NCAA Bracket Predictions 2012: My Wife Makes the Picks

Making NCAA bracket predictions can be a chore for many, watching hours and hours of prognosticators in an effort to come up with that million-dollar bracket.

For my wife, me watching Selection Sunday got in the way of Cupcake Wars on Food Network.

Now, let me first say that I love my wife very much, but when it comes to college basketball, or just basketball in general, she doesn't know much. Well, except for the fact that they use a round ball and try to shoot it into a hoop.

But, bless my wife, she humors me every year and fills out a bracket, much to my delight.

However, she fills out her bracket in a different way than you or I do.

My wife is that person who picks based solely on mascots and team colors.

We'll sit in the kitchen for a few hours as I read her the mascot names in each matchup and she picks a winner and gives a reason.

She doesn't like to look at the seeds. She says that would cloud her judgement.

Last year, we did this, and she had a little success, scoring 107 out of 320 points, including picking Connecticut to make it to the championship game, where she thought they'd lose to Kansas. You can view the link and see her reasons last year.

This year, we decided to do the same thing and post a story.

I'm apologizing in advance because many of my wife's comments just had me shaking my head. But I still love her, and she still puts up with me.

So, without further delay, here are my wife's predictions for this year's NCAA Division I Men's Basketball Tournament.

For your printable bracket for the 2012 NCAA tournament, click here.

South Region Second Round

No. 1 Kentucky Wildcats over No. 16 Western Kentucky Hilltoppers or Mississippi Valley State Delta Devils

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I don’t ever like Devils to win or Wildcats are wild for a reason. When I see a Hilltopper, I picture this old guy with a big gray beard in a rocking chair. And I don’t see him beating anybody.

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No. 9 Connecticut Huskies over No. 8 Iowa State Cyclones

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I’m not thinking Cyclones like a tornado, but I’m thinking more like a little blue swirl with arms and legs. And that’s just not threatening at all.

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No. 12 VCU Rams over No. 5 Wichita State Shockers

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Shockers just don’t sound like they can do anything.

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No. 4 Indiana Hoosiers over No. 13 New Mexico State Aggies

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Since I don’t know what either are, I’ll go with Hoosiers because it sounds cooler.

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No. 11 Colorado Buffaloes over No. 6 UNLV Runnin’ Rebels

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Well, they both run. But in a race, I’m guessing the buffalo will win.

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No. 3 Baylor Bears over No. 14 South Dakota State Jack Rabbits

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Don’t bears eat rabbits?

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No. 7 Notre Dame Fighting Irish over No. 10 Xavier Musketeers

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So one has a sword and one has a hat and fists? I don’t know, that little Irish guy looks a little angry. I have a feeling he’d come out on top.

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No. 2 Duke Blue Devils over No. 15 Lehigh Mountain Hawks

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I keep picturing that pitchfork poking a piece of chicken

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West Region Second Round

No. 1 Michigan State Spartans over No. 16 LIU-Blackbirds

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I keep envisioning that scene from 300 where Leonidas kicks a guy down a hole.

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No. 8 Memphis Tigers over No. 9 Saint Louis Billikens

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I don’t even know what a billiken is. It sounds like a name from a kid’s song. So, I’ll go with the Tigers.

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No. 5 New Mexico Lobos over No. 12 Long Beach State 49ers

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I’m pretty sure a wolf could overpower a man panning for gold. That or a football player.

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No. 13 Davidson Wildcats over No. 4 Louisville Cardinals

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Cats eat birds.

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No. 6 Murray State Racers over No. 11 Colorado State Rams

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I keep picturing a car and a sheep. And, you know who wins in that contest.

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No. 3 Marquette Golden Eagles over No. 14 BYU Cougars or Iona Gaels

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No funny explanation—I just think Eagles win. On a side note, eagles made of gold won’t fly very well.

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No. 10 Virginia Cavaliers over No. 7 Florida Gators

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I only know of one Gators. In my book, Gators never win.

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No. 15 Norfolk State Spartans over No. 2 Missouri Tigers

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I feel like the same rule applies to the one above. Spartans have spears.

