25 Worst Endorsement Commercials for NHL Players Ever

World-class athletes have the world in the palm of their talented hands. Not only are they compensated handsomely to display their gifts in a workplace that any of us would never call work, they get a ton of perks as well.

Large companies come calling, begging you to wear their shirt, hat, shoes or watch. Other businesses just want you to show up to drive their car, eat their food or rave about how their medication provides "supression, but not a cure." OK, so maybe you'll never see any athlete plugging a Herpes commercial, but imagine the irony.

How happy was Nike to get Michael Jordan's and Tiger Woods' signatures for their brand before Adidas? How long was the line to get Sidney Crosby's endorsement before Reebok got him? The best athletes have companies lining up to pay them lots and lots of money, money that can supplement a bank account long after the playing days become the glory days.

The most savvy of athletes surround themselves with smart people, though. Guidance and direction are crucial for young men and women who have lived a pretty charmed life with everybody telling them how great they are 24/7. People who aren't afraid to say no and make tough decisions can keep their clients wealthy and employable even after the athletic career has ended.

The knee-jerk for any young man or woman is to say yes to anyone ready to cut you a check for an hour of "work." It's easy money just by allowing someone to attach your name to a candy bar, clothing line or video game.

While some say that any publicity is good publicity, I would be willing to bet that a few of these guys would like mulligans for the following advertisements. While they were pitching solid products across the board, the message was often lost in the delivery.

Here's my 25 worst NHL-related commercials of all time. Enjoy now!

Coolest Game on Earth Gone Bad

Oh Adam Oates, the world is just full of ladies looking for love on the rebound from a slick-skating centerman with baby-soft hands. The NHL's "Coolest Game on Earth" campaign produced some gems for commercials, but then there was this one.

Please, more hockey metaphors.

The 'Stache Times 2?

This was a great idea in theory. An obvious remake of the Coca-Cola "Mean" Joe Greene commercial from the 1970s, you would think there would be some kind of decent writing given Anaheim's proximity to Hollywood.

The double mustache from the fan pack is a solid attempt to save this one, but George goes down swinging.

Somebody Please Fire the Coach

No NHL player in this ad series from the NHL Network, but the "Coach" series annoyed the crap out of me. At no point did I find any of these funny. In fact, it actually made me change the channel away from hockey when they came on.

Shame on you, NHL! These were horrible.

Alex Ovechkin for Eastern Motors

This train wreck shows up in just about every "Worst of" slideshow, so as much as I would love to omit it, I just can't. Why was this even recorded? I'm pretty sure this casual "outtake" version of the commercial was actually put on television in the D.C. area.

Good luck getting that crappy song out of your head.

Pavel Datstuk Eye Care

This beauty is a staple on Fox Sports Detroit. Red Wing fans can probably repeat it word for word, but they never get tired of watching it. The Rahmani Eye Institute would also employ the services of Wings captain Nick Lidstrom for a similar, more coherent piece.

Datsyuk sounds like he filmed this spot the same day his plane landed in America.

N.Y. Rangers Looking Sassy in Sasson

As if tucking your jersey into your designer jeans wasn't bad enough. The 1979 Rangers probably had to hear a bunch of crap from opponents for this one. In case half of 1979 missed the first version, Sasson released a second version for all to enjoy.

Max Talbot as a Pool Boy

Max Talbot plays a super knowledgeable pool boy in this spot from Valley Pool and Spa. Talbot is actually OK in front of the camera, but the commercial is just so cheesy. At least he doesn't dance in this one.

Wait, does that mean that there is a commercial with a dancing Max Talbot? You'll have to keep reading to find out.

Ron Hextall for Canada Dry

Maybe it's just me, but this spot from Ron Hextall seems like there might be more than just ginger ale in the bottle. Of the commercials involving Flyer goaltenders, this one has to be the worst. I'm not sure why this one loops twice.

L.A. Kings: Hollywood at Its Very Best

Another example of a commercial that seems like it was shot in someone's basement circa 1974.

The Kings play in the entertainment capital of the world, and this is the advertising that they barf out? At least at the end all three players get to yell "Go Kings!" holding up a hockey player with a fireworks backdrop.

I'm thinking this was a produced by Curtis Bruckheimer, Jerry's significantly less successful half-brother.

Kane and Toews Get Awkward

If you can make it through this commercial and not feel uncomfortable, you are a better person than me. Obviously fresh off a Stanley Cup victory, these two guys could make diarrhea medication commercials seem cool. Possibly.

