sal Alosi of the New York Jets poses for his 2009 NFL headshot at photo day in East Rutherford, New Jersey. (Photo by NFL Photos)

Check out this potential PR pitch:

"You want to host a clinic, Sal? We can sell it as 'gaining an inside look at some of the NFL's deepest, darkest secrets.'

You want to give them a look at how to properly intimidate gunners, and how to feign innocence for something done deliberately, right? Perfect!"

8. Bill Belichick Wants To Own a Camera Shop

Leon Halip/Getty Images

DETROIT - NOVEMBER 25: New England Patriots head coach Bill Belichick looks on during the game against the Detroit Lions at Ford Field on November 25, 2010 in Detroit, Michigan. New England defeated Detroit 45-24. (Photo by Leon Halip/Getty Images)

"What's that? Belichick wants to run a camera shop? No problem! We'll sell it as 'the master passing his knowledge on to the masses.'

We can even give people a money-back guarantee! The NFL won't catch you using this camera, or your money back!" 

7. Brett Favre's Sending Text Attachments Again

Leon Halip/Getty Images

DETROIT - DECEMBER 13: Quarterback Brett Favre #4 of the Minnesota Vikings covers his face with his hand during the game against the New York Giants at Ford Field on December 13, 2010 in Detroit, Michigan. The Giants defeated the Vikings 21-3. (Photo by

"Ummm...well, you're an old man, right? We'll just say you're trying to get used to the technology in these newfangled phones!

So, you accidentally sent your 'Attachment' to dozens of female employees. You're old! You don't know any better!"

6. Cecil Newton's Got a Bentley

"Ummm...Cecil was given this car by a member of his congregation, who is unaffiliated with Auburn University or its football program.

Cam Newton has not been allowed anywhere near this car."

5. Isaiah Thomas Is the Knicks New Coach

Nick Laham/Getty Images

NEW YORK - MARCH 08: Head coach Isiah Thomas of the New York Knicks watches from the sideline against the Portland Trail Blazers at Madison Square Garden March 8, 2008 in New York City. NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledges and agrees that, by downlo

"We here at the Knicks organization are thrilled to have someone with Thomas' pedigree and skill play—wait, he's coaching?! Again?

We here at the New York Knicks are thrilled to have Thomas back in the fold, now that Anucha Browne Sanders is no longer affiliated with the team." 

4. Ben Roethlisberger's at a Toga Party

Jared Wickerham/Getty Images

PITTSBURGH - DECEMBER 12: Ben Roethlisberger #7 of the Pittsburgh Steelers warms up prior to the game against the Cincinnati Bengals on December 12, 2010 at Heinz Field in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. (Photo by Jared Wickerham/Getty Images)

"We'll just tell them that your love of college kids prompted you to host this party for the ladies of those three schools, Ben. I'm sure it'll be fine.

And the punch? How were you supposed to know someone would spike it?"

3. Antonio Cromartie Teaching Sex Ed

Jim McIsaac/Getty Images

EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ - OCTOBER 11: Randy Moss #84 of the Minnesota Vikings runs a pattern on offense against Antonio Cromartie #31 of the New York Jets at New Meadowlands Stadium on October 11, 2010 in East Rutherford, New Jersey. The Jets won 29-20. (Pho

"Antonio just wants the chance to share his considerable experience in the areas of sex and contraception.

When the chance to do explain it all to hundreds of teenagers a year presented itself, he just had to take it. "

2. John Rocker's Living in Harlem

Rick Stewart/Getty Images

27 Feb 2002: John Rocker of the Texas Rangers poses during media day at Charlotte County Stadium in Port Charlotte, Florida. DIGITAL IMAGE Mandatory Credit: Rick Stewart/Getty Images

"Mr. Rocker simply wants to experience the culture of New York City firsthand.

He decided there was nowhere better to do that than in Harlem."

1. Pacman Jones Wants To Own a Strip Club

Andy Lyons/Getty Images

GEORGETOWN, KY - JULY 31: Adam Jones #24 of the Cincinnati Bengals is pictured during the Bengals training camp at Georgetown College on July 31, 2010 in Georgetown, Kentucky. (Photo by Andy Lyons/Getty Images)

"Ummm...hmmm. How about this?

Mr. Jones' expertise in the area of topless adult entertainment made him a perfect choice to own 'Cat's Meow.'"