Rampage Jackson: How Did a Man This Stupid Ever Become a Good Fighter?

So I got home last night, flipped on my TV and DVR and started playing back yesterday’s The Ultimate Fighter episode, and I must say I'm feeling inspired from it!

This run of The Ultimate Fighter has taught me a number of things:

1.) If there was ever any doubt after his last run on TUF, that doubt has been destroyed: Quinton “Rampage” Jackson is an unbelievable moron!

2.) There is such a thing as being a complete and total failure as an MMA coach.  If you go a step worse than that, you’re name is probably Quinton Jackson. 

3.) A great pre-fight pep talk should include the word “titties” every third word, and should otherwise make absolutely no sense whatsoever. 

4.) Picking fights with the guys on the opposite team is cool if your name is Quinton “Rampage” Jackson. 

5.) We're doomed to see the following headline in the future: "Rampage Jackson beats soccer mom into unconsciousness!" 

6.) Don’t worry about consoling your fighters when they lose!  Rashad’s got your back, man! 

7.) When it comes to throwing out insults and talking trash, Rampage can dish it but he can’t take it. 

8.) The Ultimate Fighter is all about the fighters competing in the tournament...unless your name is Quinton Jackson.  Then it’s all about you, and the fighters are just a pointless side-note. 

9.) Kimbo Slice is the most fired up, eager warrior that will ever be a complete and total failure in UFC history. 

10.) I have a better nickname for Roy Nelson than “Big Country.”  Ladies and gentlemen, introducing “The Fat Kid that Could!” 

11.) Kimbo desperately wants to get another chance at failure.  This will be an important teaser on every single episode, to ensure that all the Kimbo faithful keep watching.  Then we’ll go all the way through the entire Ultimate Fighter season without ever seeing Kimbo fight again. 

12.) Kimbo Slice has the worst ground game I’ve seen since Art Jimmerson. 

13.) Size doesn’t matter.  Skill matters.  This is why the comparatively smaller Team Rashad is 6-0.  And Team Rampage is 0-6 because "they're all just crappy fighters" and "you can't teach them stuff." 

14.) If you sent Rampage to go buy you a good horse, he’d come back with and ostrich.

15.) I’m actually starting to really, really like Rashad Evans.  How weird is that?  Maybe it’s because anybody looks awesome next to Quinton Jackson.

16.) I’m completely at a loss—why does ANYONE actually like Rampage Jackson?

17.) Rampage Jackson is going to pick at least one fight with every fighter on Team Rashad—one that almost comes to blows, but not quite.  Then he’ll start on his own guys.  Then he's going after Dana.  After that, he's going to punch out the octagon girl.

18.) There’s stupid and then there’s Rampage Jackson stupid.

19.) This season, Rampage Jackson will probably do more damage to the gym than all of the fighters will do to the house combined.

20.) Quinton Jackson likes to throw tantrums and needs a timeout.

21.) I really, really, really feel like YouTube’ing Rampage versus Wanderlei Silva One and Two and Rampage versus Shogun.  I just know that watching Quinton Jackson get beat into unconsciousness repeatedly will make me feel happy inside.  I wonder why? 

More than anything else, I’m scratching my head and trying to figure one thing out: How is a guy this stupid one of the best fighters in the world?  Sure some fighters are idiots, but this is reality warping stupidity we’re talking about folks!