Fantasy Football 2011: Why You Should Never Listen to Fantasy Football Experts

Looking back at my draft, I have no idea what I was thinking taking Rashard Mendenhall in the first round. I also believe that I was probably intoxicated when I took Tampa Bay Mike Williams in the fourth round. And for the nail in the coffin, I took Vernon Davis in the fifth.

This pathetic game plan is compliments of my massive research of the opinions of every single fantasy football guru, from Matthew Berry to Micheal Fabiano.

And I have come to this conclusion: Fantasy football experts have as much credibility as meteorologists.

Fantasy football is nothing more than a guessing game, just like predicting the weather. So I do not understand how someone can be called an "expert" if it clearly looks like they're just flipping a coin to decide what advice they're going to give people.

Would you like it if a doctor guessed on his final diagnosis on your health issues?

I will admit that it is entertaining to read some of the articles put out by "experts." Brad Evans from Yahoo! Sports does a Flames/Lames article where he predicts who will do well that week (flames) and who will suck (lames).

But if I was him, I would list myself under the "lames" because I suck at consistently giving good fantasy football advice.

I am well aware that predicting fantasy football is not an easy job. There are so many variables like injuries and in-game adjustments that effect how a player will perform. It is pretty much impossible to predict how good or bad any player will do. 

But now it's getting to the point where these "experts" are costing me, and millions of fantasy football fans, lots and lots of money.

You "experts" insist that we listen to you when you say not to draft Maurice Jones-Drew and instead take Darren McFadden. We heed your warning to never take a quarterback in the first round as we watch someone in the late first-round snatch Aaron Rodgers while we settled for Andre Johnson.

You tell us to make fun of that guy who took LeSean McCoy in the first round because he could've waited and got him in the second round. Well that same guy waited for Drew Brees in the second round and now he's heading to the playoffs and you're watching the last three games of the NFL season with the least amount of interest.

It really ticks me off that these guys claim to be experts in a field where it is impossible to predict the future. So I have decided that from this day forward I will never ask for advice from anyone who says they are an "expert." And you should follow me in this boycott.

Commentary is fine. Advice is forbidden. Stop giving me bad advice and making me throw away my money. If you want to screw people over without involving their money, be a weatherman.