Useless NBA Comparisons: Can Russell Westbrook Outjump Jack Russell Terriers?
(Editor's note: Bleacher Report teamed up with the infographics wizards at Useless Comparisons to put some of the NBA's biggest names and storylines into new perspective.)
Statistics can help us answer some of the most intriguing questions in sports today.
Did the Seattle SuperSonics' existence impact the annual rainfall in Seattle? How does the vertical leap of Russell Westbrook compare to that of a Jack Russell terrier? What is the relationship between Kevin Garnett's points per game and the resale value of a Ford F-150?
These are the questions that need answers. We set out to answer these and more with comparative graphs to show how statistics can be misleading, utterly useless and, more importantly, fun.
Karl-Anthony Towns vs. House Cat
Karl-Anthony Towns is coming off a tremendous rookie season in which he averaged 18.3 points per game and unanimously won the NBA Rookie of the Year Award. If a house cat were to age as many years as Towns' scoring average last year, it would likely be dead. Towns has never expressed any ill will toward cats, but these numbers are quite suspicious.
LeBron James vs. James and the Giant Peach
LeBron James became the highest-paid player in NBA history with his new three-year, $100 million contract—averaging $33.3 million dollars in salary per year. This may not seem like a lot of money to most people, but when you put into context that James could spend his entire annual salary on James and the Giant Peach tickets and more than double the film's total domestic revenue, it's really impressive.
Andre Drummond vs. Geico Insurance
Switching to Geico could save you 15 percent or more on your car insurance.
If Andre Drummond were to improve his free-throw percentage by 15 percent, he would still be terrible at shooting free throws.
Kevin Garnett vs. Ford F-150
During the back half of his career from 2007 through the end of '16, Kevin Garnett has gracefully transitioned from franchise player to meaningful role player to resident old guy who takes precocious types under his wing. During the same time period, a 2007 Ford F-150 has depreciated as expected, losing around $20,000 in value over nine years. It would seem that a 2007 Ford F-150 would be a fitting retirement gift for The Big Ticket, but we'll have to see next year's data to confirm.
Lance Stephenson vs. Lance Armstrong
Lance is a controversial, hot-headed, extremely competitive athlete who has been disowned by his sport for cheating. He also lied to Oprah years ago.
Lance is a controversial, hot-headed, extremely competitive athlete who has been disowned by his sport for not being that great at basketball. He also turned down a $44 million contract two years ago. Yikes.
Russell Westbrook vs. Jack Russell Terrier
Russell Westbrook is known for his explosive athleticism and elite fashion sense in NBA circles. Jack Russell terriers can jump higher than he can and don't even need to wear clothes. That is the definition of swag.
Dario Saric vs. Daria
If you grew up in the '90s, there wasn't a better depiction of teen angst than the cult-classic cartoon Daria.
If you're a 76ers fan, Dario Saric was a mythical creature you had to take at Sam Hinkie's word was real and was in fact going to play in the NBA eventually. This year, we finally get to see Dario in action, but a Daria remake appears unlikely.
Chicago vs. New York
This should forever end the deep dish vs. thin crust argument. Just look at the numbers.
Seattle Rain vs. Sonics' Reign
It turns out the Sonics existing has little to no impact on annual rainfall in the Seattle metro area. Fans trying to get the Sonics back cannot say the team's return would have any influence on the weather.
Kevin Durant vs. Kevin Costner
The rich get richer. Not only did Kevin Durant sign with an already potent Warriors squad, but he has been absolutely demolishing Kevin Costner in regard to his NBA 2K rating compared to Costner's average Rotten Tomatoes score.
Height vs. Money (The Green Effect)
If you're an entertainer and Green is your last name, shorter is better for your wallet. However, if you are in the NBA and your name is Draymond Green, you make a lot of freaking money—way more than those other Greens.
