2007 NBA Draft: One Man's Blow-by-Blow

The 2007 NBA Draft is finally upon us—and the only word I can use to describe the feeling is "relieved"...because I won't have to listen to any more Kevin Garnett speculation for at least one evening.

I'm coming to you live from my living room in beautiful Dallas, TX, joined by my buddies John and Jason for some rousing draft coverage.

Since our beloved Mavericks won't be picking until 34, I'm free to analyze (read: butcher) every other team's decisions for a solid two hours...until mine screws up.

For the record, I'm hoping to nab either my boy Gabe Pruitt or Big Baby Davis at 34; either one would be phenomenal.

With all that said, let's go to the action...

They go 1-for-1 to start the evening—taking Al, who gives them a very credible low-post scoring option.

*After Memphis takes Mike Conley at 4, news of the Sonics-Celtics Ray Allen extravaganza hits the airwaves, leading John (who doubles as a Celtics fan...don't ask me why) to run around the room shrieking in delight. This prompts me and Jason to make a list of Eastern Conference teams still better than the Celts—final tally: 7.

The Sonics grab Jeff Green with the pick, planing to use him, Durant, and hopefully Rashard Lewis at the same time. How they plan on stopping two-guards on defense with that lineup is beyond me. For Boston's part, it's a pretty desperate attempt to gain some relevance—they'll make the playoffs, but barely.

*Milwaukee calls Yi's bluff and takes him at the 6 spot. When asked for a description of Yi's talents, Fran Fraschilla describes him as "hip hop" and "50 Cent." Wow.

*Following the Wolves' very easy pick of Corey Brewer, Charlotte takes Brandan Wright at 8...only to later trade him to Golden State for Jason Richardson. Two thoughts here:

1. The Bobcats are putting together a pretty interesting team. With Okafor, May, Felton, Hermann, the newly-added Jared Dudley, and Gerald Wallace (if they can keep him), they have a gritty nucleus. J-Rich, who was averaging 24 a night two years ago, gives them a real scorer.

Is it phenomenal? No, but they're in the East, so it's enough to contend for the playoffs

2. Why does Golden State get Brandan Wright when he doesn't appear to fit their system (no jumper, no hustle, not a very good rebounders)? My answer: Because they aren't planning on using him.

Nellie was salivating over Yi, and I would bet good money that they're planning on using Wright as the center of a package to force Milwaukee's hand and get Yi away from the Bucks.

Very risky—but if it works, give them credit.

*Two bad fits at 9 and 10: Noah to Chicago and Hawes to Sacramento.

We'll start with Noah, whose Draft Day appearance Jason likened to a "black, bow-tied version of Carrot Top." Chicago needs interior scoring in the worst way, but now has three guys in Noah, Ben Wallace, and COTT (that's Completely Overrated Tyrus Thomas for those not in the know) who can't score in the paint and who can't play together.

Why they didn't offer the pick and some contracts to Portland for Zach Randolph is beyond me, especially since the Blazers gave him up for 12 cents on the dollar (more on that later).

For Sacramento, this pick is a disaster. Sure, Brad Miller is aging badly, but so too are Bibby and Artest...and since the latter two are getting shipped out this summer, why not take Al Thornton or Nick Young (two guys who can score now) instead of a project center who has very limited upside?

Latest in a string of bad decisions for this franchise.

*Lighting strikes twice—Atlanta grabs Law at 11! Glad to see at least one normally incompetent exec had a good draft. If they clean up the Childress-J.Smith-Marvin situation, the Hawks will be back in the playoffs in short order.

*Time for our favorite incompetent GM, Billy King.

Let's see—the Sixers have waning attendance and need a pure scorer, so Thornton or Young would be perfect here. Naturally, the Sixers— "braintrust" (and my use of that term is as loose as Paris Hilton) screws it up with a project forward in Thaddeus Young.

Yes, he's athletic and has "upside," but he isn't as good as either Thornton or Young right now...and it's a gamble that his offensive skill-set will be as complete as theirs' in the future. This could be a Darius Miles redux.

*Julian Wright to New Orleans at 14. Good player, does a lot of good things, but I'm not sure he's the right fit for the Hornets. 

Young would have been perfect for what they need—a two-guard who can score from anywhere on the court and create his own shot; he and Chris Paul would be lethal together.

Still, Wright is talented, so it's not a total loss.

*Three great fits with the next three picks: Thornton to the Clippers, Rodney Stuckey to Detroit, and Young to Washington.

The Clippers badly need an offensive jolt, and Thornton will give them that—especially if the Clips create a scoring void by dealing Corey Maggette. For the Pistons, Stuckey fits well as a scorer off the bench who can play the 1 and the 2. Finally, Washington gets the steal of the draft thus far in Young; they needed a two-guard and a scorer apart from their Big 3, and Young fills the bill perfectly.

*Next two picks: Sean Williams to New Jersey and Marco Belinelli to Golden State—both good fits with big potential.

The latter rings especially true for Williams; it's hard to really appreciate his upside until you watch him block shots. Don't forget that Williams was running away with the Defensive Player of the Year Award before he got kicked off the BC team.

*BREAKING NEWS FROM LAKERS CAMP: Jim Gray reports that Jerry Buss wants to improve his team and does not want to trade Kobe Bryant! Shocking!

Meanwhile, rather than give Kobe some help, the Lakers use the 19th pick on the 2007 Reece Gaines award winner, Javaris Crittenton.

Somewhere in LA, Kobe has started drinking heavily.

