Every MLB Team's Best Hitter and the Walk-Up Music They Should Use

Being a regular frequenter of Yankee Stadium, there's nothing more awesome than the sound of Twisted Sister's "I Wanna Rock" blasting each time first baseman Mark Teixeira comes up to the plate.

In fact, it can be argued that walk-up music plays a big role in the fans' liking certain players. For example, former Mets first baseman Todd Zeile, despite being an average player, had tons of fans because of his use of Jimi Hendrix's "Purple Haze."

That being said, what if batters' walk-up music was associated with them in some way? You know, like it had something to do with who they were, and I'm not talking about the generic salsa that played at Shea Stadium and Citifield whenever Jose Reyes came to bat. As a Yankees fan, I'd love to hear Robinson Cano (pictured) enter to some song that best fits his clutch performance and fearless approach.

Thus, as a belated Christmas present to all of you, DJ Josh is going to give fire up the turntables. Here is each team's best all-around hitter (sorry, Dan Uggla fans) and the walk-up music they should use.

Arizona Diamondbacks: Justin Upton, Ring of Fire

It's hard to pick a good walk-up song for Justin Upton, who hit .289 with 31 home runs and 88 RBI last year for the Arizona Diamondbacks. I thought of using "Brother For Sale" by The Olsen Twins as a jab at his brother B.J., an outfielder for the Tampa Bay Rays, who always seems to be on the trading block, but then I realized two things: I'm no longer in second grade, and taking a shot at the other Upton brother is just plain mean.

Thus, given how Upton plays in Arizona, known for its blistering hot desert weather, why not use this classic tune by the Man in Black himself, Johnny Cash? It fits the environment where Upton's team plays, and even though it has a bit of a happy feel to it, I think we can all agree that Cash was one of the most badass individuals to ever walk the Earth. 

The same can be said for Upton, whose 6'2", 205 pound build and decent all-around play make him almost intimidating, much like the man who sings the song.

Atlanta Braves: Brian McCann, Dukes of Hazzard Theme

If there's one thing I love in baseball, it's guys who get to play for the team they grew up rooting for. If they become stars with said team, even better.

That being said, there's only one song I can think of that's appropriate for Braves catcher Brian McCann, who grew up in Duluth, Ga. That's right, folks. I'm talking about Waylon Jennings' "Good Ol' Boys," known to most of us as the theme song from the hit TV show The Dukes of Hazzard. Seeing as how the show is supposed to be set in a town just a stone's throw from Atlanta, you can see why it fits McCann.

Baltimore Orioles: Nick Markakis, No Church in the Wild

If there's one thing I've always noticed about Nick Markakis, it's that he is always stone-faced whenever he comes to the plate. The man looks absolutely fearless. A 99 mile-per-hour fastball could be coming right down Broadway for him, and his heart wouldn't skip a beat.

Thus, Markakis deserves a song by two of the most fearless artists of all time. I'm talking about two who have regularly pushed the envelope well on their way to become the best of their genre. That's right, I'm talking about Jay-Z and Kanye West.

Fortunately for us, they just released a collaborative album called Watch the Throne, and the opening track says it all. "No Church in the Wild" features the vocal talents of Frank Ocean, and it just has a badass feel to it. I hear this song, and I automatically think of a posse getting together and unleashing hell on some sad-sack who jumped bail. 

You know, just how Markakis unleashes hell on fastballs that get thrown too close to the middle of the plate.

Boston Red Sox: David Ortiz, Bad to the Bone

In movies or TV, whenever this song is played, it usually means that a bad guy or some badass individual is about to make an entrance. Red Sox DH David Ortiz is no exception, as he has proven himself to be one of the game's most clutch hitters ever since coming to Beantown.

More importantly, just listen to that opening guitar riff. It automatically makes you go "UH-OH...WHAT WAS THAT?" 

Enter Ortiz, known to his fans as "Big Papi," who will then proceed to launch one of his legendary moonshot home runs as this song blasts.

Chicago Cubs: Alfonso Soriano, Dream on

This may seem like an odd choice for both player and song, but hear me out. First off, now that Aramis Ramirez is no longer a Cub and Carlos Pena could soon follow, Alfonso Soriano is the last man standing as the Cubs' best hitter. Yet, regarding the song, think of the circumstances in which it has been used before.

Let's not forget that this was the same song used during the closing credits of the film Miracle, which told the amazing story of the 1980 U.S. men's hockey team that miraculously beat the highly experienced Soviet Union team en route to winning a gold medal.

A similar story can be told about Soriano and the Cubs, though their miracle has not happened yet. Still, despite having gone over a century without winning a World Series, everyone on the team (including Soriano) manages to stay focused and never let the dream of winning die. They dream on and will continue to do so until they have some World Series rings on their fingers.

