11 Bold Predictions for the Royal Rumble

Hey yo!

This is my first go around this particularly heaving site of people in the opinionated know. The first of many, I hope!

What I'm saying is, don't be too harsh on this guy, he's actually pretty good, but just needs a little time to show the world, dig it?

With that said, the 25th, not the 25th anniversary of the Royal Rumble is on Sunday. Here are 11 bold predictions for what I think or, maybe willing, hope will happen on the first stop on the Road To WrestleMania.

I hope you all enjoy the read, let's hit it hard, hit it fast.

Prediction 11: There Will Be a Divas Match Added

We all know how much the senior McMahon dislikes the Divas as in ring competitors. Almost as much as he likes them as just things to look at, and possibly fondle now and again. But at an event that has very little filler in it so far, a much needed bathroom break will be needed.

The "BOLD" part of this prediction comes in the form of, I don't think the Divas champion will even be involved.

I haven't seen Beth Phoenix on TV for what seems like forever. She was mentioned a few weeks back on RAW before one of the worse segments ever, namely, Zack Ryder changing his tire. 

Other than successful Diva's title defenses at consecutive Pay-Per-Views she has not been seen. Apparently she was on Superstars on January 16th in a winning effort against Brie Bella. The thing with that is, no-one watches Superstars. I am from the UK, where Superstars is still on TV and not even I watch it. Especially not that Drew McIntyre isn't on it anymore.

The match that will happen?

Tamina vs Natalya (possibly with a no. 1 contenders stipulation added)

Why?

Because apparently this match has not happened enough on SmackDown in recent weeks.

Prediction 10: One More Match Needs to Be Added

At time of writing, there are 4 matches announced for the Pay-Per-View, including the Royal Rumble match itself. Now, the Rumble usually goes over an hour and this year, no doubt, will be no exception. So, in theory, we have 3 matched (4 if you count the Tamina vs Natalya match I just booked) to fill 2 hours.

Don't get me wrong, it's doable, but that would mean each match would have to go, what? 40 minutes? Who in their right mind would want to see John Cena vs Kane for 40 minutes? I sure as hell don't.

For this extra match, we'll have to go scouring the mid card talent. So long as it is the first match, I think it will be a great opener.

The match that will happen?

Jack Swagger vs Kofi Kingston (US Title on the line)

Why?

Jack Swagger won the title 2 weeks ago on RAW form Zack Ryder and then got obliterated by John Cena in the very next segment. Swagger needs and win as champion and a solid win at that. I think the man to give him that match and to put him over solidly is Kofi Kingston. Swagger, although already a former World Champion just needs a solid run with the US Title to be taken seriously again. This could be a great start.

Prediction 9: An FCW Talent Will Make His Debut

There a re several superstars in FCW currently that the ICW are salivating over seeing in a WWE ring sooner  than later. Seth Rollins (former ROH Champion Tyler Black) has been in FCW for over a year now, others such as Dean Ambrose (former everywhere but ROH champion Jon Moxley) and Antonio Cesaro (former everywhere tag team champion and one half of the Kings Of Wrestling, Claudio Castagnoli) and a one to watch for my own standpoint, one Corey Graves (independent stalwart Sterling James Keenan) have been there not as long, but anticipation for there inevitable debuts are still very high.

I think this is the Pay-Per-View to pull the trigger on someone.

It may not even be one of the men mentioned above. However, looking through the FCW superstar page as I often do, if only to fantasy book and look through the faces of men who will be brought up too early or too late, misused on WWE TV, sent back to FCW, released and then go back to ROH or being a bouncer, in a blaze of failure having to re-live that one fleeting moment they had on TV.

I made myself sad.

Looking at the mug shots on the FCW website though, it is possible to see who has potential. I sometimes just can't get over the awful, awful names some of them have been given.

Example:- Remember Tough Enough? Pretty good, wasn't it? Well, the winner or it was a fella called Andy Levine, right? Yes, yes it was. So why is under his visage the name 'Kevin Hackman'? There is a bigger point here, that I will go into in a separate article, so stay tuned.

Why will debut?

