Gambling On the Games: NFL Week Three

Once, before he finally disappeared into Old Mexico, cranky Ambrose Bierce said:

"The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling."

So, as Wall Street wallows, banks bite the bullet, investment Housed Masters of the Universe become reveled as robber barons, and politicos flounder and flop in their greedy folly, remember the holier-than-thou hypocrites when the next politician moralizes on the evils of sports gambling.

Congress was worried about online poker? Hey buddy, how about regulating the banks instead of regulating my Internet poker.

Lawmakers sometimes worry if we bet on Saturday and Sunday football games. 

Hey, law dogs, watch the hedge-fund makers and the billion-dollar-deal shakers and don't worry so about weekend football parlays or poker.

If we lose, the rubes, we don't get a bail out. We pay. But we rubes bail for the big banker boys and their congressional whore toys when they go South.

End of Rant. The Games go on.

{Stumbles from the soapbox}

Last Week

Minus one unit going in.

The Buffalo Bills, better then everyone thought, win outright. Plus two units.

The Chicago Bears can't finish the fourth quarter but still salvage a push.

The New Orleans Saints don't go marching in. Minus one unit.

Norv Turner finds agonizing new ways to lose. San Diego Chargers minus one unit.

The New York Giants make it look easy. Plus one unit.

Thank you Jon Kitna. Anymore Bobby Layne outbursts? Green Bay Packers. Plus one unit

The Can't Lose Teaser, Colts, Giants, and Chargers didn't lose plus one unit.

Plus three units for the week.

Plus two units for the year.

This Week

Jacksonville Jaguars +5 at Indianapolis Colts: Hate taking the conservative Jack Del Rio, but I like the desperate Jags as a live five-point dogs. The Colts' offensive line is severely banged up, causing their offense to clog up. Only Viking incompetence saved the Colts last week.

Jaguars 23, Colts 20 for two units.

Carolina Panthers + 3 1/2 at Minnesota Vikings: Will the Vikings be any better with QB Gus Frerotte? Could they he be any worse the Tarvaris Jackson? The Panthers been playing solid, and rookie RB Stewart, along with big rookie OT Utah, make them the power team Coach John Fox craves. Plus, Panther WR Steve Smith puts his punch back in the lineup.

Panthers 21, Vikings 19 for one unit

Houston Texans +5 at Tennessee Titans: The Kerry Collins era begins in the land of the Titans. The Texans looked terrible against the Steelers, but I'll take a stab that the Titans aren't near as good as Pittsburgh. The rested Texans defense hangs tough with one-dimensional Tennessee and pressures immobile Kerry Collins.

Texans 19, Titans 16 for one unit

Pittsburgh Steelers + 3 at Philadelphia Eagles: Steelers catch cross-state rival on a short week after deflating loss in Dallas. The Steelers are a solid club. Look for their defense to contain the Eagles while their offense grinds out a win. Wave your Terrible Towel

Steelers 31, Eagles 27 for two units

New Orleans Saints +5 at Denver Broncos: Broncos due for a let down after big wins over division rivals. Turnover prone Saints failed against the 'Skins last week. Look for  Saints to hang tough in Mile High.

Broncos 33, Saints 31 for one unit.

The Can't Lose Teaser of the Week{1-0} Panthers +10 1/2, Steelers +10, Jaguars +12 for one unit.

Last Man Standing {Eagles and Giants played already} The previously played Giants look a lock, Seahawks are tempting, but I'll play the New England Patriots to fillet the fish at home.

The Rambling Road Dog Money Line Parlay Party: Texans, Steelers, Panthers, and Jaguars are all live dogs. Put 'em in a road pack and let 'em howl. One unit will get ya 62-1/2 units. And, provided your unit is big enough, those long odds will get ya to the luxurious, sun soaked, sweet shores of the Caribbean. 

Woof! Woof! Week of the Road Dogs...have a howling good time and remember there are nights when the wolves are silent and the moon howls.

The real, desperate dice rolls will be on Wall Street this week...But our old orb spins on so we will roll dem bones to feed that jones.

No one knows how many rolls they got left, so enjoy every sandwich...And every play.