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Jeremy Lin and 5 NBA Players Who Need a Stylist

Gabe ZaldivarFeb 16, 2012

Jeremy Lin is fresh off a week of living on a couch and was just trying to make the Knicks' roster, so I understand the lack of swagger. It's time to fix all that. 

Here is a brief rundown on the athletes who need a makeover. Yes, dudes can do makeovers just as well as our female counterparts. 

Just because you rule the city that never sleeps doesn't mean you have to look like it. Lin has impressed and now it's time he looks impressive, and that means a complete and utter overhaul to his look. 

He is not the only one guilty of looking far more drab than we would like. The sports world is littered with guys that have no sense of style. 

It's time they take a page from Dwyane Wade and the old-school sensibilities of Amare Stoudemire. The ladies may love the high-flying antics, but they like the swagger even more. 

I am tired of looking at Pau Gasol's peach fuzz and Joakim Noah's pony tail. I love the NBA for a great many reasons. 

Dunks and last-second three-pointers are among them, but what really gets the blood pumping is making fun of these goofs that run the floor like Greg Oden on a treadmill. 

Here is our chance to implore otherwise. 

Perhaps they wouldn't get so much ridicule if they owned a new style. Let's dive deep into the worst hairstyles in the business. 

6. Jeremy Lin

1 of 6

I love me some Jeremy Lin. 

However, his hair looks like mine does when I wake up in the morning. He needs to either own it and start to grow this thing out, or shave it off and go sleek. 

Jeremy Lin would dominate with a freshly-shaved dome. OK, he is dominating now. He would dominate without looking awkward, how about that?

5. LeBron James

2 of 6

Speaking of a guy that needs to shave his head, welcome LeBron James to the party. He has a hairline brought to you by Tiger Woods. 

The man is rocking the George Costanza hard, and it's time to dispatch with it completely. There is only so much that a headband can do to hide a retreating mass of hair follicles. 

Clean shave it, James. That way we can make fun of your misshapen skull. Yay, us. 

4. Pau Gasol

3 of 6

What are you doing to me, Pau Gasol? Perhaps you wouldn't be called out for being soft if you didn't continue to rock Tom Selleck's thigh as your beard. 

Take a razor to that thing that looks like something I grew in high school. I can deal with blowing into your hands before every free throw like it was 30 degrees in the arena. I can even take the look on your face when you get called for an egregious foul. 

I can no longer take you seriously, though. At least, not in that beard. 

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3. Anderson Varejao

4 of 6

It doesn't bother me that he looks like Sideshow Bob, because I love The Simpson's. The problem is that he looks like Justin Guarini, because I hate American Idol

2. Chris Kaman

5 of 6

Chris Kaman is rocking the lesser-known dad look. He looks far too responsible for this league and could be the bald mixed with the beard all mixed with the pudgy frame. 

Chris Kaman isn't fat, but he looks like that one dude you pick second to last in a pickup game. "Yeah, I'll take the chubby white dude that looks like he can pass."

Also, not sure if Kaman has ever met the sun, but he could use a tan. Damn it, Hornets players, let Kaman outside every once in a while. 

1. Joakim Noah

6 of 6

Sigh. 

Look closely because we have a lot of work to do. Noah is seen here with teeth by Madonna and a hairstyle that is worn by thousands of basketball players across the nation. 

Only, those players are called high school girls and they wear it that way to keep the hair out of their eyes. I may be able to forgive that, but that beard looks like Pau Gasol's thigh. 

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