Bo Rotundo. Possibly with a re-emergance of Husky Harris as they are brothers and former FCW tag team champions.

How would I book the debut?

I would have the Rotundo's attack the current Tag Team Champions Primo and Epico in a backstage segment. Take their places in the Rumble match and start the feud for the titles proper the next night on RAW. Or is that just too simple?

Prediction 8: I Will Again Prove to Be the Biggest Nerd at the Rumble Gathering

Have you ever gone to a friend's house or had people over to your place to save on cash or whatever for a Pay-Per-View? Has there been that one guy who knows just a little bit too much for the rest of the group to bare? Yeah, that's me. Hey yo!

For instance, a few weeks ago, I was a friends house and we decided to watch In Your House 15: A Cold Day In Hell. The first match on the card was Flash Funk vs Hunter Hearst Helmsley (I wonder, what ever happened to that guy?) I know, the first match people would have saw on that card was Rockabilly vs "The Real Double J" Jesse James, but that was on the Free For All and not the Pay-Per-View per se. As my friend was only aware of Flash Funk in that character, I went on to explain that he was known as 2 Cold Scorpio in ECW and regular Scorpio later in WWF as part of the J.O.B Squad. I went on to mention he was in one of my favourite ECW matches, which was Television Title match vs Sabu (the one on the Rise & Fall of ECW DVD). After a little while he kind of said "right, you can shut up now" to which I said "how dare you get in the way of Charles Scaggs life story" Charles Scaggs being Scorpio's real name. My friend had had enough by that point, saying "mate, you know too much". I took it as a compliment, I'm not sure he meant it as such.

Don't worry, I haven't run out of predictions already. I just thought I would take a slide to explain where I'm coming from. Basically, a guy who just wants to write about things I love, to people who appreciate it.

Let's get back on track, here.

Prediction 7: Drew McIntyre Will Be Threatned but Ultimately Not Be Fired, Again

This current storyline with Drew McIntyre and Teddy Long is equal parts stupid and intriguing.

Stupid because (and this is the extremely short version of it) Teddy Long, as General Manager of SmackDown (playa) is presumably in charge of who is signed, re-signed or not signed on a brand basis. He signed Drew McIntyre to a very lucrative contract and then realised after everything had been signed and on TV that that was the best time to tell Drew he didn't think he was worth the fee he is paying. How is this any of Drew's fault? Teddy Long is the idiot who can't get his affairs straight before they're finalised. Drew just saw the money and signed away. I have all the sympathy for Drew in this storyline. Teddy Long may be the stupidest character on all of television right now.

This happened 5 weeks ago, where Teddy also said that if Drew loses enough times. he'd be fired. Drew has gone on to lose every week for the past 5, and while I kind of like the fact they're not going for the clichéd three strikes and you're out rule, Teddy either needs to put up or shut up. Alternatively, Drew needs to snap at being made to jump through hoops week in week out, purely because his "job is on the line".

In another bit of backstage business, Drew will be in Teddy's office and Teddy will say "listen here, playa, if you wanna keep your job on SmackDown, you're gonna have to win the Royal Rumble, dawg. Holla holla!" He may also dance if the mood takes him, which it undoubtedly will. I was about to say I deserve some extra credit if that's what he says word for word, but we all know that is exactly what he will say.

Drew will accept his fate, enter the Rumble and get eliminated in seconds.

If I wasn't so sure something big was on the horizon for Drew, possibly a Money In The Bank win, should they decide to bring it back for WrestleMania, I'd be so pissed off with this storyline.

Prediction 6: Zack Ryder Comes Back to Help Cena Embrace the Hate

Let me get one thing straight off the bat, I do not care about this match at all. The only thing worse than a serious and sombre John Cena is a joking, laughs everything off John Cena. Actually, there is, a sombre Jerry Lawler. Stay tuned for a Jerry Lawler based article in the future incidentally.

I digress.

I think over the last month even the WWE has gotten confused with this storyline. Originally it was Roddy Piper telling John that the fans were turning on him more by the day, and therefore Cena should turn back on the fans, right? Because what we have now is Cena become more aggressive towards heels, which logically should make him more of a baby face, going in the complete opposite direction, surely?

