The Doctor's Weekly Raw Recap: The 149 Things We Learned, Loved and Hated

Tonight's Raw was certainly a show with a lot packed into the two-hour broadcast. There was advancement in just about every major feud in WWE right now.

Jack Swagger defeated Zack Ryder to become the new US Champion only to have his butt kicked by Cena later in the show in a great showing of aggression from Cena.

Perez Hilton made a useless cameo during the tag team match between the Bellas and K2 and Alicia Fox. The Bellas ended up shoving him to the ground to a little bit of a pop from the crowd who obviously did not care for Hilton being there.

Jericho was booked to make his first appearance in a match since returning, only to walk out right after being tagged in. CM Punk ended up beating Otunga and Henry when Foley came to his rescue, only to have the decision reversed by John Laurinaitis.

R-Truth won a four man over-the-top-rope challenge by eliminating Sheamus, Barrett and Miz. Brodus Clay also had another good showing in a squash match against JTG.

Each week I recap Raw with a long list which is equal parts humor, recap, revelations, speculation, predictions and results. So please sit back and enjoy this week's list of the 149 things we learned, loved and hated from Monday Night Raw.

1. We start off with a video package commemorating the life of Martin Luther King Jr.
2. Awesome, Mick Foley is out to start the night off
3. Whoa, Daniel Bryan and CM Punk vs Mark Henry and Dolph Ziggler should be a pretty good match
4. Foley discusses not being a physical performer since he came back
5. Foley talks about the match that was featured in Beyond the Mat where Foley's kids and wife had to walk out crying
6. Sweet, Foley wants to be in the Royal Rumble
7. Now I have a new favorite to win the whole thing
8. Vickie and Dolph come out to major heat
9. Who else is hoping Vickie gets a taste of Mr. Socko?
10. Ziggler asks why Foley should be allowed to take a spot in the Rumble from another superstar
11. He has kind of a good point
12. Ziggler makes a joke about Foley's kids
13. Mick still wants to perform in order win the Rumble
14. I have to say this, Vickie has really done a great job getting back in shape, she is no Eve Torres in the looks department but she is no longer the pig she was two years ago
15. Maybe all of the fat jokes actually pushed her to get healthier
16. Ziggler yells at Foley to go away
17. Punk's music hits and he comes out to a big pop
18. Punk is wearing shorts over his trunks, which is something more wrestlers should do when wearing just a shirt and wrestling gear
19. Ziggler says Foley and Punk got their clothes from the same homeless guy
20. Punk talks about he and Foley being unconventional
21. He accuses Ziggler of hiding behind Vickie
22. He also says Vickie is a poor excuse for a woman
23. The crowd loved that
24. Why did Punk make fun of Ziggler's pink shirt? Many guys wear pink
25. Punk calls Johnny Ace a cross dresser, classy move Punk
26. Punk thinks it would be cool to main event WrestleMania with Foley
27. He is right, it would be cool
28. Funkhauser comes out and interrupts
29. When he starts to say his insanely long title, the crowd starts booing
30. He tells Foley he will not be in the Rumble
31. Vickie laughs in Foley's face as Super Dave walks to the back
32. Remember Super Dave Osbourne? One of the best shows ever
33. They mention Epico and Primo winning the titles at a live event
34. Air Boom will get their rematch next
35. I think titles should change hands once in a while at live events, it would make people want to go more if they thought it was actually possible for someone to lose a title off of TV
36. Whoa, Rosa is looking amazing in her little semi-bondage attire
37. The Back Stabber Primo gave Bourne in the video from the live event was awesome, Bourne pretty much back flipped from it
38. Cole just said Rosa is the brains of the team, that is priceless
39. Lawler somewhat disagrees
40. Epico and Primo retain in a short but decent match
41. Should have been longer
42. I really hope the Usos get a title shot at The Rumble
43. I am shocked Lawler could contain himself from screaming "PUPPIES" at Rosa
44. We go backstage and Super Dave is talking to The Folder's Soldier David Otunga (Credit to Brian Weaver for that nickname)
45. He tells someone they are in a six man tag team match in the main event
46. It's JERICHO!
47. He turns off the lights and makes his jacket light up to a little pop from the crowd
48. I wonder if he will turn on his team
49. The movie Safe House looks like it could be decent from the commercial they play
50. A commercial airs for Sin City SmackDown
51. Ryder has his ribs taped after last week's attack
52. He is scheduled to defend his title tonight despite being injured and not cleared
53. I thought the attack on Ryder was supposed to keep him off TV for a few weeks?
54. They replay the attack from last week
55. Swagger is out first for the US title match
56. They show the botched count from last week
57. It is great that they are making this part of the storyline instead of sweeping it under the rug
58. Ryder cant even Woo Woo Woo without grabbing his back as he makes his way to the ring
59. The side plates on the US title look like a new design
60. Swagger is really working Ryder's back in this match
61. I just realized this is the second match with women managers involved tonight, a nice change
62. Managers need to make a comeback in WWE
63. Where's Harvey Whippleman and Brother Love when you need them
64. Swagger wins the US title after three power bombs
65. Ryder kicking out a couple times from Swagger's finisher, which actually makes him look strong even though he lost
