The Week One Booze Awards!

Alex FergusonSenior Analyst IISeptember 6, 2009

ARLINGTON, TX - SEPTEMBER 05:  Quarterback Max Hall #15 of the Brigham Young Cougars celebrates a 14-13 win against the Oklahoma Sooners at Cowboys Stadium on September 5, 2009 in Arlington, Texas.  (Photo by Ronald Martinez/Getty Images)

Hey guys....Instead of Impressed/Depressed and Unmoved, we're going for the VFA's beverage awards for the season.

If we loved your performance, you'll get a bottle of champagne—the best drink in the world, in our humble view. If your teams performed in ordinary fashion, you'll get a Budweiser, because let's face it—the Budweiser is an ordinary beverage. And if you're team sucked, you'll get a can of Millwaukee Best—called "The Beast" for darned good reason.

Right, so here we go.....


BYU - Never mind that the victory was helped by the knocking out of Sam Bradford. The Cougars still outplayed the Sooners for vast amounts of the 14-13 victory. Special brewski (of his choice): Max Hall. I have a feeling, bearing in mind you're in Mormon Central, that yours will be a Coke.

Navy—A stirring comeback by Navy at Ohio State woke up college football. Never has an armed forces team been so rooted for this early in the season. A terrible call that turned into a pick, sealing a 31-27 loss. But make no mistake: the Navy has many reasons to be proud. But now, they can be proud of their football team.

Michigan—Oh dear, Big Ten fans. This team—against a pretty good Western Michigan side—looked absolutely awesome today. They now have two good quarterbacks to choose from (sorry, Nick Sheridan, you're not one of them). Suddenly the Wolverines are a bona fide threat to Nittany Lions and Buckeyes fans.

Notre Dame—Nevada was picked as giving the Irish some problems in South Bend, but a stupendous performance from Jimmy Clausen & Co made sure than Johnny Upset didn't have the luck of the Irish. We can't wait for the Michigan vs Notre Dame next week. It could well be a better game than USC and Ohio State next week.

Alabama vs Virgina Tech (atmosphere)—
The bad thing about the game is that it was played in grimy Atlanta, Georgia, which isn't the VFA's favourite place to visit. The great thing is that Dome created the most brilliant atmosphere for the some of the noisiest sets of fans in the country. Oh, and the game wasn't bad either....

Lee Corso—Nice to see you back, Lee

Chipper Jones—When you give up baseball due to injury, you could get a job as a college football pundit!

Baylor—Sorry Bears, didn't expect you to beat Wake Forest on the road. A cracking 24-21 upset victory that might make your Big XII South competitors sit up and think.

Oklahoma State—
We expected a lot of fun from your offense, Cowboys fans, but let's throw this out there: your defense was pretty darned good.

Tennessee—I'm not saying a win over Western Kentucky is reason for bringing out words like "National" and "Championship," but I'll say this: the Volunteers were pretty darned impressive today—especially QB Jonathan Crompton, who threw for five TDs.


it was all going so well until the fourth quarter, wasn't it? Greg Paulus has definitely given Orange Nation some hope though, hasn't it? Hopefully not too much before your visit to Happy Valley.

Penn State—
31-7's not a bad way to start the season. Happy Valley's smiling about the defense, and the wide receiving performance of Derek Moye. On the other hand, the offensive line was so bad for the run that Evan Royster never really had an impact on the game—something that was expected. Navarro Bowman's injury wasn't cool, either.

Florida—Wow. You whooped Charleston Southern. Well done! Defense looks red hot though.

USC—What team will turn up at Columbus - the team that sucked for the first quarter of the San Jose State game, where you trailed 3-0, or the team that then blew them out with 56 straight points? Matt Barkley wasn't an immediate household name in his first start, but he's was very solid indeed. Oh, and that Aaron Corp fella was perfect.

Millwaukee 'Best'

Northern Iowa.
Get.Another. Kicker.

Iowa—Long. Season. Ahead.

Illinois—Never mind the fact that the Illini were completely outplayed by Missouri, but the offense didn't even help make up for a woeful defense. Time will tell if Arrelious Benn's injury is bad enough to sideline him for a while—but in the meantime, Juice Williams had about as much zing as a dead person's punch. Things better improve, or the boosters will get restless with Ron Zook.

Oklahoma—The result of the BYU game was completely irrelevant. The fact that quaterback Sam Bradford went off at half-time clutching his shoulder could put pay to Big XII South and National Championship hopes. There will be celebrations in Texas.

LaGarrette Blount—
Not only does he have a name like LaGarrette Blount, but he rose to the jawings of some hick from Idaho after your team loses their season opener on the blue turf. Personally, I hope they bring him back for the USC game, but he may just have ruined his NFL future with a stupid punch.

THAT Kenny Chesney song—Seriously, the "This is Our Moment" is the suckiest song ESPN has ever put on. As I said in one of my previous posts, it doesn't make you up love college football, it makes you hate Kenny Chesney.

David Matthews Band—"Why I am"—
I love Dave Matthews. I really do. He's awesome. But if we are going to hear this song ALL season long, I'm going to apologise to the wife for blowing up the TV and computer.


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