Dallas Cowboys: Saving Private Garrett

In the 1998 Stephen Spielberg movie “Saving Private Ryan”, a group of Army Rangers is assigned the dubious task of locating Private James Ryan, played by Matt Damon, after his three other brothers are killed in action. It’s a noble idea that a mother should not lose all four of her children in one war.

Noble or not, the group of Rangers felt that this mission was unjust, not necessary and, as I recall, FUBAR … you can look up the meaning there if you don’t know already.

Upon being found and also being among the last survivors in the battle that killed most of Captain John Millers’ men charged with finding Ryan, a mortally wounded Miller, played by Tom Hanks, tells Ryan as he’s passing away, “James…earn this. Earn it.”

We can only hope that a similar conversation has taken place, under much less important circumstances, between Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones and newly crowned special boy Jason Garrett as head coach.

If you imagine James Ryan as Jason Garrett in this case, then Cowboys fans are the 2nd Ranger Battalion.

The fans are expected to embrace this guy who’s precious few accomplishments have garnered him the title as head coach of the Dallas Cowboys. The fans are the ones asked to blindly support a guy who has done harm to the Dallas Cowboys, at least as a play caller. Worse yet, the fans are asked to keep financially supporting the team they have always loved with positively zero indication that Garrett can turn this rapidly declining franchise towards contention.

Sure, Garrett has posted respectable statistics as an offensive coordinator. The wins and deep penetrations into the postseason have not followed, however. Unfortunately for Garrett, this is all that matters to any football fan.

Can Garrett earn this title of head coach despite the lack of experience or accomplishments that would seem to justify such a move? Who knows? He won’t get much time to figure it out though, regardless of what Jones would really prefer as a result.

Perhaps Garrett’s best friend in this promotion is the pending lockout imposed by the NFL owners which will very likely cut into, if not wipe out the 2011 season.

It is rather strange that Garrett is quietly let off the hook when it comes to his catastrophic play-calling and rather immature philosophy as an offensive coordinator. And you can’t say that we only started to see the real Garrett after former head coach Wade Phillips was fired back in November.

Remember that the “Golden Boy” was hired before anybody following the retirement of Bill Parcells following the 2006 postseason.

Garrett has been Jones’ guy for years and years, apparently going back to his days doing nothing significant with guys like Cleo Lemon in Miami as quarterbacks coach. I pointed this fact out to friend of mine this week and his reply was, “Cleo Lemon sucks!”

Exactly my point! When things go wrong under Garrett it is always the player's fault. When they go right, Garrett is the second coming of Bill Walsh it seems. How can this be?

We know that Garrett has not lost any of his brothers in battle. In fact, they all work with him for the Dallas Cowboys as assistant coaches. Hmm.

At my last radio gig as mid-day jock and music director in Fresno, California ending in 2004, I also had my brother working on the air after me doing afternoons. So I understand that having family involved in the same work place can be great, so I’m not knocking the efforts of Garrett’s brothers here…but would it be too cynical to ask what exactly John Garrett is doing with Martellus Bennett the last two years? And did Judd Garrett, Director of Pro Scouting? Those 2009 draft picks are looking better by the minute.

Well, I guess maybe I am knocking them.

Here’s the point: Stacey and I, along with a very strong team, rallied from behind against our cross-town rival and forced them to quit playing the music we did and start playing a fading Brittney Spears. In radio terms, we blew them out after trailing significantly upon our arrival. This took less than two years.

In four years under Garrett, we have seen nothing new regarding his playbook, play-calling and season-ending collapses that have been a hallmark. Spare me with the season ending, draft dropping win over Philadelphia’s second-string, would you please? But on that note, Garrett’s brilliant offensive mind coughed up seven points in that 14-13 blowout win.

So enter James Ryan…make that Jason Garrett as the next head coach of the Dallas Cowboys.

Earn this, Jason.

EARN IT.

You have not done this yet.