Tom Brady, Hair Restoration and Ongoing Attempts to Find Brady's Achilles Heel

"Tom Brady balding" has been one of the hottest web searches over the past few days, and there's only one reasonable explanation for it: Everyone has lost their minds.

As Brady prepares to lead the 9-2 Patriots into perhaps the NFL's game of the year Monday against the New York Jets, all we're talking about is the quarterback's hair follicles.

In the words of Mugatu, Will Ferrell's character in Zoolander, "I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!"

The news, which was broken by—of all media outlets—the National Enquirer, states that Brady was seen leaving an appointment at Leonard Hair Transplant Associates in Cranston, R.I. The head of the associates is reportedly Dr. Robert Leonard, "New England's foremost authority on hair restoration."

While Leonard's office wouldn't confirm or deny that Brady is, in fact, a patient, a hair restoration expert in Chicago told the Associated Press that it's unlikely the Patriots quarterback is beginning treatment with the playoffs just five weeks away.

The “news” comes as terrific fodder for Jets fans and football fans in general tired of seeing the Patriots' continued success. Like the New York Yankees, the New England Patriots have come into so much success over the last decade that the media and football fans across the country jump at the chance to pick on the Pats for anything and everything—including a potential bald spot.

The balding story, of course, is just another in the extensive coverage of Brady's locks this season. When he showed up to training camp sporting the new, long look, news outlets were all over it. When Justin Bieber mentioned Brady's hair in a recently-released song, the story blew up.

Can we please just get back to football?