Auburn Just Needs to Name Bobby Lowder As the New Head Coach

Bobby Lowder you say? Who does he coach for? What is his coaching background?  Well, if you've not been plugged into Auburn football, Bobby Lowder is the short-sighted, long pocket banker who thinks his money buys him whatever he wants.

He's been the hemorrhoid on Auburn Athletics for years.  He's the one who won't let a successful coach stay around if they don't hang on his every word, kiss his ring, or any other spot he may point to.

My question is Auburn, if you think this man has all the answers, why not name him to be the next head coach?  Both you and he obviously feel he knows everything and can't make a mistake. So give him a whistle and a clip board and trot him on out.

If he's half the man you and he thinks he is, he'll have Nick Saban fired after a year or two. He'll make Nick Saban's turnaround look like he was doing it in wet cement. You'll go back-to-back as National Champions and have the next two top recruiting classes. And that's only if he's half as good as you both think he is.

Of course, when he runs Auburn's football program to the depths he ran Colonial Bank's stock, maybe then he'll either shut up or you'll get wise enough to quit listening to him.  Then maybe you could recruit a coach who's worth a darn to come to Auburn.

Do you think you'll honestly find a coach who will put up with you as long as Tuberville did, or beat Alabama six in a row? You just fired the best coach you'll have for years and years to come, and don't think your fans are going to let you forget it.

Who wants to come in to Auburn and battle Nick Saban and Lowder each year?  Apparently no one of consequence.  How did Mississippi State grab such wonderful coach ahead of you? Do I have to explain it?

Oh you'll eventually find somebody, some sucker who figures he's hit the lotto with you.  He'll make you sign a five-year deal with a $5 million buyout in it—so when you fire him, he can retire in comfort and laugh at you, too.

It's not like you don't have the money. Lowder's flush with cash now that he got some of that bank buyout money. But why not save some of it? 

Just go ahead and name Lowder as the new head coach at Auburn.