Kobe Bryant is full of surprises.
From 81-point outings to five championship rings to ambiguous retirement musings, the Black Mamba lives to shock and awe.
Still rehabilitating a ruptured Achilles, Kobe's mantra hasn't changed. He's still intent on remaining unpredictable.
Knowing that the Los Angeles Lakers' season is over and he is in no shape to ambush us on the hardwood, Kobe is going to different lengths to surprise us; lengths that include unforeseen announcements, not buckets.
UPDATE: 7:00 AM ET by Ethan Norof
Kobe announced on Facebook that he and his wife Vanessa partnered up with Sports Spectacular "for a great cause."
Kobe and Vanessa's foundation will team up with Sports Spectacular for an event on August 15, 2013 at the Nokia theatre in Los Angeles.
End of Update
On Sunday, Bryant took to Facebook with a cryptic message in anticipation of another message that would inevitably follow.
Naturally, we're left confused. Is he retiring from the NBA? Eventually being amnestied? Requesting a trade?
Slow your roll.
This isn't going to be the Mamba's version of "The Decision." Unless that decision is something only half-major and non-basketball related, that is.
Had Kobe's impending announcement been a declaration of untold truths or something as groundbreaking as any of the above, chances are we would have heard whisperings of it by now.
But we haven't. It's been all clear on the paralyzing news front. And if it weren't, Kobe wouldn't be holding a "Livestream" to address it.
There would be a press conference, a foray of flashing cameras and likely some hors d'oeuvres as well. There won't be any of that, though. This isn't what that is.
Expect this video to be a menial bulletin then, something that is arguably important but not earth-shattering or worth fretting over.
It could have something to do with any of the charities he is currently working with.
Perhaps he's switched from boxers to briefs and wants to let us know. Or maybe he and Dwight Howard have custom-made best-friend bracelets for one another and he wants to show us.
We just don't know, but we will soon enough.
So please, don't get your boxers or briefs in a bunch trying to figure it out.