Sports: True Confession: Why I would like to be the Erma Bombeck of Sports

Aspirations.  Everyone has them.  When I was very young I desperately wanted to be a writer.

I used to amuse my friends by writing humorous articles.  Being young the articles tended to be very frivolous.  The one I remember best was "How to annoy the Paperboy."  For some reason, adolescent girls thought that one was hysterical.

As I grew I emulated my favorite writers and adopted their styles for my writing; mostly short stories or poems.

Later, as an adult and a dedicated stay-at-home mother of two sons, I discovered Erma Bombeck.  She was so wise in relating her life experiences to a very wide and appreciative audience that I began to wish to be her.

On the gloomiest, cooped-up in the house days, going crazy with the kids playing or running through the house (sometimes accompanied by our dogs, cats, or even the goats on a few occasions), I could always sit down with Erma, read her latest column and realise that even in the most wretched situation, I was not alone.

So much relief, reassurance, and common sense advice was contained in her columns; there was always something that resonated within her that also touched a chord of truth in me.  Erma sustained me for years until her death.

A feeling that her death was untimely filled me because I still needed her for solace.  I had not yet explored all the meanings of life and felt I needed her to pre-digest them for me just a little bit longer until I learned to get by on my own.

Now days I am mostly housebound and an observer of life.  The lives of my family are my first concern, but sports have been a mainstay for me ever since I discovered that I was indeed a tom-boy.  And if it were not for developing huge breasts much earlier in life than is fair for a dedicated tom-boy, I would probably have achieved success in a sport.  (Maybe someday I will have to explain that statement, but not right now.)

Sports have meant a lot to me.  At some time though, the most avid fan will find disappointment in their favorite diversion, no matter what their team or player.

Helping people get through these minor crises would be my objective.

There are jokes about "da Bears," jokes about the Cubs and Cards, and my husband tells me there are even jokes for followers of NASCAR, although I am personally immune to that particular pastime.

Some folks have misconstrued my attempts at both humor and satire in my offerings on Bleacher Report, and I am sorry for that.

When someone reads an article I have written I would like to give them the sense of comfort that Erma Bombeck gave me.

Even when fans are griping about how their team failed to make playoffs, their golf hero had to take a time out for surgery, or the last MMA PPV sucked big time, I would like to be the calm voice of reassurance that "even this too shall pass:  there is always tomorrow."