BJ Penn: Grandma's Next Best Friend?

Yes, I can hear the screams of outrage.

"Grandma, you are too old to be acting so hormonal!" . . ."Dorothy! You are almost 63-years-old, you are acting like a confused teenager!"

Suppose so. The customer, or readers in this case, are always right, aren't they?

Although it could be the results of premature senility settling in, I actually have been known to realize that I have been wrong and changed my mind—a few people are aware of this peculiarity of mine, and now you readers are too.

So I have been avidly consuming all the news off the Press Junket which has Georges St. Pierre, Shari Spencer, his lovely manager, Dana White, and BJ Penn traveling to Toronto and then to Hawaii to promote the Penn vs. St. Pierre fight on January 31, UFC 94.

BJ Penn has been very well received by the Canadians and soon will be hosting the rest of this unusual entourage to Hawaii for the finale of the promotional tour.

There have been no hostilities that I am aware of and BJ appears to be quite a congenial young man. His remarks have been tasteful, he gives Georges props for his fight with Jon Fitch, as well as his athleticism, and there have been no incidents of eye gouging.

Just a comment that it was actually a part of his glove that poked Georges in the eye.

(That will not keep me from launching an all out investigation into the incident including an FBI team to analyze the videos of the event to find the truth.)

Now, stop that loud grumbling! I am being facetious here, folks! I am old and like to have fun, OK?

The next investigation I will launch, depending on the results of the above investigation, will be to see if that fine actor, Matt Hughes accused BJ unjustly of poking him in the eye. Since then, he later admitted to faking a second groin kick from Georges in their second fight.

Matt may have been a renowned Welterweight Champion of the UFC, but he is a sneaky fellow, in my opinion, just like that other farmer/hunter Elmer Fudd.

So, I have admitted to slowly being won over by BJ Penn, now I will mention his thoughts on the upcoming fight.

BJ admits he does not have a 'gameplan' per se, but feels that his technical skills will offset Georges' athletic abilities.

He admits that Georges is strong, quick, and has great athletic ability, which he states he does not have. Pretty complimentary and I would not consider cocky or bragging either. (My admiration is growing by the minute Mr. Penn.)

This is a fight that people (other than BJ himself) have been looking forward to since UFC 58, which if I remember, was in 2006.

Dana White says the result of this welterweight title match at UFC 94 will indeed determine who is the best pound-for-pound fighter in the UFC, which is exciting, is it not?

Not having seen BJ at 170 pounds, (since he has re-dedicated himself to attempting to become the best so he can leave the legacy he desires), I am wondering if he will have the six-pack I remember viewing for the first time at his fight with Jens Pulver.

Perhaps everyone will be photographed in swimsuits while in Hawaii and I can see those abs again. I will admit they looked very impressive on Penn.

Hopefully the voodoo curse I was putting on BJ has expired and he will not be eaten by sharks before the fight.

That would be a sin and a shame because Georges says he likes BJ and is looking forward to their fight. I am sure he would probably be traumatized about swimming in the ocean as a result of a Hawaiian native undergoing such a fate.

I know, I know. Shame on grandma who deal with the occult, I am chastened and am most assuredly ashamed of myself.

Hopefully, the whole crew will get to experience the joys of having pancakes made with Macadamia nuts, which my best friend Isabelle told me about. She is a world traveler and a gourmet cook and says they are an unforgettable treat that in her words are, "to die for."

BJ, this is the most sincere apology I have ever made, "I am sorry for misjudging you!"

Now, do not disappoint me with any eye pokes, accidental or otherwise.