No, Seriously...MLB's Diamond and Cubic Zirconia of May

Diamond of May: Lance Berkman, Houston Astros

When I see Lance Berkman, I am reminded of players from a few decades ago—John Kruk and Kent Hrbek, just to name two. However, Berkman reminds us that he does not embody the nickname, "Fat Elvis," which was bestowed upon him.

His chubby face is deceiving; he is no Fat Elvis.

Berkman is quite athletic, actually. It is due to his outstanding athletic performance in May that he has earned the title of “Diamond of the Month.”

Berkman ended up atop May's MLB leaderboard in batting average (.471), runs (31), hits (49), on-base percentage (.553), and slugging percentage (.856).
His performance has been an essential part of the Astros’ winning percentage ascension from .448 to .517.

The switch-hitter is definitely making many pitchers nervous.

Cubic Zirconia of May: Colorado Rockies

This month’s Cubic Zirconia title is a result of a team effort. The reigning NL Champions went 9-19 in the month of May.

Fans may use the injury card—Troy Tulowitzki, Matt Holliday, and so on and so forth.

Yes, I know, honey, injury is a flirtatious bitch, but it’s part of the game.

Fact is, in the month of May, the Rockies were swept three times—Arizona, Philadelphia, and Chicago all contributed to the team’s loss column.

The only upside to being part of this team is that they are in the NL West; the team will play most of its games against some of the weakest teams in the Majors.

Sparkly Icing on May’s Cake: Chase Utley, Philadelphia Phillies

The rugged second baseman of the Phillies emits sexiness with his old-school swagger. Not only is the current NL Player of the Week quite a looker, he is a damn good ballplayer.

Currently, Utley is in the midst of a five-game home run hitting streak—having gone yard a total of 21 times this season.

While his offense is hot, we can’t overlook his splendid defense. Just today, he made two identical diving catches.

Nothing is hotter than a ballplayer with superb offensive and defensive skill—except for a ballplayer with superb offensive and defensive skills that loves animals.

Think I’m the only one who thinks this future-MVP is a Grade-A Hottie?

Well, Men’s Fitness thinks he deserves recognition for his delicious physique.