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East Region Second Round

No. 16 UNC-Asheville Bulldogs over No. 1 Syracuse Orangemen

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When I think of Orangemen, I think of a guy covered head to toe in orange. You know, like those guys in those full-body stretchy suits.

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No. 8 Kansas State Wildcats over No. 9 Southern Miss. Golden Eagles

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Gut instinct on this one. Feeling the Wildcats over the Eagles.

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No. 5 Vanderbilt Commodores over No. 12 Harvard Crimson

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Well, crimson is a color and Commodores are like high-ranking military guys with swords.

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No. 13 Montana Grizzlies over No. 4 Wisconsin Badgers

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Compared to a bear, a badger doesn’t seem that fierce.

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No. 11 Texas Longhorns over No. 6 Cincinnati Bearcats

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I don’t even know what a bearcat is.

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No. 3 Florida State Seminoles over No. 14 St. Bonaventure Bonnies

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I think of that old song I sang as a kid, “My bonny lies over the ocean…” where bonny refers to a lover. So, lover versus Indian with tomahawk, who do you think will win?

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No. 10 West Virginia Mountaineers over No. 7 Gonzaga Bulldogs

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These are backwoods guys with hunting rifles. They’ll take down anything that moves.

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No. 15 Loyola (MD) Greyhounds over No. 2 Ohio State Buckeyes

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A thing that falls off a tree versus a really fast dog. I’m gonna go with the dog.

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Midwest Region Second Round

No. 1 North Carolina Tar Heels over No. 16 Lamar Cardinals or Vermont Catamounts

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If he could take out his brother in blue, he could definitely take out either one of those animals.

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No. 8 Creighton Blue Jays over No. 9 Alabama Crimson Tide

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If the Crimson Tide is actually a tide, then it wouldn’t affect a bird because a bird just flew overhead.

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No. 5 Temple Owls over No. 12 California Golden Bear or South Florida Bulls

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Owls are smart, so I feel like they could figure out a way to win over either.

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No. 4 Michigan Wolverines over No. 13 Ohio Bobcats

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Wolverine is my favorite X-Men character.

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No. 6 San Diego St. Aztecs over No. 11 N.C. State Wolfpack

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The Aztecs used to cut people’s hearts out.

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No. 3 Georgetown Hoyas over No. 14 Belmont Bruins

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I’ve been all about bears so far, which makes me not want to pick them.

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No. 10 Purdue Boilermakers over No. 7 St. Mary’s Gaels

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One speaks Gaelic, the other speaks hammer.

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No. 15 Detroit Titans over No. 2 Kansas Jayhawks

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When the titans were loosed in Greek literature, it meant big trouble for everyone. And only a superhero could undo them. And I don’t think a Jayhawk is a superhero.

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South Region Round of 32

No. 9 Connecticut Huskies over No. 1 Kentucky Wildcats

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So, it’s basically a dog versus a cat. In a dog versus a cat fight, I feel like the dog would come out on top

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No. 4 Indiana Hoosiers over No. 12 VCU Rams

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Don’t really have a reason why, it’s just my gut instinct.

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No. 3 Baylor Bears over No. 11 Colorado Buffaloes

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Buffaloes have horns and bears have claws. Bears can manage to hibernate for half the year and still be awesome.

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No. 2 Duke Blue Devils over No. 7 Notre Dame Fighting Irish

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Aren’t they both going to the same place? The Irish guy is shorter and that often doesn’t turn out well in basketball

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West Region Round of 32

No. 1 Michigan State Spartans over No. 8 Memphis Tigers

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Didn’t you see my first-round projection. Spartans always win, although they technically didn’t win at the end of the movie.

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No. 5 New Mexico Lobos over No. 13 Davidson Wildcats

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Another wolf versus a cat, so I’m again going with the wolf.

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No. 3 Marquette Golden Eagles over No. 6 Murray State Racers

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So, I’m picturing a car and an eagle. Typically, eagles don’t wreck.

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No. 10 Virginia Cavaliers over No. 15 Norfolk State Spartans

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Since this is the first human challenge for the Spartans, they will fall.

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East Region Round of 32

No. 8 Kansas State Wildcats over No. 16 UNC-Asheville Bulldogs

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I feel like a wildcat is more aggressive than an orange. I could see a bulldog beating an orange, but not a wildcat.

