Funniest Sports Injuries of All-Time

Greg CaggianoSenior Writer IJune 15, 2008

Ever see that your favorite player is heading to an injured list and you just wonder why? You didn’t see them get injured while making a play on the field or on the ice. Well, here are the hidden, funniest sports injures of all time. I guarantee they’ll cause you to shake your head and ask, “Just what the hell were they thinking?”

Baseball

Sammy Sosa: Missed three weeks with a back injury after he sneezed violently.

Brent Mayne: Checked for traffic before crossing the street, pulled a neck             muscle.

Adam Eaton: Accidentally stabbed himself while trying to open a DVD case with     a steak knife.

Mariano Rivera: Tied his shoes, threw out his back.

Steve Sparks: Friends challenged him to a phone book tearing contest—he             dislocated his shoulder.

John Smoltz: Ironed a shirt…while he was wearing it.

Glenallen Hill: Had a dream he was being chased by a giant spider. He jumped

    out of bed and sliced open his foot on a glass table.

Moises Alou: Woke up this morning.

Clint Barmes: Broke his collarbone by carrying deer meat up to his apartment.

Johnny Damon: Injured back by getting into a car.

Kevin Mitchell: Put a donut in the microwave. Microwave exploded.

Ricky Bones: Tore muscle in his hand while changing channels with a TV remote.

Roger Craig: Cut his hand while adjusting the strap of his wife’s bra.

Juan Sandoval: Shot in the face with a shotgun.

Jeff Cirillo: Hit a game winning home run, jumped into the air and threw his helmet to the ground. Twisted ankle when he stepped on the helmet.

Hunter Pence: Walked through a really clean, glass door.

Jimmy Gobble: Kicked a cactus barefoot.

Kazuo Matsui: Anal fissure. No more details needed.

Matt Morris: Jumped off a flight of stairs. Twisted ankle.

Julian Tavares: Broke hand by punching a dugout phone.

Keichi Yabu: Was using a Bowflex in the locker room when the strap snapped and sliced open his face.

Hockey

Wade Belak: Bit by a spider.

Ron Tugnutt: Tied his shoes and pulled a groin muscle.

Eric Lindros: Showed up at the arena.

Manny Fernandez: Injured his back while blow drying his hair.

Jose Theodore: Broke ankle when he slipped on an icy driveway.

Brent Sopel: Threw out his back when he picked up a broken cracker off the floor.

Football

Brian Griese: Sprained ankle after being chased by a dog.

Chris Hanson: Cut open his foot while chopping wood with an axe.

Jake Plummer: Injured foot while getting off the couch.

Ben Roethlisberger: Was given a motorcycle license.

Bill Grammatica: Kicked a football.

Robert Pratt: Ran out on the field for the coin toss. Pulled a hamstring.

Chase Blackburn: Suffered inner ear injury when he put a Q-tip in too far.

Max McGee: Fell off the roof while cleaning the gutters on his house.

Basketball

Magic Johnson: Had unprotected sex.

Darryl Dawkins: Sliced open hand while washing a broken dinner plate.

Tony Allen: After the whistle blew and play was dead, he attempted to slam dunk a ball. Tore his ACL.

Drew Gooden: Infected hair follicle.

Kevin Johnson: Dislocated shoulder while giving his team mate a hug.

Other Wonderful Sports

John Furyk: Injured his neck while brushing his teeth.

Lee Trevino: Got struck by lightning.

Kevin Kyle: Received first degree burns on his pubic region when someone threw a pot of boiling water at him.

Dale Earnhardt: Accelerated.

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