NBA Free Agency: LeBron James, Dwyane Wade Prove Pimping Is Easy

If prostitution is the world's oldest profession then pimping comes a close second, because as soon as it was learned there was money to be made from sex, men found a way to manipulate it.

The classic images of pimps are usually defined by their wardrobes, which usually include the colors green and gold, and their love for big cars, preferably Cadillacs.

Pimps are also known for their degrading and demeaning perception, and treatment, of women, and most have come up with their own distinct terminology when discussing the pimp game.

Some pimp slang, such as the phrase "pimpin' ain't easy", has been adopted by the hip-hop community and used to describe a regular person's continuous journey through the tedium of life.

"Pimpin' ain't easy" is an ironic phrase because for those talented at the skill of manipulation, pimping is almost second nature. For proof, look no further than the circus which has become NBA free agency.

Lebron James and Dwyane Wade have used their status as two of the biggest free agents in the history of the game, and elevated pimping to heights previously unseen.

In order to be an effective pimp, you must first have a captive audience and when Wade made it publicly known that he and other free agents would collectively discuss their options, the attention of the basketball world was captured.

A good pimp is also able to hold attention once it has been attained and Wade did just that by giving subtle hints that a super team consisting of several high profile free agents may be in the making.

Finally, a good pimp always lets his subject know who is in control by using a mixture of violence and mental intimidation to get their point across.

Wade may not have slapped Pat Riley around, but he did make it known that his visions of a super team could be realized in another city if Miami didn't invest the money to make it happen there.

If Wade's words and actions were similar to pimping then James' attitude and indifferent approach to free agency could be called "Pimpology 101", because his casual manner is a classic portrayal of a smooth pimp.

James was not as vocal as Wade in his intentions, but his actions have made it clear who the biggest fish is in the free agency pond truly is.

James' announcement that he would not make the usual free agent visits to potential suitors, but would rather have those teams come to him is just one illustration of how James showed the NBA where the true power lies.

Tonight's one hour spectacle on ESPN concerning where James will sign is another.

Never mind that it was pretty much a fore-gone conclusion James would sign with Miami once Wade and Chris Bosh announced they would do the same on Wednesday.

Never before has a player been able to capture the attention of every person who cares anything about basketball, and not even Michael Jordan was able to manipulate the media in the manner that James has.

For that alone, James is the NBA's ultimate pimp.

We are all witness to what has been an example of an NBA prostitution ring at it's finest where we are the ho's, the potential teams are the johns, and Wade and James are the pimps.

In Wade and James' case, it's not even about the money because their pairing will likely result in less income than if James would have remained with the Cleveland Cavaliers.

But it's definitely about power and the ability to exert influence, and there will likely be charges of collusion, and an effort by commissioner David Stern to possibly annul any alliance in Miami.

But if Stern is the proverbial law in the case of the NBA pimp game, then his battle is already lost because it will be much harder to prove wrong-doing, short of Wade or James making a Jerry Stackhouse type of mistake.

Both Wade and James have mastered the art of basketball on the court, but their ability to manipulate the negotiations in free agency has been just as impressive as anything they have done on the hardwood.

"Pimpin' ain't easy" may aptly describe the life that common people share, but for players like James and Wade, pimping is not only easy, but it could prove to be very rewarding as well.