66. This felt too quick for a title match, not even one commercial break in the middle
67. I wonder if Ryder upset someone, they seem to be setting him up to be off TV for a little bit
68. Why the hell is Perez Hilton here?
69. At least he looks like a normal person for once
70. Seriously, I can't stand this guy
71. Neither can the audience apparently
72. He introduces Alicia Fox and K2 vs The Bellas
73. they are wearing those catsuits againnnnnnn
74. Sorry, lost focus for a second
75. Perez drags one of the Bellas out if the ring after they try and pull their switch
76. What was the point of having him out here at all tonight?
77. One of the Bellas shoves him to the ground
78. I am now a Bella fan after that
79. They replay Flair's Rumble win from 1992
80. They must be loosening their policy on showing TNA talent just for him
81. Truth is out next but gets interrupted by Wade Barrett
82. Truth tries his best to do a British accent, he failed
83. He says little Jimmy thinks Wade talks funny
84. "Don't WHAT me, Okay, WHAT me"
85. They show some slides from Truth visiting Disneyland
86. Pinnochio's nose grows after predicting Barrett will win the Rumble
87. Line of the night, Truth says "I don't even know if that is PG"
88. Cole cracked up at that one
89. Miz attacks from behind and he and Barrett double team him before Sheamus comes out for the save
90. Teddy Long comes out to no doubt make this a tag team match
91. Oh, I am wrong, its an over the top rope challenge
92. Truth wins
93. He does a little victory dance
94. Truth winning the rumble would be a huge surprise and a good move by WWE
95. Cena is backstage complaining to Laurinaitis about Ryder being forced to defend his title
96. JL admits it was a mistake, but he changes the subject to Kane and makes a one-on-one match for the Rumble
97. Cena will also get to face Swagger next, making Swagger pull double duty tonight
98. Vickie's wrestlers like wrestling twice a night apparently, Ziggler did it two PPVs in a row last year
99. Cena beats the crap out of Swagger before the match even starts
100. Seeing this aggressive side of Cena is awesome
101. So let me get this straight, they have Swagger win a title and then have Cena bury him?
102. And just when I thought Swagger would have a new push with the US title
103. Cena looks like he was going to curb stomp Swagger before deciding to grab the steel steps
104. Kane's music hits to interrupt and saves Swagger from getting sandwiched between two sets of steps
105. Kane is on screen saying Cena will have embraced the hate by their match at the Rumble
106. They show a commercial for the Rumble but one clip of a battle Royal was clearly from a SmackDown show
107. Brodus Clay is out next to a introduction by his dancers
108. I love his theme song, I just caught myself grooving to it a little bit
109. I am willing to bet no one is having as much fun in the WWE as Brodus is with this gimmick, he looks really happy
110. His opponent is JTG in what will no doubt be another squash
111. This match was ridiculous in every way and I loved every second of it
112. As he celebrates I can spot a few "Somebody call my momma" signs in the audience, I am glad the crowd is taking to him
113. I swear I just saw Haystacks Calhoun in the audience, which I know is impossible
114. Does anyone even know what I am talking about?
115. YES! Archer is back on FX this Thursday, best cartoon for adults ever made
116. They replay the AJ incident from SmackDown, why couldn't Show's acting be that good in Knuckleheads?
117. Bryan is out and he accuses Big Show of purposely hurting AJ
118. This is the most convincing Bryan has been in his heel persona, he is winning me over and I was against his heel turn
119. The main event is starting, I wonder what they have planned
120. The lights dim and the crowd goes nuts as Jericho comes out
121. I just noticed Mr Belding at ringside, nice
122. I wonder if Haskins will be involved with WWE at all, there have been rumors for weeks
123. Its interesting that Bryan is on the babyface team tonight
124. Bryan and Ziggler botch a leapfrog but like the pros they are they recover nicely
125. Jericho gets tagged in and he riles up the crowd and then tags in Bryan and leaves
126. This is a little strange
127. Henry and Bryan fight to the back, leaving CM Punk against Ziggler and Otunga
128. Foley's music hits and he comes out to be Punk's partner
129. Foley gets the tag and starts hammering Otunga
130. He hits the double arm DDT on Otunga
131. Mr. Socko is back!
132. He wins the match for his team with the mandible claw
133. Johnny Ace comes out and says he never approved Foley getting in the match
134. He reverse the decision
135. Punk gets right in his face
136. Ha, Punk tells him to take his balls out of his purse
137. He talks about JL never being any success in wrestling
138. He mentions that his brother was one of the Road Warriors
139. This promo from Punk is his best in months
140. JL looks pissed as Punk walks to the back
141. He grabs the mic, repeats his title and says he won't be intimidated
142. Foley asks him to admit that he will screw Punk at the Rumble
143. JL looks like he wants to punch someone
144. He admits he wants to screw Punk and he is sick and tired of being pushed around
145. This is the most emotion he has shown ever
146. This is awesome, he is really coming into his own as a corporate heel
147. He blasts Foley in the head with the mic and walks out
148. I am a full-blown fan of this guy now, he gets more entertaining every week
149. I am going to check out that Alcatraz show on my DVR and then head off to bed, good night everyone

Please feel free to share your thoughts and additions to the list below.