MLB Trading Deadline Postcard: A Letter to the Atlanta Braves

This is the second in a series of highly personal letters I am sending to teams of interest as we approach this year's trading deadline. Enjoy.

Dear Braves,

Why do you still employ Derek Lowe?

Let’s review. He’s your worst starting pitcher. He’s your least law-abiding starting pitcher. He’s your most expensive pitcher, by a long shot.

Despite all of these detriments a lot of teams could use a Derek Lowe. I’m thinking of certain pinstriped team desperate for starting pitching that embraces overpaid veterans the way peanut butter takes to jelly. Work a three-way deal with those guys and some non-contender whereby they get Lowe, you get the third team’s center-fielder (Michael Bourn?) and the third team gets a couple of prospects from the both of you.

And throw Nate McClouth in the deal too, because Nate McClouth is Nate McClouth.

With Lowe gone you can play pick-a-stud and promote either Mike Minor and Julio Teheran to take his place. Would you prefer the Jag or the Beamer? There are no bad choices here, either way you’re ditching the Chrysler Sebring Convertible with permanent paint chips.

What’s that? Your worried that a Lowe-less rotation will lack the “veteran presence” needed in a playoff series?

Yeah I guess the 2010 Giants regret losing the “veteran presence” of Barry Zito when they opted for the “actual talent” of Madison Bumgarner. And the 2003 Marlins, they’re probably still second-guessing the decision to pitch kids like Josh Beckett, Brad Penny, Dontrelle Willis and Carl Pavano when they could have fielded guys with more life experience.

Read through the sarcasm and get it together Bravos. Lowe can’t help you now, a big bat can. Make the trade.

Best,
Avi

PS - I made y’all some grits. They’re on the stove.