Also, Zack Ryder's involvement through the whole thing has been perplexing to say the least. I will say I was one of the many people that bought into Z! True Long Island Story from the very beginning, I even have a Broski headband.But his involvement with Cena goes back to the first few weeks of Z!TLIS when Cena wouldn't even appear on the show. Now all of a sudden they're best buds and Cena is fighting all of Ryder's battles for him? #areyouseriousbro?

The best part of this entire storyline, as a plot point, not the acting, was Eve this past week on RAW saying to John what happened to Zack was all his fault. It is! It is all his fault.

How would I book it?

Have the whole thing be a ruse, have Ryder and Kane in on it together. Have the "broken back" angle from RAW be a part of the master plan for Cena to embrace the hate. Have Zack come back as a serious character, possibly the mastermind behind the whole thing, like Keyser Soze, nobody expects the crippled idiot, and that's what Ryder has been, especially now he has a broken back.

Zack Ryder - MEGA HEEL (Woo woo woo, you know it!)

Prediction 5: Daniel Bryan Retains the World Championship

This match I think has a ton of potential. Here is where I would put "quite literally" because of the people involved, but they're still way off a ton.

Daniel Bryan will win due to some shenanigans, whether they will be of his own doing remains to be seen.

I can see many ways in which this could go down, but here are the 3 main ways my brain has managed to sift through.

Scenario 1 - Big Show choke slams Daniel Bryan through the canvas. Show and Mark Henry keep having a match only for the bell to sound from out of nowhere. Bryan has crawled from under the ring technically winning the match via "escaping" the cage. This has happened before, in the ill fates barbed wire cage match at the 2005 No Way Out which pitted JBL against Big Show. As It's almost a certainty this match won't be on last, it could act as a good time filler to fix the ring again before whatever matches follow it. 

Scenario 2 - Another thing Big Show has done. Show and Mark Henry throw Bryan against the cage wall, breaking open one of the panels. Bryan drops down, his feet touch the floor, still champion. Bryan runs around the ring with the belt as Big Show and  Mark Henry look on angrily at each other. They both go after Bryan, who easily out runs them to the back. There is potential for follow up later in the night with Bryan still running away, depending on the positioning on the card, and how much time needs killing. Again, it's been done before, but if Big Show and Mark Henry can collapse a ring, then doing something from a 1999 Pay-Per-View will be fine.

Scenario 3 - As far as I am aware, this is original. At some point during the match, the cage is risen just enough for Bryan to crawl under the bottom rope and the cage. The cage is lowered back into position afterwards. Again, Bryan runs around the ring with the belt and Show and Henry struggle to get out of the cage.

Who did it would be revealed a long way down the line or later in the night. It would be AJ, who has fallen for Daniel Bryan completely.

Prediction 4: CM Punk Retains with a Little Help...

I know, I know, this doesn't make any sense, which is exactly why it has to happen.

The Rock at Survivor Series '98 and Stone Cold at WrestleMania X-7. They're 1-1 in having the top baby face at the time siding with the heel authority figure. It worked with Rocky because he hadn't really carved out that much of a character, he was fresh out of the Nation Of Domination and been getting over somewhat as a face, which made the turn better, The Rock was always better as a cocky heel, to me. Stone Cold on the other hand had always been a baby face, really, as Stone Cold at least. The whole anti-hero thing was in full swing and Austin was the personification of that. Turning him actually heel though didn't work so well because he was still doing the same stuff but under the guidance of Vince McMahon. A bad guy still doing what he did as a good guy is still a good guy, which is why he was still cheered everywhere he went. That and there was no credible baby faces to go up against at that time, really. Which is ridiculous considering the Invasion was just about to kick off.

Back to my original point of this has to work if only because of how good a heel Punk is. I think he has been face for quite long enough and after he hit Johnny Ace with the GTS, it's the perfect time for a swerve as he is also the special guest referee. 

This could work as a nice double turn for Punk and Ziggler. Ziggler has completely outgrown Vicky Guerrero and needs to be his own man. Why not a face man?