Chicago White Sox: Paul Konerko, Sweet Home Chicago

Most may know them for their famous hit "Slow Ride," but Foghat's cover of this classic blues tune works best for Chicago White Sox captain Paul Konerko.  Not only is the man a great power hitter, but his stoic manner at the plate would make him walking up to this song all the better.

Cincinnati Reds: Joey Votto, Mr. Roboto

I hereby christen Joey Votto with a new nickname, "Mr. Ro-Votto." The man is so unbelievably good and his swing so precise that you can't help but wonder: Is he man or machine?

Thankfully, back in the '80s, Dennis DeYoung and Styx wrote a song posing that very same question.

Cleveland Indians: Asdrubal Cabrera, Fighters

Last year, though they ultimately fell out of the playoffs after a fast start, the Cleveland Indians showed tremendous fight and heart over the course of the season. Much of the team's thanks to its success came from the breakout season of shortstop Asdrubal Cabrera, who led the way with a .273 average to go with 25 home runs and 92 RBI. This team never gave up until the very end, fighting every step of the way.

Thus, since Christina Aguilera's song "Fighter" isn't exactly a song one would associate with a baseball player, Lupe Fiasco's "Fighters" wins this round.

Colorado Rockies: Troy Tulowitzki, Can I Get a

Jay-Z just happens to be the favorite artist of Rockies shortstop Troy Tulowitzki, so this song seems like it would be a good fit for him and his solid offensive bat, not to mention his defense. On top of that, every time he gets a big hit, Tulowitzki seems to be thinking a certain lyric from this song. Unfortunately, for the sake of professionalism, I will not be repeating it.

Just watch the video to the left and don't be afraid to sing along if you'd like.

WARNING! SONG MAY CONTAIN LYRICS THAT ARE NSFW

Detroit Tigers: Miguel Cabrera, Detroit Rock City

Miguel Cabrera plays first base for the Detroit Tigers and literally rocked everyone's socks off.  How hard did he rock? Well, to the point of a .344 batting average, 30 home runs and 105 RBI.

Seeing as how he plays in Detroit, one of the birthplaces of rock-and-roll, along with the fact that he regularly rocks the baseball to all areas of the park, this song just plain fits. It's so awesome to the point where I kind of want to go onto a baseball field and play long-toss while it blasts in the background.

Houston Astros: Carlos Lee, a Horse with No Name

For most of his career, Astros outfielder/first baseman has been known as "El Caballo." In Spanish, that means "The Horse." Nothing more, nothing less.

Thus, seeing as how Lee isn't known for much else besides his skills on the diamond and this nickname, it's as though he's the horse with no real name. That being said, this song by folk-rock band America is the perfect fit for him not only because of his nickname, but because of how he plays for a team from Texas and isn't that far from the desert, which is mentioned in the song.

Kansas City Royals: Alex Gordon, Kansas City

Kansas City is a city famous for its contributions to the development of the jazz and blues genres of music, and it's clear that the Royals represent that to a degree with their uniforms.  That being said, it seems pretty obvious that the walk-up song that needs to be used here is The Beatles' cover of the classic blues rock tune "Kansas City." The only question that remains is, which of the talented hitters the Royals had last season gets to use it as their walk-up music?

After trolling through the annals, I determined that lefty-hitting Alex Gordon was the man who should receive the honor to have this song played for him. He hit a career high .303 last year with 23 home runs and 87 RBI and is deserving of a reward of some sort. Looks like having this awesome song as his walk-up music will be the first one he receives.

Los Angeles Angels: Albert Pujols, California Love

In a move that barely anybody saw coming, first baseman Albert Pujols spurned an offer from the St. Louis Cardinals, with whom he had spent all of his career and become a legend, and instead signed a lucrative contract with the Angels. The deal is worth $254 million over 10 years, with Pujols expected to add some much-needed pop into the Angels' lineup.

Given his excitement to play for the team and bring his family out to the West Coast, only one song seems appropriate. I'm talking a little West Coast rap featuring 2pac and Dr. Dre, two of the finest men to ever pick up a microphone.

Just listen to the first few bars of this song and tell me you can't picture Pujols walking up to bat as it plays. It just works.

Los Angeles Dodgers: Matt Kemp, Big Pimpin'

There are so many routes I could go in choosing a song for Matt Kemp. I could find something baseball-related or some rock song that pumps up the crowd.

Instead, let's go back in time and look at the 11 month-long period in which Kemp dated one of the most beautiful women on the planet, Rihanna. Seeing as how Kemp looks like this and Rihanna looks like this, and we'll throw in Kemp's 6'3", 225 pound frame just for fun, I think it's pretty clear as to how this little ditty by Jay-Z fits.

Miami Marlins: Jose Reyes, Miami

I don't care if you absolutely hate him with a passion or are indifferent. Will Smith is a phenomenal performer who has written some songs so ridiculously catchy that it's almost disgusting. Seeing as how the Marlins have been a popular team this offseason, complete with a name change, it's only fitting that his love song to Miami be the theme for new shortstop (I think?) Jose Reyes.

