Albert Pujols, Mike Tyson, Shaquille O'Neal & the Best Bald Athletes: With Hair!

Vin GetzCorrespondent IJune 17, 2011

Albert Pujols, Mike Tyson, Shaquille O'Neal & the Best Bald Athletes: With Hair!

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    LOS ANGELES, CA - APRIL 16:  Albert Pujols #5 of the St Louis Cardinals blows a bubble prior to the start of the game against the Los Angeles Dodgers at Dodger Stadium on April 16, 2011 in Los Angeles, California.  (Photo by Jeff Gross/Getty Images)
    Jeff Gross/Getty Images

    Albert PujolsMike TysonShaquille O'Neal. Michael Jordan.  And more.  Some of the greatest athletes of our time also happen to be bald.

    So much for Samson.

    But what would these sportsmen look like today if they were coiffed, had glorious flowing manes or, um, sported other fine hairstyles?

    There's only one way to find out...flip through this slideshow for a little Friday Fun.  Don't worry, I won't tell the boss.

Wayne Rooney Hair Transplant

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    The impetus for this slideshow came from Manchester United player Wayne Rooney's recent hair transplant.

    Rooney, has won five PFA Player of the Year honors, is a two-time England Player of the Year and won the FIFA Golden Ball award in 2008.

    He was a frontrunner for the Golden Bald award in 2010, when he announced via Twitter that he had gotten a hair transplant.

    This is the photo Rooney tweeted.

Andre Agassi

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    NEW YORK, NY - FEBRUARY 26:  Tennis legends Andre Agassi (L) and Steffi Graf attend the 2011 NYC Tennisbowl at Bowlmor Lanes in New York City on February 26, 2011 in New York City.  (Photo by Chris Trotman/Getty Images)
    Getty Images/Getty Images

    Andre Agassi won eight tennis majors and owns the career Grand Slam—Wimbledon, French Open, U.S. Open (two) and Australian Open (four).

    He was also known for his bad boy image and wild and ever-changing hairstyles.

    Today, even a tennis ball has more fuzz than Agassi's dome.

    Here he is with wife, and fellow majors winner (22—most all-time), Steffi Graf.

Andre Agassi...With Hair!

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    124853 06: Tennis Player Andre Agassi Kneels On A Tennis Court November 15, 1991 In USA. Agassi Made His Presence Known In 1987 In The Semifinals In Stratton Mountain And Went On To Win Several Titles Including His First Grand Slam Final At The French Ope
    John Russell/Getty Images

    And here is Steffi Graff mistake.  It's Andre Agassi with hair.

    Actually, it was a wig.

Brian Urlacher

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    CHICAGO, IL - CIRCA  2010: In this handout image provided by the NFL,  Brian Urlacher of the Chicago Bears poses for his 2010 NFL headshot circa 2010 in Chicago, Illinois. (Photo by NFL via Getty Images)
    Handout/Getty Images

    Brian Urlacher, feared cornerstone of the Chicago Bears' defense for the past 10 years, is as bald as his helmet.

    He's smiling in this photo.

Brian Urlacher...With Hair!

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    Welcome to the Hairpiece.


Kevin Garnett

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    LOS ANGELES, CA - JUNE 15:  Kevin Garnett #5 of the Boston Celtics reacts in the second quarter while taking on the Los Angeles Lakers in Game Six of the 2010 NBA Finals at Staples Center on June 15, 2010 in Los Angeles, California.  NOTE TO USER: User ex
    Ronald Martinez/Getty Images

    Kevin Garnett, 2008 NBA Champion with the Boston Celtics, was also the Defensive Player of the Year that year—and the 2004 MVP.

    He's got a no-nonsense personality to go with one mean-ass bald head.

Kevin Garnett...With Hair!

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    He would find this ludicrous.


Jeff Van Gundy...With Hair!

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    Hey, it's only fair.


Albert Pujols

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    Albert Pujols is the best player in baseball.  Well, at least for the past decade.  He was Rookie of the Year in 2001 and is a three-time MVP.

    That is one beautiful, gleaming cranium.

Albert Pujols...With Hair!

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    I'm glad he went with the bald look.


