NFL Predictions Week 1: 3 Teams We Will Enjoy Making Fun of This Weekend

Let me tell you what my favorite pastime happens to be during the NFL season: It is sitting around, clowning the hapless squads that can't do anything right.

Week 1 happens to have some very promising games for just that cause. 

Kick up your feet, crack open a beer and ignore the Cheetos stain on your shirt. These games may be lopsided—they may even be uneasy to look at—but that doesn't mean we shouldn't rubberneck. 

The NFL is back, baby. And these teams' destruction will soon be my glee. 

1. Carolina Panthers

For once, it won't be the Arizona Cardinals being laughed at. Last year's clown car of horrible quarterbacks actually has a qualified arm in Kevin Kolb. 

I wish I could say the same for the Panthers.

Cam Newton will one day be an elite quarterback, or so I have been told. His time to shine will not be on Game 1 in his career. The Panthers will give the ball to the most inexperienced QB on their roster in Week 1. 

I imagine they are hoping to punt the season and draft Andrew luck. That way they can build the Mount Rushmore of young promising arms on a horrible team.

2. Miami Dolphins

I want to send the Dolphins a gift basket for all the good times they gave me last year. This team never got the memo that home field is considered an advantage.

On Monday night, we will see a beatdown that will actually be welcomed by Dolphins fans. Miami faithful will cry from the cheap seats and declare, "You see, we told you Chad Henne was garbage."

3. Washington Redskins

Do you know that feeling you had in little league when you felt that any little mistake would send you to the bench? I ask only because I was quite good in little league. 

Well, that feeling will be exactly what Rex Grossman feels as he passes the ball. Once he throws a pick, it will be the exact feeling John Beck feels when he throws the ball...and on, and on. 

Mike Shanahan has managed to find a new and inventive way to ruin the Redskins before the season even starts.