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You Suck Chris Kaman

MOct 29, 2008

Recognize the guy above?  Yes my friends, that is Clippers center Chris Kaman sporting the jersey for the German Olympic team.  For some reason, this Michigan native holds a German citizenship and decided to play for Deutschland.  He even won MVP honors by their journalists, the first and last of its kind for Kaman.

Kaman does not speak any German at all and admitted that he never even visited the country.  Okay fella, I understand that you want to play basketball, but this is just ridiculous.  His father is reported to have said something along the lines or loving his son, but loving his country more.

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I digress.  My point is that he sucks at basketball, not at being an American.  Though the latter is also true.

If anyone saw the Lakers play a "road" game for the Clippers' season opener last night, you saw how many times sorry old number 35 jobbed things up.  You probably also saw how little Baron Davis played and how the Clippers lost by almost 40 points.

Kaman tried to post up Bynum and Gasol, but he was far too weak and could not finish to save his life.  On the other end, nothing happened.  No defense at all.  No rebounding.  No nothing.  Just a couple of fouls to stop guaranteed dunks.

He tried to do little spin moves, not realizing how he has terrible footwork.  Will he dunk or shoot?  Oh right.  He's going to lose the ball.  What the hell is this guy doing?  I really can't stress enough how he is personally responsible for the Clippers' thumping last night, with the exception of Mike Dunleavy.

He finished last night's game with 8 points, 5 boards, 5 fouls and 4 turnovers.  All of this in a mere 30 minutes of play?  Such fantastic stats for a starting center.  This guy is sure to be one of the greats.

I would rather see Mbenga play for the Lakers than watch this debacle Kaman managed to spearhead.  When Chris Mimh is allowed to score at will, something is certainly wrong with the defense.  When point guard Jordan Farmar is allowed to penetrate for an uncontested alley-oop, something is wrong.

That being said, I may have overreacted a little bit.  But the fact remains, Chris Kaman sucks.  He sucks a big one.

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