On the plus side, Stephen A. Smith is a comedy house of fire; when asked how he'd feel if he were in Phil Jackson's shoes, his only response is, and I quote, —They're wasting my time! I want to go back to Montana and ride my motorcycle!—

This is about the point where John, Jason, and I began using the mute button as the Stephen A. Silencer.

*Miami and Philly trade picks, giving the Heat Daequan Cook and the Sixers Jason Smith. Cook is the reach of the night so far. Philly gets a steal this late with Smith—I can't see much of a difference between his game and Yi's.

Don't get too excited, Sixers fans—the whiff on the Thaddeus Young pick was a microcosm of the entire franchise

*Jared Dudley to Charlotte. Gave my thoughts on this team earlier; suffice it to say I like this pick. If you want more on Dudley, check out my All-Defensive Team—he's the captain.

*Time for the story of the night: Isiah Thomas. He picks Wilson Chandler, whom I honestly know nothing about. But then, for the first time in recorded history, and before I type this next phrase I want everyone to know that the odds of this going down were worse than those of my buying UCLA season football tickets...

Isiah HEISTED someone!

Simply making a good trade would have been remarkable enough, but this is highway robbery.

I realize that Portland saved a ton of cap room...and that Channing Frye is a good rotation big man...and that Zach Randolph is certifiably insane...but he averaged 23 and 10!

I refuse to believe that this is the best offer out there for him—the Lakers would have bit for Lamar Odom; New Jersey for Richard Jefferson; Chicago for the 9 pick, Chris Duhon, and another body; or best of all, Washington for Antawn Jamison, which would have given the Baby Blazers a veteran leader who can play small forward and score.

And after that, they don't even get a first round pick for the guy!?

Final thought on this: Included in the negotiations was the Knicks' acquiring the rights to the title "craziest franchise in the league" from Indiana by way of the Blazers. With Randolph, Eddy Curry, and Marbury on the same squad, there's potential for a pregame locker room riot. I think David Lee might actually get shanked.

Nonetheless, it's worth mentioning that a Randolph-Curry-Lee frontcourt is nasty; not Eastern Conference nasty, actual nasty nasty. The Knicks just made the list of Eastern Conference teams that are better than the Celtics; John subsequently breaks into tears.

*The first round is winding down, so let's go to some speed reads:

Portland (from Phoenix): Rudy Fernadez — Probably staying overseas for another year, but looks pretty athletic. Enough upside to make Jay Bilas drool.

Utah: Morris Almond — The next Allen Houston; would have killed for the Mavs to get him. Best pure shooter in the draft, and will help solidify the two-guard spot for Utah.

Houston: Aaron Brooks — Sorry, I blacked out; thought we were in the second round. We're not? Well then...

Detroit: Arron Afflalo — Tough, gritty defender who wins; sounds like a Piston.

San Antonio: Tiago Splitter — Talented foreign player who will be stashed away for a year before cracking the rotation; sounds like a Spur.

Phoenix: Alando Tucker — Personally, I'm a huge fan of the new Suns regime right now—who turned several horrifying scenarios (for me as a Mavericks fan) into the annual sale of their top pick and the wasted selection of a 6'5" small forward who can't shoot. Meet the new boss, same as the old boss.

Portland (from Philly): Petteri Koponen — Gabe is officially pissed that he didn't stick around for his senior year. Koponen, meanwhile, looks like the cheerful sort...and by that, I mean so happy that Darius Miles might punch him in the face for smiling too much.

*Second round time, and with the 32nd pick my man Pruitt lands in Boston. For the three of you still reading this, you can refer back to my All-Underrated Team for an explanation of why I keep bringing this guy up.

Boston is actually a great landing spot for him; barring Danny Ainge bringing in some veteran help, Pruitt's competition for the starting point guard job is Rajon Rondo.

I don't want to insinuate that Rajon can't shoot or anything, but I probably could dust him in a game of HORSE.

While I'm digesting all of this, John is desperately trying to seduce me into joining his incestuous Mavs-Celts love bandwagon; I respond by telling him that if I wanted to root for a team that could finish 9th in the East, I'd simply push for USC to join the NBA.

*In order to adequately convey our collective enthusiasm for the Mavericks impending selection, I've brought in The Rock to proclaim the following:

"FINALLY...the Mavericks...HAVE COME BACK...to the NBA Draft..."

Alright! Big Baby is still on the board, and God knows we need a post threat. We cut to Russ Granik's replacement:

"With the 34th pick in the 2007 NBA Draft, the Dallas Mavericks select Nick Fazekas, forward, Nevada."

UGH.

If I could have envisioned a nightmare scenario for this pick, this would have been it. Well, this or Josh McRoberts. But, mostly this.

Give the Mavs credit—Fazekas slides seamlessly into a role that we've utilized extensively for the past two seasons. Unfortunately, that role can be best described as —Dirk's Random White Backup Who Possesses the Same Skill Set, With 1/8th the Talent and 8 Times the Weaknesses.

Congratulations, Nick, you've inherited a torch carried by such luminaries as Keith Van Horn and Austin Croshere.

Are we trying to get better? I mean, are we?

Final Mavs note: We end up dealing for Orlando's pick and drafting Reyshawn Terry. Good player who could end up being a rotation guy. I'd be more excited, but seeing as how we probably could have dealt this pick, Fazekas, and 20 bucks to Portland for Zach Randolph...I can't help but being underwhelmed.

*So there you have it—my blow-by-blow account of the NBA Draft. Hope you all enjoyed it, because the KG rumors will be back in full force by Sunday afternoon. Until next time.

 

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