Jay Cutler Cuts off His Engagement to Kristin Cavallari

Jay Cutler, Chicago Bears Quarterback, recently cut off his engagement to Kristin Cavallari. In April 2011, Jay and the Reality TV star Kristin announced their engagement after a seemingly quick 10 month romance.

Does the end of this engagement surprise anyone?  

Lets look at what I call 'Master of the Obvious Facts'. 

1) Biochemistry: The role of dope.

Dopamine that is.

Dopamine is one of our main neurotransmitters that regulates mood, uplifts us and bonds us to others.  When we meet someone to whom we experience a strong attraction, our Dopamine levels rise near 100% from our regular every day levels.  It clouds our judgement as it influences 'rosy glasses', an idealization of our partner, desires to be with them daily, think of them constantly, spike our sex drive and feel we can not live without one another.  After two years with a partner, our dopamine drops down to its pre-lust level. When you and your partner have passed the two year mark, then you can both look objectively as to where you are, where you want to be, and whether the commitment will remain.  

The other main biochemical influence is Oxytocin.

Oxytocin is released when women breast feed and it facilitates bonding. The same action is in place when we experience an orgasm with the object of our desire.  

That's one reason women do not tend to do so well in one night stands without the temptation of calling the partner again. Chemicals bond us! 

When these two chemicals are in play, our judgement is compromised. One needs to take a minimum of two years in dating before an objective view of our self, partner and long term feasibility can be made.

We all want to be under the influence of Dopamine and Oxytocin.

Master of the Obvious Fact: 10 months is not a long enough time together to propose, as you are under the influence of your biology.

2)  Jay is only 28 years old, he has barely had time to manage his pro ball successes, media attention and the financial waterfalls.  Its like a whirlwind life, all spinning in the direction of pleasure, success and pressures.  Being drafted at the age of 23, after a successful college football career with Vanderbilt. Cutler played for the Denver Broncos with a contract of $48 million with $11 million in bonuses in six years.  The Chicago Bears picked him up in 2009, providing a contract through 2013.

He may be an average age for a ball player, yet young in regards to the rest of what life is about.

Kristin Cavallari is a mere 24 years old.  Prime dating age....NOT marrying age. Particularly when biology is taken into account that just one year prior, did her brain finish the last stage of frontal lobe growth that leads us more into maturity with our emotions, decisions and impulses.

Master of the Obvious Fact: Too Young, Too Immature, Too Whirlwind.  

3) Cutlers level of commitment can be challenged when looking at his role in the 2010 NFC championships. As he stood on the sideline watching the Bears lose the championship game to the Green Bay Packers.

Yes he had a knee injury, yet he wasn't removed from the field on a stretcher, which some would say is the only way they would leave a championship game. He limped to the side and seemingly wore a smirk throughout the game. He didn't even attempt to brace his knee and despite riding on the exercise bike, he returned to the bench.

Master of the Obvious Fact: He shows weakness in commitment.

Biochemistry

Age

and

Commitment

All barriers to an successful engagement. No fairy tale ending for Jay and Kristin.