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No. 13 Montana Grizzlies over No. 5 Vanderbilt Commodores

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There’s a commodore in Pirates of the Caribbean that was really somewhat lame. I don’t see that guy being able to take down a grizzly bear.

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No. 11 Texas Longhorns over No. 3 Florida State Seminoles

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I’m pretty torn on this one. I don’t know, Native Americans were pretty fierce, but I keep imagining those horns. Is this longhorn “tied up,” if you know what I mean? If so, then I’m picking the Longhorns.

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No. 10 West Virginia Mountaineers over No. 15 Loyola (MD) Greyhounds

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For some reason, this time the image I got for a greyhound was a bus. Earlier I said that Mountaineers were backwoods guys who could take down anything. I’m guessing that includes a bus.

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Midwest Region Round of 32

No. 1 North Carolina Tar Heels over No. 8 Creighton Blue Jays

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It’s the soldiers against another bird, so I have to go with the Tar Heels.

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No. 4 Michigan Wolverines over No. 5 Temple Owls

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I don’t think an Owl is smart enough to get him out of that.

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No. 3 Georgetown Hoyas over No. 6 San Diego Aztecs

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I don’t know. I've just got a good feeling for the Hoyas on this one.

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No. 10 Purdue Boilermakers over No. 15 Detroit Titans

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If you go along with Greek literature, Hercules comes from a regular family, and I’m guessing that Boilermakers come from regular families.

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South Region Sweet 16

No. 9 Connecticut Huskies over No. 4 Indiana Hoosiers

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The more I hear Hoosiers, the more I think about the word “ooze.” And, that doesn’t sound very good for basketball.

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No. 3 Baylor Bears over No. 2 Duke Blue Devils

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All devils eventually end up in trouble.

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West Region Sweet 16

No. 1 Michigan State Spartans over No. 5 New Mexico Lobos

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If you watch the beginning of 300, Leonidas wins against the wolf.

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No. 10 Virginia Cavaliers over No. 3 Marquette Golden Eagles

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I think the Cavaliers will bring the eagles down.

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East Region Sweet 16

No. 8 Kansas State Wildcats over No. 13 Montana Grizzlies

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Bears have to take a nap sometime.

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No. 11 Texas Longhorns over No. 10 West Virginia Mountaineers

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I feel like if I said a Longhorn could take down a Seminole, then it could probably take down a Mountaineer as well.

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Midwest Region Sweet 16

No. 4 Michigan Wolverines over No. 1 North Carolina Tar Heels

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The Tar Heels are from the South, right? The South didn’t win the war.

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No. 10 Purdue Boilermakers over No. 3 Georgetown Hoyas

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If I was making Herculean comments last time, then it still applies.

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Elite 8

SOUTH REGION FINAL

No. 9 Connecticut Huskies over No. 3 Baylor Bears

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A dog versus a bear. I keep imagining this husky more like a wolf than a dog because it’s really fierce. So, I think a wolf would overtake a bear.

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WEST REGION FINAL

No. 1 Michigan State Spartans over No. 10 Virginia Cavaliers

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I’m feeling good about the first Spartan team. I don’t know why, but I think they win here.

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EAST REGION FINAL

No. 11 Texas Longhorns over No. 8 Kansas State Wildcats

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We’ll ride the Longhorns all the way.

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MIDWEST REGION FINAL

No. 4 Michigan Wolverines over No. 10 Purdue Boilermakers

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I’m thinking of the X-Men movie over the Hercules movie. Wolverine would win.

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Final Four

Michigan Wolverines over Texas Longhorns

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After a while, the bull has to get tired.

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Michigan State Spartans over the Connecticut Huskies

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Leonidas and his 300 guards are preparing for the final battle.

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NCAA Championship

Michigan State Spartans over Michigan Wolverines

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I considered that historically Leonidas and his men fell at the hands of the Persians as arrows came raining from the sky to take the Spartans' last breaths away. However, I’m rewriting not only the movie, but history. Leonidas and the 300 overtake Xerxes and the Wolverines, 65-58.

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