Prediction 3: The Miz and R-Truth Will Place No. 1 and No. 2 in the Royal Rumble

As per this past weeks RAW, we already know The Miz will be the Number 1 entrant in the 2012 Royal Rumble match. In fine WWE form, I can see it giving the WWE Universe a big F-U (or is that attitude adjustment?) by having R-Truth in at number 2. Rendering the match on RAW completely pointless. 

This feud, if booked rigHAHAHA. Couldn't get though that with a straight face. In theory though, this rivalry could go all the way to WrestleMania, if they wanted it to.

How would I book it?

They would both start the Rumble, last a while, eliminate each other, brawl to the back. They don't touch each other until the Elimination Chamber match. One eliminates the other, then lays the other out leading to their elimination. Do not touch until WrestleMania where a stipulation could be added. Just have the Stipulation make sense to the feud. It seems like an obvious thing to say, but that's the thing with gimmick Pay-Per-Views. The stipulations are shoe horned in as opposed to letting them come up organically. Again, there is a bigger picture problem here which I will tackle at a later date.

Prediction 2: Surprise Entrants Abound

The best parts of the Royal Rumble matches recently have been the surprise entrants. Last year we saw the returns of "Big Daddy Cool" Diesel and Booker T. Both of which should have kept it at that and became road agents or something. Nash was involved in maybe as many as  three of the worse angles and story lines of the year and Booker T is the worst commentator I've ever heard, yes, worse than Michael Cole, I mean "shucky ducky quack quack"? tell me you didn't just say that?!

So the question becomes, who will be the surprise entrants this year?

With Booker apparently doing commentary, it looks like he may not be entered again, but King has entered from the commentary desk before, so who knows?

Skip Sheffield has been working house shows and dark matches recently so he looks about ready to come back. Whether people will remember who he is remains to be seen, especially as he is apparently working under a different name now. Ryback.

Goldust is probably the best shout at a surprise entrant. He has been rallying on Twitter for a match with his brother Cody at WrestleMania. So I see him coming in, and eliminating Cody, follow up on SmackDown, BOOM! feud under way.

The Road Dogg made a surprise return at the Slammy awards and has not been mentioned since. Imagine that as a moment, 3. 2. 1... OH YOU DIDN'T KNOW?! That's a mark out moment right there, brother.

Steve Blackman. I just want the Lethal Weapon back. Is that too much to ask?

One of the Horsemen. I'd really like to see Tully Blanchard in it actually. He was always my favourite Horseman. 

Of course, the possibility of the surprise entrant in years, Brock Lesnar. If they were going to bring him in, Sunday would be the time and place to do it. How great would that be, I for one would love to see him back.

Prediction 1: Randy Orton May Win, Chris Jericho Will Win

With the Royal Rumble coming live from St Louis, Missouri this Sunday, you'd be forgiven for thinking that Randy Orton has a better shout than anyone to win the 30 man battle royal. What people seem to forget is WWE is all about humiliating people in their home towns, or at the very least lose out of spite. JR got fired in Oklahoma, The Miz got fined a hefty sum, then later fired in Cleveland, Beth Phoenix lost the Divas title match against Kelly Kelly in Buffalo.

Think back to the 2007 Royal Rumble. That took place out of San Antonio, Texas. The final 2 in that Rumble? Shawn Michaels and The Undertaker. The one not from San Antonio ended up winning that match.

So, I think the same thing will happen here, it will come down to Chris Jericho and Randy Orton as the final 2. Jericho has promised it to be the end of the world as we know it, whatever that could possibly mean at this point, maybe it could be an end to the main event monopoly of Randy Orton? Who knows?

Also, fun side note, it was Randy who put out Jericho in kayfabe the last time he went away via a punt to the head, I wonder if any of the commentators will bring it up?

Conclusion: The Bit Where I Try a Couple of Sign-Offs to See Which If Any Work

This Royal Rumble has the potential to be the best one since last year, and you can take that prediction to the bank!

Thank you for reading, remember, this is my first attempt, be gentle.

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