2011 NFL Draft Results: Grades for the Draft Day SuitsApril 29, 2011
2011 NFL Draft Results: Grades for the Draft Day Suits
Cam Newton could very well be the next Steve Young. He could be the next Ryan Leaf.
But what’s the most important is how he’ll be remembered. Or, to be precise, how he looked. No matter how good or awful all of the top 2011 NFL Draft picks do, inevitably their New York moment of shaking Roger Goodell’s hand will be endlessly replayed on SportsCenter as their career paths are dissected.
It’s like their prom nights: they dress to the nines, the pictures will be framed, but instead of going home with an outrageous dinner bill and nothing but a kiss on the cheek, they come home with a massive new contract.
For this, they must look their best.
Some will don suits that even James Bond would nod in approval at, and some, well, some will just wind up here.
So who passed the fashion police’s test and who will live in Craig Sager-levels of infamy?
Dishonorable Mention: Roger Goodell
Roger Goodell was booed to no end on Thursday night. He tried, to very, very little avail, to get the crowd involved.
Fittingly, his tie looked like bars on a jail cell. You’re trapped with the vitriol, Roger, at least until NFL fans can be at ease in knowing that there will actually be a season.
Bleacher Report’s resident related-content bad ass Jeff Kneis has a saying: “Never trust a man with slicked back hair.”
Forget what Gabbert wore to the podium, aside from the fact he was the third to try the grey-white-black combo—cut your hair, son.
He looked like some twisted combination of Sunshine from “Remember the Titans” and sleazy basketball coach Pete Bell (Nick Nolte) from “Blue Chips.”
It’s a shame he didn’t get drafted by the Yankees, not the Jaguars. That do would not fly in Yankee Stadium.
A.J. Green’s suit looked about as gloomy as his face did when he found out he was headed to the Bengals.
He made headlines for auctioning off his Georgia jersey while he was in college, and he looked like he’d rather be wearing said jersey than the ho-hum black and purple suit he wore to the podium. His purple tie made him look like some sort of depressed version of Barney.
Cheer up, A.J., you’ll be wearing a hue of red again in no time.
Aldon Smith’s blue-and-yellow digs were about as enthusiastic as the reaction most San Francisco 49ers fans’ when Smith’s named was called: boooooooorrrrrrrriiiiiiiiinnnnnnng.
Hey Ryan Kerrigan, you get to leave Indiana!
I mean, try and at least act like you care. No color, no emotion and a crew cut gets you absolutely no love around these parts.
Let us know when you’re ready to be less boring.
Mike Pouncey is a large man expected to do big things for the Miami Dolphins.
He kept it simple with an all-beige look and an aggressive blue-checkered tie. It won’t get in on the cover of GQ, but he also won’t get invited to any of Clinton Portis’ fashion parties.
No doubt, Prince Amukamara was a solid pick to bolster the New York Giants’ secondary.
What was, puzzling, however, is Amukamara’s choice of color. I mean, an orange tie with an orange shirt? Sure, you were the first to hit the podium looking like the peach in James and the Giant Peach, but I always appreciate when kids give some sort of an ode to their alma maters.
Like a tip of the cap of sorts: “Hey, I’m rich now, thanks, guys.”
So why would Amukamara decide to don the color of Nebraska’s sworn enemy?
Didn’t the young Canadian from Baylor get the memo?
Purple’s played out already.
Luckily, Danny Watkins rescued his been-there-done-that look with a nice homage to the milliatary.
Purple was by far the prevalent color theme on the NFL Draft’s opening night. You can’t blame the man’s wardrobe on the team that picked him.
That said, a burnt orange hat on a humongous Phil Taylor decked out in dark purple and, well, let’s just say it’s going to insult the fireplace it one day hangs over.
The suit itself, not bad at all. Just the stars didn’t align right for the mammoth Baylor product.
Marcell Dareus’ pick by the Buffalo Bills wasn’t a big attention-grabber. Most assumed that the Bills coveted Miller, so Dareus’ clean, non-attention grabbing look made sense.
But hey, you don’t always have to be outlandish. Sometimes clean, simple and classic works.
