Porn Flick KOs Michael Grant vs. Tye "Big Sky" Fields PPV

OK, call me a sucker.

Last Friday afternoon, during his weekly online boxing chat, Dan Rafael was making fun of anyone who would buy that night's pay-per-view bout between the twin towers, 6'7" heavyweight Michael Grant and 6'8" behemoth Tye "Big Sky" Fields.

"Take a deep breath and step away from the remote. Nobody wants to hurt you. Everything is going to be OK," Rafael replied to one chatter who said he was thinking of buying the fight.

Ah well.  I'm an unabashed fan of heavyweight boxing and not that easily deterred.  

Sure, they're not exactly the Klitschko brothers, but Grant and Fields are two giant heavyweights who can punch. 

So with nothing else on for a Friday night in which the return of spring allergies had me feeling not so hot anyway, I bit the bullet and ordered the reasonably priced ($19.95) event being broadcast from Planet Hollywood in Las Vegas.

After watching a decent undercard highlighted by a good welterweight fight between Joel Casamayor and Miguel Leyva (Casamayor won in a tight split decision), I was stoked as the big fellas finally made their way to the ring, the national anthem was sung, and the fighter introductions were about to be made.

Then the clock struck twelve, literally.

Suddenly, instead of watching my heavyweight face-off, I was asked by my television if I wanted to purchase something called Bi-Girls 2 for $8.95 on the same PPV channel.

After an angry, futile fiddling with the remote—I mean, who pays for porn anymore anyway?—I placed a call to Optimum Cablevision, who predictably had never heard of this bout or these fighters.

"Uh, I'm sorry, who did you say the fighters were again?" the representative asked.

Hey lady, I'm missing TYE "BIG SKY" FIELDS here!

"Uh, what channel did you say it was on again?"

Exasperated, I asked if I purchased Bi-Girls 2, would that mean I could see the rest of the fight, but after some giggling was told this was unlikely and would probably just mean another contested charge on my account.

By the time I got off the phone, a quick perusal of the web revealed that Grant had already stopped Fields, knocking him out in the third round.

I swore I could hear Dan Rafael somewhere in the distance, laughing uproariously.