Albert Haynesworth: 10 Bold Predictions For His Last Redskins Season
Albert Haynesworth's time in Washington has been one long, strange trip.
It began when he signed a record-breaking seven-year, $100 million contract, of which $42 million was guaranteed. That's when the trouble started.
The former Pro Bowler struggled in his first season in the crimson, failing to make the kind of impact one expects from a player who signed a contract of that size. The questions about his maturity were not resolved, and persisted into this offseason.
Then, the Redskins hired former Broncos Head Coach Mike Shanahan, who promptly implemented his 3-4 defensive scheme. Haynesworth didn't like that too much, and asked to be traded. The Redskins either refused or were unable to do so, so Albert decided not to take part in any kind of preseason anything, save games.
Needless to say, when he showed up to training camp, Haynesworth was out of shape, which angered Shanahan, who forced him to run sprints before he could take part in team activites. "Fat Albert" failed all of the conditioning tests, and complained about injuries, headaches, the coaching staff, and just about anything else he could think of to get himself sent out of town.
A report in yesterday's Washington Post stated that Haynesworth suffers from rhabdomyolysis, a condition in which the skeletal muscle begins to break down when an out-of-shape person takes part in a strenuous workout. The Redskins claim they knew nothing of the condition prior to the article.
What will become of the man they call Fat Albert? Will he find success in DC? Or will he go out the door quietly?
Here are 10 bold predictions about what many believe to be Haynesworth's final season in crimson.
10. Haynesworth Will Practice During the Preseason
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As training camp got underway, Haynesworth threw a bit of a temper tantrum, refusing to show up for OTA's and other voluntary workouts before camp began. Mike Shanahan, ever a stickler for conditioning and fitness, opted to try to force Haynesworth to run sprints, prompting a battle of wills, as Albert jogged through each fitness test, failing them all, while Shanahan kept him off the field until he completed them.
Who won this clash of egos? In a word: Shanahan.
Haynesworth might continue to miss practice, but he is there, and he is working (if only on occasion). This tells me that his will was broken, that his desire to play trumped his desire not to work to play. Shanahan has him now.
If Albert wants to play, he's going to have to do it on Mike's terms, not Albert's. So yes, Haynesworth will continue to practice.
9. He Will Get Hurt in the Preseason
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While Mike Shanahan has won the battle of wills to this point, Haynesworth got himself a trump card in the form of rhabdomyolysis. It's a potentially serious condition: As the muscles break down, they release chemicals into the bloodstream, including myoglobin, which can cause acute kidney failure.
Now, I'm certainly not saying it's going to be a fake injury (although he might try to pull that), but it is almost certain that the big man will injure himself in the preseason. It'll probably be something minor, like a muscle pull, but it will be enough to shut him down for the rest of the preseason. He'll get what he wants, and Shanahan can't make him practice because of his condition.
A win-win for Fat Albert.
8.Albert Will Return for the Regular Season
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Now, don't fret, all you 'Skins fans, because Fat Albert will be healthy for the start of the regular season.
He couldn't possibly complain about injuries with a couple of weeks off in late August, right? Right. So Haynesworth will return before the regular season begins, and will probably claim to be in the best shape of his life.
He'll make a couple tackles, say the right things, and people will think maybe he's matured. That is, until prediction No. 7...
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7. He Will Get Injured Again
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This time, it'll sideline the big man for upwards of four weeks. Probably an ankle sprain, given the kind of weight he's carrying around. He won't be happy about it, the fans will be livid, and everyone will be rather irritable about the whole endeavor.
Now, I'm not saying it's going to be season-ending, but it'll be something that could linger, which is why I'm thinking sprain. That way, when the team trades him, he can tell his new team that his ankle bothered him all season long, and he wasn't up to snuff.
But in order to get traded, he has to play some, which means....
6. Albert Will Return To Play in the Regular Season
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This is very simple: Haynesworth has no value to a team if he doesn't play this season. If he gets hurt, he'll come back and play, simply to accrue statistics from this year, and to keep from losing a step (when you move as slowly as he does, that's a huuuuuuge deal).
Rest assured, that no matter when Haynesworth gets hurt, he will return this season. And he'll say he's motivated to help the team win, that his time off has made him hungry, that he's ready to go. And the worst part is, he might actually believe it.
But slide No. 5 tells us the truth.
5. Haynesworth Will Not Record a Full Sack This Season
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Yes, that's right, you heard me. He won't get a sack.
Think about it for a minute: Shanahan's nose tackles were never there to rush the passer, their sole purpose is to stop the run and hold blockers for the ends and linebackers. The injury, plus a grouchy Fat Albert, plus Shanahan's defensive scheme equals lots of double teams for Haynesworth and no sacks.
Will he assist on one? Sure, he might bump into the quarterback or something. But we won't see the big, strong sacks like this one in the 2010-11 season.
4. He'll Finish with a Career High in Tackles
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While Shanahan's 3-4 system means a diminishing number of sack opportunities for Fat Albert, the trade-off is that he will see an increase in tackling opportunities as a whole. As the sole plug in the center of the defensive line, running backs will find themselves barreling into Haynesworth's clutches all season long. In spite of injuries, in spite of grumpiness, frankly, in spite of Albert, Haynesworth will have a career-high in tackles.
3. Fat Albert Will Piss Off Mike Shanahan and Dan Snyder by Season's End
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It's going to happen. You know it, I know it, they know it. At some point this season, Haynesworth is going to do or say something to irk both Head Coach Mike Shanahan and owner Dan Snyder.
Why?
Because pissing them off is the only way to get them to trade him. He's untradeable with a contract and gut that size. If he pisses them off enough, they will trade him, eat his salary, and take 50 cents on the dollar, just to get rid of him.
But he'll get his way, so you know this will happen.
2. Albert Is Gone at Season's End
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This will happen as soon as the season ends.
Not before, not a few months later. As soon as it is okay to resume trading and releasing players, Albert Haynesworth will no longer be a Washington Redskin. They will drop him like a bad habit, a bad itch, a bad banana.
Shoot, if he irks Snyder quickly enough, it'll happen before the trade deadline.
Haynesworth will be off to Oakland, or Cleveland, or Cincinnati, or whomever is willing to take him. Everyone will make a big deal about it, saying he needed a change of scenery. But, we know the truth, because of prediction No. 1.
1. Albert Haynesworth Will Do All of This Again Next Year
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Wherever he is, whoever he's playing for, whatever position he's playing, one thing is certain at this point in Albert Haynesworth's career: He is a diva.
If he has to do something he doesn't want to do (like lay off the cheeseburgers and get in shape), he pouts and refuses to do it. This is a guy who hasn't had 50 tackles in a season, despite all the potential in the world. He whines, complains, and is a dirty player (as we saw in Tennessee). He needs to grow up, but he has too many people around him telling him he's great the way he is.
So, if he comes to your team, be prepared. Because all this will happen to you.
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