Stone Bald Steve Austin

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    Stone Bald is one of the greatest and most popular wrestlers in history—and is a 13-time champion.  He was Pro Wrestling Illustrated's Rookie of the Year in 1990 and is a three-time Wrestler of the Year.


Steve Austin...With Hair!

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    Geez, what happens to these guys when they retire?


    "Is that a banana in your pocket?"


Shaquille O'Neal

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    PHOENIX, AZ - JANUARY 28:  Shaquille O'Neal #36 of the Boston Celtics during the NBA game against the Phoenix Suns at US Airways Center on January 28, 2011 in Phoenix, Arizona.  The Suns defeated the Celtics 88-71.  NOTE TO USER: User expressly acknowledg
    Christian Petersen/Getty Images

    Shaquille O'Neal will go down as one of the greatest players to ever hit the hardwood.  He was an MVP, a 15-time All Star and a four-time champ.  Shaq's got the fifth-most points in NBA history.

    Alas, O'Neal retired at the end of the 2010-11 season.  We'll miss The Big Baldness.

Shaquille O'Neal...With Hair!

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    "Happy Biiiiiiiiirthday Mister Presidennnt."


Mark Messier

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    Mark Messier at the 2007 NHL All-Star game Jan. 24 in Dallas. (Photo by A. Messerschmidt/Getty Images)
    A. Messerschmidt/Getty Images

    Mark Messier is one of the best-known promise keepers in sports' history.  He delivered the 1994 Stanley Cup to New York Rangers' fans after a 54-year drought.  He has five other Cups (with the Edmonton Oilers) and two Hart Memorials to boot.

Mark Messier...With Hair!

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    "She Loves You, Eh, Eh, Eh!"


Matt Hasselbeck

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    SEATTLE - 2005:  Matt Hasselbeck of the Seattle Seahawks poses for his 2005 NFL headshot at photo day in Seattle, Washington.  (Photo by Getty Images)
    NFL Photos/Getty Images /Getty Images

    Ever since Trent Dilfer joined ESPN, Matt Hasselbeck has worn the crown of best bald QB in the NFL.  He took the improbable Seattle Seahawks to the Super Bowl in 2005 and a 7-9 team past the reigning champion New Orleans Saints in the 2010 Wild Card.

    With the 2011 football season up in the air, Matt is hoping the Anchorman sequel will still come through and he can pick up bare change as...

Matt Hasselbeck...With Hair!

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    Ron Burgundy's stunt double.

    Oh wait...wrong picture, sorry.


Matt Hasselbeck...With Hair!

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    Ron Burgundy's stunt double (ba-dum-bum).


Matt Hasselbeck...With a Ridiculous Mustache!

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    "Say Winifred! What say we take the penny-farthings out for a spin to the five and dime?  I need to pick up some mustache grease."


Michael Jordan

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    SPRINGFIELD, MA - SEPTEMBER 11:  Michael Jordan speaks during a news conference at the Naismith Memorial Basketball Hall of Fame on September 11, 2009 in Springfield, Massachusetts. (Photo by Jim Rogash/Getty Images)
    Jim Rogash/Getty Images

    Michael Jordan: the GOAT.

    And the MRBDITW: Most Recognized Bald Dude in the World.

Michael Jordan...With Hair!

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    Now he wants to be the GOAT of hair.  Give someone else a chance, Michael!

Cal Ripken Jr.

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    ST PETERSBURG, FL - OCTOBER 18:  Television personality Cal Ripken Jr. walks on the field before game six of the American League Championship Series between the Boston Red Sox and the Tampa Bay Rays during the 2008 MLB playoffs on October 18, 2008 at Trop
    Elsa/Getty Images

    Cal Ripken Jr. is best known for holding the major league baseball consecutive-games streak: 2,632 straight games.  He also was the Rookie of the Year, a 19-time All-Star, two-time MVP and member of the 1983 World Champion Baltimore Orioles.

    Cal Ripken Jr. is the Iron Man. Come to think of it, he also kind of looks a little bit like Ironman, at least follicley.

    Ripken is one of the most beloved athletes of the 20th century.  He is very active in charitable work and helped found Athletes for Hope, whose vision is to "to empower the sports community, especially athletes, to make a difference, and to inspire others to pass their passion for philanthropy from generation to generation."