I think it's the combination of the music, the narration and the bad acting, but any one of the three makes this piece of garbage awkward.

The Rocket Streaks...His Hair

"Hey, Richard, two minutes for looking so good!" That is all.

Georges Laraque for TekSavvy

I think this is a cell phone or cable service commercial, but I can barely understand fast-talking, French-Canadian Georges Laraque. My takeaway is that there are no contracts with Teksavvy, and that Georges should stick to punching people in the face.

Who Ordered the Swedish Twins?

I know this has shown up on other lists, too, but it's just so creepy. Never mind the buildup that this is some type of bachelor party environment, the commercial could have stopped with the door opening.

"Oh, I get it! Swedish twins!! I see what you did there!!" But it doesn't stop there, and it spirals into something awkward and terrifying.

Max Talbot Is a Superstar

Remember that earlier slide where I promised a dancing Talbot? Did I forget to mention his fu-manchu mustache? Another brilliant local ad for a Pittsburgh car dealership featuring Sergei Gonchar and Evgeni Malkin.

Could This Actually Happen?

OK, so there are two things that should disqualify this commercial from my list:

1. There is no NHL star endorsing any product.
2. This commercial is AWESOME!

My apologies.

Jagr as a Sex Symbol? Stop It!

This is some type of lottery commercial for the Czech Republic, obviously, because there are good-looking women and Jaromir Jagr dressed up as a fire marshal. The premise of the commercial seems to be that Jagr is so good-looking that this house full of models has to lure him to their compound with a false fire alarm.

Makes complete sense to me.

Kind of Funny, but Only Kind of

The funny part of this commercial is when they rag on each former player while they're picking teams, but the "Hockey Falls" commercials are right up there with the "Coach" commercials. Some were kind of funny, and some made me angry that the NHL couldn't do better.

McDonald's: Where Superstar Hockey Players Settle Bets

I might catch grief for throwing this one in here, but I hate it. I love Sundin and Gretzky, but this vehicle got played out with the Larry Bird and Michael Jordan commercials from the same era. Sundin's Nike ads were amazing, but this one is an old, tired dog.

Mike Bossy Looking for Work

It took me a minute, but I spotted Mike Bossy buying doughnuts in this weird Wonka-esque Dunkin' Donuts spot.

Why Isn't Hockey Popular in Phoenix?

Dear Phoenix Coyotes organization, puppets do not sell hockey tickets. Puppets and Wayne Gretzky do not sell hockey tickets. Do better, and do it soon, or you'll be the 2013-14 Hamilton Coyotes.

Lanny McDonald Pimping Some Fur

Nothing says classy like a dude with a giant soup strainer rocking a full-length chinchilla coat. When Lanny McDonald wasn't pitching Hungry Man dinners, he was rocking the endangered species overcoat for Benzings.

Dougie Gilmour with a Flake-Free Flow

Before there was Troy Polamalu and Joe Mauer pitching dandruff shampoo, there was little Dougie Gilmour and his mullet. Other than a heavy dosage of cheese from "Killer," this is a pretty legit ad spotlighting the Gilmour dandruff-free flow.

Sorry Stevie Y, I Just Can't Buy Your Ottoman

Steve Yzerman is my favorite player of all time, but this commercial is terrible and awkward. I've watched it about five times and wanted to like it, just for Stevie's sake. I didn't realize that Yzerman spent the offseason designing furniture and wearing mock turtlenecks.

Slap the name Yzerman on a sleeper sofa and it will sell like hotcakes. Hotcakes I say!

Mario Lemieux Promo

This could be the worst promotional commercial ever. I know Lemieux struggled with English in his early Pittsburgh years, but the child abduction growth chart is just plain creepy. By 1986, Super Mario's English was good enough to pimp some Chevys in Pittsburgh.

This one is just weird compounded by the kid overselling the disbelief that Mario Lemieux had broken into his house and was getting ready to kidnap him.

Wayne Gretzky 7-Up

The Wayne Gretzky 7-Up ads are timeless reminders of the Great One's acting chops. I'm not sure what is the most enjoyable part of the commercial—Gretzky pumping iron, the awesome jingle, the massive ice-filled tub of 7-Up or the joke at the end with the exaggerated laughter?

It's a top-shelf hit for the Gretzky brothers.

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