The light beige with the classic black-and-white look worked well for Dareus. Especially since he’ll soon be wearing the bright blue and red in Buffalo.
I’d make a crack about the simplicity of Corey Liuget’s simple threads, but he looks like he might eat me.
No, really, something about an old-school almost tuxedo-like look works so much better with large, dominant men.
It’s a good thing we’re a big fan of Carolina’s black-and-baby blue threads. Because Cam Newton’s draft-day attire was, well, boring.
Maybe he just knew he was going to Carolina so he felt the need to work some baby blue into his attire.
That said, the pink tie looks sharp, but it’s simply way too fratty for our taste. Then again, he’ll be joined at the hip with Jimmy Clausen, so maybe he’s just trying to fit into the frat-boy lifestyle right away.
Bad omen that Adrian Clayborn’s Buccaneers hat didn’t fit because his head was too big?
Absolutely not. It just adds to the Iowa defensive end’s mystique and intimidation.
Add to the equation that his tie prophetically was Bucs’ colors? Not a bad effort, young man.
Purple threads were a recurring theme on draft night, and Von Miller was the first one to rock the look on stage.
Sure, chants of “overrated” rang through the Bleacher Report office when the pick was made, but the purple-ish look with the red Steve Urkel-esque glasses was a brash one.
And I, for one, dug it. And since the Broncos unis are a classic look, too, he pulled off a draft-night stylistic double.
Tyron Smith’s attire reflected what typically the selection of the first offensive lineman reflects: It’s less than ballyhooed, but it absolutely gets the job done and usually falls under the radar.
Smith went for simplicity with the grey, black and white clean look.
He gets extra points for the USC-gold pocket square as subtle nod to his alma mater.
Was Patrick Peterson sending a message to the world when the All-American rocked the first, fresh American-looking suit?
Who cares. It looked fresh.
Peterson’s blue checkers with the white french collar and the bright (Cardinal) red tie was a clean look suited well for the player most pegged as the best talent in the draft.
The blue-on-blue-on-blue look that J.J. Watt decided to go with looked sharp to begin with to go along with the black jacket.
When he got drafted by the Houston Texans and put on the Texans’ bright red hat? The powerful Wisconsin defensive end had a powerful look going for him.
Hey, Mark Ingram, it’s not Valentine’s Day.
And does anyone actually think it signifies a budding love affair New Orleans is about to have with Ingram considering how much the Saints gave up for the ex-Heisman winner just for a third running back in a pass-heavy offense?
But that takes absolutely nothing away from the fact that Ingram chose a bad-ass suit to wear.
Sometimes you have to go outside the realm of boring. Ingram’s three-piece outfit meshed a perfect blend of black, red, white and pink. Sure, he kind of looked like he belonged on a Hallmark card, but it worked.
Whoa, it takes some serious cajones to go where few have gone before: plaid underneath a dress jacket.
But that’s exactly what Cal-product Cameron Jordan wore on stage. But hey, outlandish works if it’s pulled off correctly. It makes sense, considering Jordan spent his collegiate years in eccentric Berkeley.
His beige jacket even paired perfectly with his gold Saints cap and his red plaid shirt underneath. Even better? It was clearly San Francisco 49ers colors. Now that will earn you extra points around these parts.
Did Julio Jones know that the Atlanta Falcons would trade up and grab the prolific Alabama receiver?
Perhaps he could see the future by rocking the dark shade of red eerily reminiscent to the hue the Falcons wear on game day.
Team affiliation notwithstanding, what’s not to like about Jones’ wardrobe choice? Grey-and-white stripes with a silver bowtie? Fortune favors the bold, and I favor Jones’ suit.
Bravo, Mr. Fairley. Bra-freaking-vo.
The black glasses, the Lions’ silver and blue, the bow tie. There was nothing wrong with this. Nothing. In fact, the combination almost makes him look like a bigger, meaner version of Mega Man.
Fairley was apparently underrated by scouts by falling all the way to No. 13. What won’t be underrated? His getup.
Everything was right about this—he was the early-round steal and should be a terror on the Lions’ defensive line for years to come.