    Little do they know about Cal's alter-ego.

Cal Ripken Jr...With Hair!

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    Cal Spector—Killer!


Zinedine Zidane

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    STUTTGART, GERMANY - JUNE 13:  Zinedine Zidane of France looks on during the FIFA World Cup Germany 2006 Group G match between France and Switzerland at the Gottlieb-Daimler Stadium on June 13, 2006 in Stuttgart, Germany.    (Photo by Mike Hewitt/Getty Im
    Mike Hewitt/Getty Images

    According to everyone from Pele to Michael Platini to David Beckham, Zinedine Zidane is one of the most skilled players to ever take the pitch. He led the French National Team to the World Cup title in 1998 and is a three-time FIFA World Footballer of the Year.

    In the 2006 World Cup Final, Zidane launched one of the most remembered "headers" in Cup history.

Zinedine Zidane...With Hair!

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    And he's been working on his technique.

Charles Barkley

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    LOS ANGELES, CA - FEBRUARY 20:  Former NBA player Charles Barkley arrives to the T-Mobile Magenta Carpet at the 2011 NBA All-Star Game on February 20, 2011 in Los Angeles, California.  (Photo by Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images)
    Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images

    Charles Barkley was the 1993 NBA MVP, an 11-time All Star (in a row) and 11-time All-NBA (in a row).

    He's the best baldy to never win an NBA championship.

Charles Barkley...With Hair!

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    And there go the remaining seconds of Sanjaya's 15 minutes.

Kevin Youkilis

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    OAKLAND, CA - APRIL 19:  Kevin Youkilis #20 of the Boston Red Sox stands in the dugout before their game against the Oakland Athletics at Oakland-Alameda County Coliseum on April 19, 2011 in Oakland, California.  (Photo by Ezra Shaw/Getty Images)
    Ezra Shaw/Getty Images

    Kevin Yooouuukilis is a big-time Boston favorite.

    He's batted .300 the last three years, and did you know he was third in MVP voting in 2008?

    Youk is proud of his follicleless-ness, and once hosted the "first-ever Bald Guyz 8 Ball Challenge at the Boston Billiards Clubs."

Kevin Youkilis...With Hair!

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    He doesn't care what anyone thinks.

    Not that there's anything wrong with a bearded man in a skimpy denim tank-top.


Marvelous Marvin Hagler

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    Marvin Hagler was the 1983 and 1985 Ring Magazine Fighter of the Year and a World Middleweight Champion.

    Hagler fought in a number of highly-billed and historical fights back in the '80's, including an incredible 15-round comeback decision over Roberto Duran and a three-round knockout of Thomas Hearns.

Marvin Hagler...With Marvelous Hair!

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    "Mike Tyson's tickly spot is here."


Terry Bradshaw

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    Terry Bradshaw on the sidelines  before the NFC Championship  game as the Chicago Bears host the New Orleans Saints Jan. 21, 2007 at Soldier Field, Chicago.  (Photo by Al Messerschmidt/Getty Images)
    A. Messerschmidt/Getty Images

    Four-time Super Bowl champion Terry Bradshaw was the Super Bowl MVP two of those times—and was MVP once during the regular season.

    Bradshaw can't remember the last time one of his hairs fell into his grits.

Terry Bradshaw...With Hair!

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    "And I was like baby, baby, baby, y'all."

    —Terry Bieber

    (I had to look up the lyrics, I swear.)

Emmitt Smith

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    DALLAS, TX - JUNE 07:  Former Dallas Cowboys running back and pro football Hall of Famer Emmitt Smith attends Game Four of the 2011 NBA Finals between the Dallas Mavericks and the Miami Heat at American Airlines Center on June 7, 2011 in Dallas, Texas. NO
    Ronald Martinez/Getty Images

    A three-time Super Bowl champion, Emmitt Smith is the NFL's all-time leading rusher and was the 1993 MVP.

    It's all about aerodynamics.

Emmit Smith...With Hair!

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    Run the ball. Pass the Dutchie.


Kareem Abdul-Jabbar

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    Tim DeFrisco/Getty Images

    Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, owner of six rings, six MVP titles and 19 All-Star selections, is also the NBA's all-time leader in minutes, field goals and points.