Let's be honest, folks. I'll bet that Reyes is definitely cruising the boulevard in his luxury car and has some beautiful women coyly looking at him and welcoming him to Miami with just one look in their eyes. Also, let's not forget how excited Marlins management is to have him on the team.

Thus, there's just one thing to say to the reigning NL batting champ: Welcome to Miami!

Milwaukee Brewers: Ryan Braun, Sabotage

Ryan Braun is easily one of the most talented hitters in the game. He can beat you with a home run, a single, an extra-base hit and even a stolen base. Even if he just draws a walk, he is dangerous. It's as though he's a professional saboteur on top of being an excellent baseball player.

Thankfully, saboteurs have their own theme song, and it is AWESOME. Thus, with Braun's cool and collected approach at the plate, using this as his walk-up music would just be amazing.

Minnesota Twins: Joe Mauer, Back in Black

Even though the past couple of seasons wouldn't exactly suggest it, Joe Mauer is the best hitter on the Twins. 2012 will be something of a comeback year for him, as in 2011, he hit a career-low .287 with just three home runs and 30 RBI in 82 games.

Simply put, I have a feeling that Mauer is going to be back with a vengeance in 2012 with a take-no-prisoners attitude. With him fully healthy, he'll be set to help bring the Twins back to the playoffs, and since his status as a hometown hero makes him one of the team's most marketable players, he will help the organization make money, and thus, end up in the black with some profits.

Thus, "Back in Black."

New York Mets: David Wright, Rock 'N' Roll

Mets third baseman David Wright's greatest strength is his ability to hit for great power to the opposite field. Unfortunately, playing in Citi Field has made that difficult the past couple of seasons. Thus, like Robert Plant so aptly sings in this song, "It's been a long time since I rock-and-rolled," I can't help but think that Wright could be thinking the very same thing.

Now that the fences have been moved in at the ballpark, perhaps Wright will get a chance to rock and roll once again. Until then, this song seems appropriate for him given his situation, as well as Zeppelin being great, of course.

New York Yankees: Robinson Cano, the Final Countdown

Look up "clutch" in the dictionary, and you'll find a picture of Robinson Cano. Late in the game, if the Yankees are trailing and get a rally going, opposing pitchers had better hope that they avoid this man. He is notorious for coming up with amazingly clutch hits in crunch time.

That being said, every time Cano comes up to bat, this song should blast just to reinforce the idea that pitching to him late in the game just speeds up the countdown until defeat.

Oakland Athletics: Brandon Allen, Californication

I'm not ashamed to admit that I'm a critic of Oakland's "moneyball" style of management. It seems to encourage sacrificing hitting well for average in exchange for drawing walks or getting hit by a pitch, not to mention being in a constant state of rebuild because of refusal to pay big money for key players on the team.

That being said, there just seems to be a general feeling of futility and uncertainty around the locker room. When it comes to top hitter Brandon Allen (yes, that's how thin the team's lineup is), I've chosen "Californication" by one of my favorite bands, the Red Hot Chili Peppers.

The song itself is great and fits since the team plays in California, but also has a somber tone to it. Much like the uncertainty that I'm sure exists among players in the Oakland locker room. I mean, come on. How would you feel if you played for a team whose GM traded away talent at the drop of a hat?

Philadelphia Phillies: Ryan Howard, Touch the Sky

I could go on and on about how this song fits Ryan Howard just because he's so damn big at 6'4" and 240 pounds and could, quite possibly, touch the sky. Yet, that's not my reason for picking this one.

To be honest, I just think it suits him. Just imagine him walking up to the plate, completely stone-faced while this song blasted and the Phillies fans went wild cheering for him.

It just plain works.

Pittsburgh Pirates: Andrew McCutchen, Let's Get It Started

As the Pirates' No. 3 hitter, Andrew McCutchen has a knack for bringing the first two batters home should one or both of them make it on base. Seeing as how the Pirates are usually hit or miss on offense, the team should be in "let's get the party started" mode when it comes to scoring runs, aka look to score as many as possible when runners are in scoring position.

This song blasting when McCutchen comes to bat would not only fire up the team, but it would get the Pirates thin fanbase into it as well. Nothing motivates a team better than fan support, and with that, the Pirates could potentially go far. Believe it or not, the Black Eyed Peas and this song of theirs could just hold the key.

San Diego Padres: Cameron Maybin, Centerfield

Believe it or not, looking at the San Diego Padres current roster, Cameron Maybin is the best hitter, as I will not use Yonder Alonso since he has yet to play one game for the team. Thus, we go for the young outfielder who finally got a chance to play regularly last season.

