Liver's NFL Week 7 Picks: Colts to Cover Against the Jags

 Everyone who needs money—just go straight to Michael Vick.

Word leaked this week that Wachovia Bank wants $940,000 that Vick borrowed. That’s in addition to the $2 million sought by a bank in Indiana, and the $2.3 million a Canadian bank is after.

To say nothing of the $19.9 million in bonus money the Falcons have their eyes on. 

In the “We could live without this” news: the overhead camera that crashed during the New Orleans-Seattle Sunday Night snoozer and delayed the game for 15 minutes.

An NFL spokesperson said, “We tried to get it back up as quickly as possible as it is one of the most popular angles for network TV and fans.”

Anyone out there in love with those camera angles? Sugar, Mr. Poon? 

Kudos to Joe Torre for turning down the Yankees pathetic PR stunt. That offer was an insult.

I’m not a Yankees fan by any stretch, but I’m a big Joe Torre fan. Now THERE's a Hall of Fame coach who presided over a dynasty with class and dignity. Bill Belichick couldn’t carry Torre's jock. 

On a serious note: Keep former Cowboy Ron Springs in your prayers.

Springs received a kidney from teammate Everson Walls earlier in the year—the first kidney transplant between two former U.S. pro athletes. He went in for “normal” removal of a cyst from his arm a week ago and has been in a coma ever since.

The man upstairs has dealt Springs some tough cards over the years (he also suffers from severe diabetes), but he's always stayed positive. That’s real toughness and courage.

Of course it goes without saying that the following picks AGAINST THE SPREAD are for RECREATIONAL USE ONLY. The Liver’s picks are to cover the spread, not straight-up winners. Only Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, Kiefer Sutherland, Michael Vick, Bill Belichick, and Travis Henry’s nine kids and nine mommas would be drunk enough to question the Esteemed Liver's picks.   

Last week’s record: 4-7-2  

2007 record against the spread: 36-46-7 

Sunday October 21, 2007

New England at Miami (+16 ½)

New England is a phenomenal team—possibly one of the greatest teams ever assembled.  
Unfortunately their coach is a scumbag.

As Dennis Hopper tells Christopher Walken in True Romance, “If that’s a fact, tell me, am I lying?”

On the bright side, at least we can make some good money on the Patriots for most of the season. Might as well pick them to cover every game...at least until they play the DEFENDING SUPER BOWL CHAMPS.

Hell, I’m happy Belichick is running up scores. That’s money in my pocket.  I can’t wait for the Jets rematch. The Pats might score a hundred in that game.

Pick: New England

Atlanta (+9) at New Orleans

So the Big Fat Pouter is starting at QB for the Falcons now, huh? Just when you were thinking it couldn’t get any worse for the poor city of Atlanta.

New Orleans finally won a game last week. If they can string together a few wins, they might not be completely dead...yet.

Don’t you get the feeling Bobby Petrino wants to pull a Zack Hutton from Skin Deep? When he mistakenly arrives dressed as a genie at an upscale party, John Ritter rubs his lamp saying, “Get me the [sic] outta here.”

Pick: Atlanta

San Francisco (+9) at N.Y. Giants

The Giants have won four in a row after an 0-2 start and are looking good on offense. I’m still not sold on little Eli and his “gift of blankness,” as Bodhi from Point Break would say, but Plaxico has been looking like a top-five receiver. 

San Francisco has struggled and is coming off a bye. Frank Gore hasn’t been able to get a running game going, and not having Alex Smith won't help matters.  

Pick: San Francisco

Arizona (+8 ½ ) at Washington

The Redskins gave away that Packers game last week—and NEED this win to stay in the NFC East hunt with Dallas and the Giants.

The Cardinals...THE CARDINALS...are currently tied with the Seahawks for the lead in the NFC West at 3-3. The Seahawks are playing the Rams this week, which means they're a lock...so a win for the Cardinals would be beneficial. 

Pick: Arizona

Tennessee at Houston (+1 ½)

The amazing Vince hasn’t practiced all week due to a leg injury suffered in the loss to Tampa last week.

That said, there’s no way he’s NOT gonna be on the field against the hometown team that still rues the day they passed him up.

Again, I’m changing my mind about not taking Reggie Bush. That might not have been such a dumb move. But passing on the Amazing Vince?

They should hand out a Charley Casserly Head-on-a-Stick to every Texan fan that walks into Reliant Stadium on Sunday.

Pick: Houston

Baltimore at Buffalo (+3)

This might be an educational game...if you want to demonstrate boring football, or use it while subjecting someone to the Ludovico Technique from A Clockwork Orange.  

Pick: Baltimore

Minnesota (+9 ½) at Dallas

The best way to rebound after a loss is with a win.

The game plan for the Cowboys is so simple here, it’s almost asinine: STOP ADRIAN PETERSON.

He’s the only weapon the Vikings have. Force Tarvaris Jackson to throw the ball and you’ll be fine. 

Score early (a novel thought for this Cowboys offense, I know) and eventually Minnesota will have to abandon the run. The Cowboys need to take care of business and go into the bye at 6-1 before a big Sunday night game at Filthy on November 4th.

Pick: Dallas

Tampa Bay (+2 ½) at Detroit

Detroit is coming off a bye and looking to stay in the NFC North race. The Lions defense has got to get better. They can score points—but if you give them right back, it doesn't help.

Tampa Bay is tied with Carolina for the NFC South lead at 4-2. The Panthers have their bye this week, so a Bucs win would mean a one-game edge.

Pick: Detroit

Kansas City (+2 ½) at Oakland

Both of these teams are STILL alive in the AFC West. This is one of the oldest NFL rivalries, and is usually good for some big hits—think of a fight scene from Braveheart.

Pick: Oakland

N.Y. Jets (+6) at Cincinnati

The Jets aren’t very good, but the Bengals have just flat out QUIT—and Marvin Lewis might be the fall guy.

Pick: Jets

Chicago (+5) at Philly

The loser of this game is in DEEP TROUBLE. Both teams need a win to even PRETEND to be in the hunt—even in the NFC.

Pick: Chicago

St. Louis (+9) at Seattle

St. Louis is already on the clock. If Seattle doesn’t cover this spread, Holmgren should force his players to jump into a vat of hot Starbucks coffee.

Pick: Seattle

Pittsburgh at Denver (+3 ½)

Anyone think NBC wants to flex this game?

The Broncos are awful, and a bye week isn’t going to solve their problems. Now does everyone understand why QBs with the “Duh” face—like Jay Cutler and Eli Manning—just don’t inspire confidence in me?

Pittsburgh has flown under the radar, which is just fine with them. Look for Willie Parker to run all night on the Broncos' 32nd-ranked rush defense.

Pick: Denver

Monday October 22, 2007

Indianapolis at Jacksonville (+3)

For once, the Monday night game is the best game of the week.

Jacksonville is right on Indy’s heels in the AFC South, and the Colts need to maintain their perfect record in order to keep pace with the Patriots for home field.  

The Jags always play the Colts tough, so expect a tight one. Just remember to hit the mute button so your ears won’t bleed.

Pick: Indy