    Give him a statue, for God's sake!

    There's one fact you may not have known about Kareem.  He was once part of an early '80s rap duo...

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar...With Hair!

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    Kareem 'n Play.

Ray Nitschke

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    Ray Nitschke had as many hairs on his head as vowels in his last name.

    He was a member of the Super Bowl I and II Champion Green Bay Packers.


Ray Nitschke...With Hair!

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    Nitschke failed his Mad Max audition: too lovey-dovey.


Barry Bonds

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    SAN FRANCISCO - OCTOBER 08:  Sports stars Barry Bonds and Michael Jordan clown around on the practice ground during the Day One Foursome Matches of The Presidents Cup at Harding Park Golf Course on October 8, 2009 in San Francisco, California.  (Photo by
    Scott Halleran/Getty Images

    Barry Bonds has the most home runs in baseball history.*

    And for those of you who believe in the sanctity of statistics...

Barry Bonds...With Hair!

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    Sweet Revenge!


Mark Messier...With Hair Again!

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    Jaromír Jágr and Mark Messier gave birth to...this!

Kelly Slater

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    ABU DHABI, UNITED ARAB EMIRATES - FEBRUARY 07:  Surfer Kelly Slater of the United States poses with his award for “Laureus World Action Sportsperson of the Year“ in the winners studio at the 2011 Laureus World Sports Awards at the Emirates Palace on Febru
    Gareth Cattermole/Getty Images

    Ladies, now how about this bald fella, huh?

    Pro surfer Kelly Slater is the current ASP world champion.  It is the 10th time he has earned the title.

    He's also one of the most eligible athletes around.

    What's his secret?

Kelly Slater...With Hair!

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Jason Kidd

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    OKLAHOMA CITY, OK - MAY 23:  Jason Kidd #2 of the Dallas Mavericks sits on the bench before taking on the Oklahoma City Thunder in Game Four of the Western Conference Finals during the 2011 NBA Playoffs at Oklahoma City Arena on May 23, 2011 in Oklahoma C
    Christian Petersen/Getty Images

    Dallas Mavericks World Champion Jason Kidd at last climbed the summit in his 17th year in the NBA, after falling short of the peak twice before with the New Jersey Nets.

    He was the 1995 Rookie of the Year and is the current active leader in assists (second all-time) and steals (third).  Those are some serious numbers.

    Kidd is also known for his level-headed demeanor.

Jason Kidd...With Hair!

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    The stoic Mr. Kidd. "Nanoo-Nanoo."  Oops, wrong alien.

    "Play long and prosper."  That's better.

Roberto Carlos

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    MILAN, ITALY - NOVEMBER 27:  Roberto Carlos of Fenerbahce during the UEFA Champions League Group G match between Inter Milan and Fenerbahce at the San Siro stadium on November 27, 2007 in Milan,Italy.  (Photo by Michael Steele/Getty Images)
    Michael Steele/Getty Images

    Footballer Roberto Carlos is currently playing for Russian team Anzhi Makhachkala.

    He was a member of the 2002 World Cup Champion Brazilian National Team and was the recipient of the 2008 Golden Foot.

    All that hair gets in the way in football.

Roberto Carlos...With Hair!

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    "You ain't nothin' but a cao de caca."

Mike Tyson

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    NEW YORK - APRIL 14:  Retired boxer Mike Tyson is photographed at his hotel on April 14, 2010 in New York, New York.  (Photo by Chris McGrath/Getty Images)
    Chris McGrath/Getty Images

    Mike Tyson was once the most absolute fearsome mofo to step into a ring.  I mean, he would flatten these guys in seconds.  He'd knock the teeth out of their mouths and the damn hair off their head.

    Between 1986 and 1990, Iron Mike was the WBC, WBA and IBP World Heavyweight Champion.

Mike Tyson...With Hair!

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    Thankfully, he doesn't know where I live.

    Hope you enjoyed the slideshow!

    Let's just hope my editor-in-chief has a sense of humor.  If it's any consolation, I might appear on a slideshow like this in the near future (and not for the athlete part).

    Follow me on Twitter @VinGetz.



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