WWE/TNA News: Hulk Hogan Claims Electrical Back Implant Excites His Groin Region

Yes, you read that correctly.

You can file this piece of (too much) information in the folder of news items that sound too ludicrous to be true, but actually are.

Now, that doesn't mean the content of what Hulk Hogan has expressed to be necessarily true, but at least his claim is.

And if there is anyone known for making outlandish claims (click here to read a collection of them) throughout his career, it's the six-time WWF/E champion Hulk Hogan.

In speaking to Canadian TV News, "The Hulkster" has shocked and awed us again, divulging a host of details about his battery-operated back implant. Reportedly, the device became necessary after eight back surgeries, as well as the resultant scar tissue. Yet, according to Hogan, the gadget does much more than alleviate physical pain.

Hogan is very passionate about the multifarious effects of his back implant:

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"It's an electric stim' you know? If the pain in my back is too bad and it goes to my head, there's an electrical current that I can turn on that will cancel out any pain waves, it pretty much makes you so you don't feel the pain. It's not a drug, it's just electricity. I've got like a garage door controller with all these buttons on how intense I want to make it, my nipples stand on end if I want to! And my wiener stands straight. It's much better than Viagra!"

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Suffice it to say "The Real American" superstar has way too much time on his hands. But, now that his in-ring days are largely over, at least his retirement will be a pleasurable one.

And while he won't be wagging his finger in the faces of his foes anytime soon, he'll be "Hulking Up" in a different way with just the push of a button.

For those who are disturbed by this news, don't fret—this only marks the evolution of Hulk Hogan in the year 2012. After being "Incredible," "Immortal," then "Hollywood," Hogan will carry on as the bionic legend.

There is no doubt that, powered by today and tomorrow's technology, "Hulkamania" will truly live forever.

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