Los Angeles Clippers Aren't Following the Script; Go From Potential To Pathetic

Well, this isn’t how it was supposed to go.

Someone altered the script. Some big-wig got a hold of my perfect Hollywood story and decided to add a little drama. It’s Hollywood after all, stuff like that happens.

Instead of storming out of the gate in the 2010-2011 NBA season, the Clippers have stumbled and appear to have fallen flat on their faces. Same ole Clippers indeed.

If the Clippers had followed my game plan they would be 2-2. Sure, nothing earth-shattering, but it looks better than the big ZERO they are carrying in the W column now, right? I had them taking down the Warriors on the road then finally beating the Spurs at home.

It was that win that was supposed to propel the Clippers into the “Hey, maybe they don’t totally suck after all” column. Again, nothing all that wonderful there, but the censors won’t let me accurately describe the column they sit in now.

Instead of following my carefully detailed story-line however the Clippers went the way the Clippers always tend to go. They look great on paper, but stink it up on the court. They play well, but only in spurts.

The Clippers are kind of like that girl you notice after summer vacation. She was always pretty homely, but there was something about her this year. She is still pretty homely and everyone thinks you are crazy for thinking something is there, but you can’t shake it, there is something about her.

Every now and again, she walks just the right way, or she laughs with a twinkle or maybe the sun hits her just right and you think…wow. Then, she trips, you notice the spinach in her teeth and the sun hits her all wrong and you think…Ugh.

Same ole Clippers.

I’m not ready to throw in the towel yet however. The season is too young and the team really does have potential. No really.

There are spurts when they move the ball with precision, when they play defense with intensity; there are moments when the sun hits them just right. There is still hope, but its time for everyone in the organization to realize that if they don’t do their part, the season could quickly get away from them.

The players have to take everything that’s being read and said personally. It’s corny, but why not start the season over. Why not? Clipper players, you have a do-over. You are 0-0 and open the season against the Thunder on 11/3/10—go get em!

The coaches have to stop accepting mediocrity from any player. Anything less than full-out hustle gets you a seat next to Jack Nicholson. Oops, wrong LA celebrity. I’d say he gets a seat next to Rondell Sheridan, but Mr. Sheridan doesn’t sit courtside.

He’s a huge fan, but smart enough to not sit that close.

The G.M. has to bring in re-enforcements. If he can swing a deal for Carmelo Anthony, do it. Anyone on the roster with the exception of Blake Griffin or Eric Gordon is available and can be Colorado bound in no time. If the Nuggets ask too much for ‘Melo, well then find the team a suitable small forward.

It almost doesn’t much matter what G.M. Neil Olshey does, as long as he does something!

Owner Donald Sterling has a role to play too. I’ll lay it out in order of most important to the team. 1- Sell the team. 2- Stay away from the games and locker-room. 3- Sell the team.

Finally, we fans have the most important job of all, we have to stay positive. I know how much ridicule you take for flying that Clipper flag or wearing the Clipper jersey, but keep it up. Stop coming up with excuses like “My Laker gear is at the cleaners, so, I threw this on.”

Stand up and proclaim the truth, loud and proud, “My name is [insert your name here] and I’m a Clipper fan!!!”

Feel better?

The worst thing about the Clippers slow start is that three of the four games were at home. After the Thunder game, they go on a four game road trip to Denver, Utah, New Orleans and San Antonio.

It’s time the team follow my script. They need to take down the Thunder then go 3-1 on the road. That will bring the Clippers back to Staples at 4-5 and we will look past the horrible start.

If not, well, this is Hollywood, so if the bad numbers continue we are going to have to cancel you. Either that or relegate you to the 1am time slot behind George Lopez.

Either way, the season is lost.