Ever since breaking into the majors in 2007, Maybin has struggled to find playing time. He got a chance with the Marlins in 2010, but not until Cody Ross was traded to the San Francisco Giants. I honestly kind of felt bad for the guy, seeing as how he was such a highly-touted prospect and was relegated to sitting on the bench.

Yet, once he was traded to San Diego before last season, Maybin got his chance to shine and showed up "ready to play." He then showed up to play some great defense in centerfield.  Thus, this ever-popular baseball ballad by Credence Clearwater Revival's John Fogerty is perfect for him.

San Francisco Giants: Pablo Sandoval, Kung Fu Fighting

Amongst Giants fans, third baseman Pablo Sandoval's husky build at 5'11", 240 pounds has earned him the nickname "Kung Fu Panda."

Thus, I think we all know the only song that's suitable for the popular switch-hitting All-Star.

Seattle Mariners: Ichiro, Disco Inferno

Even though his 2011 campaign was off compared to what we're used to seeing from him, Ichiro Suzuki is still the best hitter on the Seattle Mariners. His walk-up music has varied from year to year, from "Yeah!" by Usher to 50 Cent's "In Da Club."

The man clearly loves hip-hop, so I've picked one of my favorites by 50 Cent for the 10-time All-Star. "Disco Inferno" just has one of those catchy beats that you can't help but love, rocking your head back and forth in time with the rhythm from the very start. All in all, it just seems like it'd be a great walk-up song, and given how Ichiro seems to enjoy the genre, it just fits him.

WARNING! SONG MAY CONTAIN LYRICS CONSIDERED NSFW

St. Louis Cardinals: Lance Berkman, Jailhouse Rock

Ever since his years with the Houston Astros, the husky Lance Berkman has been affectionately known as "Fat Elvis." That being said, why not honor the King himself and have the new Cardinals first baseman walk up to bat while blasting one of his greatest hits, "Jailhouse Rock?"

Besides being one hell of a crowd pleaser, it's just a fun song and very fitting for Berkman's nickname. Throw in the fact that St. Louis was a hotbed for the rhythm and blues music that led to the sound produced by Presley, and this selection just plain makes sense.

Tampa Bay Rays: Evan Longoria, Come with Me

I don't care that most people hate this song, as it basically takes the guitar riff from Led Zeppelin's "Kashmir" and has Puff Daddy (as he was called back then) rapping over it. Still, I won't lie in saying that I think it's a pretty catchy tune.

That being said, looking at the great comeback the Tampa Bay Rays made last year on the back of top hitter Evan Longoria, this song and its take-no-prisoners tone are perfect for the All-Star third baseman. It just sounds like something that could inspire a team and fire everyone up.

Seeing as how the Rays are an up-and-coming team with tons of young talent, this song should not only be Longoria's walk-up music, but perhaps something to be blasted in the locker room before games just for inspirational purposes.

Texas Rangers: Josh Hamilton, Theme from the Natural

I remember when watching the 2010 ALCS, Josh Hamilton launched a home run in Game 1 of the series. As he rounded the bases, the theme from the movie The Natural was heard blasting from the stadium's speakers. Though I was frustrated that the Rangers now had a lead over my beloved New York Yankees, I couldn't help but feel moved.

To be perfectly blunt, Hamilton is probably the best pure hitter in the game today. He does a great job hitting for average and his power is off the charts. He basically is Roy Hobbs.

I understand that this song isn't a very traditional choice, but it's just that fitting considering Hamilton's path to greatness.

Toronto Blue Jays: Jose Bautista, Tom Sawyer

I have no shame in saying that Rush, a prog-rock band from Toronto, are probably one of my favorite groups both to listen to and see live. Their sound is so unique and interesting that you can't help but be sucked right in.

Seeing as how Jose Bautista plays for the band's hometown team, the Toronto Blue Jays, and has developed a home run swing that borders on the ridiculous seeing as how he had only hit 59 home runs in his six seasons prior to 2010, this song just seems like a good fit.  On top of that, it would get the fans even more into the moment once the man known as "Joey Bats" stepped up to the plate.

Washington Nationals: Michael Morse, Welcome to DC

I've got no shame in saying it, so here it comes: DC baseball is back, baby! With a ton of young talent already on the roster and it only being a matter of time before Bryce Harper bursts onto the major league scene, I think it's safe to say that this young squad will be contending in just a couple of years.

Yet, until Harper is called up, the big man in the lineup is first baseman/outfielder Michael Morse, who broke out in 2011 after finally getting the chance to play on a regular basis. In 146 games, he hit .303 with 31 home runs and 95 RBI.

Given how the team is on the verge of acquiring a whole new generation of fans with Stephen Strasburg back in the rotation full-time and Harper on the way up, I have found the perfect love song to DC for Morse to use as his walk-up music.

Give it a listen, and tell me you don't want to go check out our nation's capitol. It's that awesome!