Trash Talking: A Look at Some of Hockey's Greatest Chirps

Steve McSween@dansallowsSenior Analyst IApril 23, 2010

LOS ANGELES, CA - FEBRUARY 02:  Sean Avery #16 of the New York Rangers argues with the referee for a call during a 2-1 loss to the Los Angeles Kings at the Staples Center on February 2, 2010 in Los Angeles, California.  (Photo by Harry How/Getty Images)
Harry How/Getty Images

Chirping is as much a part of the game of hockey as the Zamboni, power plays, and Donald S. Cherry.

It starts in minor hockey, and goes all the way up to the pros.

Though it may be looked down upon, it can have an ill effect on one's opponent, and take their head right out of the game.

Just look at the way New York Rangers winger Sean Avery got under the skin of Devils goaltender Marty Brodeur in the 2008 Stanley Cup Playoffs.

The future Hall-of-Fame tender said afterwards, "It was not an easy series, that's for sure. They did a great job of getting to me, getting in front of me and making my life tough out there."

And, he refused to shake the pesky Avery's hand after his New Jersey squad was eliminated in the first round by the Blueshirts.

There is nothing wrong with a little playful banter, especially if the end result is your team winning.

It doesn't always have to be harsh words either. A simple knock on a guy's inability to score can put a player over the edge.

Last season in the Western Hockey League, Los Angeles Kings prospect Thomas Hickey (while playing with the Seattle Thunderbirds), took a jab at the Tri-City Americans Eric Mestery.

With the teams locked up at 2-2 in the 3rd period, Mestery got a back door feed and shot it chest on the Thunderbirds netminder. As Hickey skated by the Tri-City bench he said, “Hey Mestery, it's the third period. Goalies are warm, shoot to score!”

Even Mestery's own teammates got a chuckle outta that one.

With that being said, here are a few of my favorite hockey chirps. You may want to put the women and children to bed for some of these folks, or if you are one of those guys that likes to write poems and collect butterflies then quit reading now.

So without further ado, here is my list of Top 20 Hockey Chirps, in no particular order.

20. "Hey goalie, I've seen coupons that save more than you."

19. "It must be hard to eat, when you got no hands."

18. (When a player rarely makes it in the lineup) "You've been scratched more times than a lottery ticket."

17. "That's a nice helmet...does it come in men's too?"

16. (When a player hits the post on a shot) "Nice one, just like your mom, smoke pole like a champ."

15. "You're just like a tampon. Only good for one period."

14. (When a player with a visor is talking trash) "What's that? Roll down your window, I can't hear you."

13. "I've seen better hands on a digital clock."

12. (To a player that is dangling the D all night) "You must have been dodgin' coat hangers the first nine months of yer life."

11. "You're easier to undress than a drunk chick."

10. "I've seen bigger hits in Little League."

9. "Your girl is like a pack of timbits, for $2 I can share her with the rest of the team."

8. "Hey tender, switch to Geico so you can save more."

7. At the face off, do a double take of the guy your squaring off against and say..."Hey man, does your coach know you're out here?"

6. (To a ref making too many bad calls) "Hey stripes, the whistle ain't a dick, get it out of your mouth."

5. "My left nut dangles better than you."

4. "Hey buddy can I borrow your hands, I need a stone for my skates."

3. "Ray Charles sees more ice than you."

2. "Hey tender, your legs are so wide open you make Jenna Jameson look like a saint."

1. "Funny, I heard you were the worst player on your last team too."



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